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O/T I feel like a failure school and life

npcout

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So bear with me, im so lost with life right now. Im an RN, with a decent salary, I LOVE the area I work in, I have a wife, no kids but pets I treat better than most treat there kids. I own a house, have a life, 30ish years old. I have to continue working because I cant afford not to.

I started graduate school for nursing, I just can not physically do it. I enjoy the work, I want to learn, I like to learn, I simply just do not have enough time in my day to do the work needed that has to be done. I literally can not read all the pages I have to read by the due date let alone do the assignments and papers. Since starting the program, I have eaten 1 meal a day, barely drink water, my wife is non-existent, I don't even see my pets, i have not been the gym, i have not taken my supplements, etc.

I am a bodybuilder, i am willing to give up competing for the 3 years, but I can't just give up the gym. That is my happy place.. that is my release, it's where my friends are.

I understood it was going to be hard, but i never knew it to be this time consuming. I sometimes question if I really want to have my masters, or if i just want it so i can tell people i have it and look like a bigger deal or more important.

I just cant see myself sacrificing everything for the next 3 years. Is it really worth it when i currently work a job i love? Sure ill make 20-30k more a year if i graduate, but is money everything? I only work 3, 12 hour shifts a week as it is now which will give me a lot of time with my kids and time to go to the gym when i have them.. i have a good retirement, great health benefits, pto, sick, time, etc.

2 of my pets won't be around in 3 years when i graduate, i can't live not being there for them and not spending the time with them.

All last week, I wanted to get a new garage door lift, i wanted to cut the grass, i wanted to finish the border on the side of my house, I got NOTHING done.

My wife has to do 100% of the stuff around the house, i dont even have time to feed myself.

I graduated with my BSN undergrad with a 3.8gpa.. im smart enough to do it, i no that.. i wont sell myself short. I just simply don't have the time and im not sure if giving up everything to do it is the right thing. My wife and i combined make around $100k and her pay will increase by 10-15K when she lands her "Real" college degree job, and we will pocket more when we pay off our $700 month student loans. We would like to have 2 kids and live a middle class life.

/rant, sorry to vent guys.. just lost.
 
based on what you've written here, you have it a lot better than most people I know..



just keep your head up, and plow through it would be my advice.




know that these difficulties you are facing won't last forever.



this is how character is built
 
So bear with me, im so lost with life right now. Im an RN, with a decent salary, I LOVE the area I work in, I have a wife, no kids but pets I treat better than most treat there kids. I own a house, have a life, 30ish years old. I have to continue working because I cant afford not to.

I started graduate school for nursing, I just can not physically do it. I enjoy the work, I want to learn, I like to learn, I simply just do not have enough time in my day to do the work needed that has to be done. I literally can not read all the pages I have to read by the due date let alone do the assignments and papers. Since starting the program, I have eaten 1 meal a day, barely drink water, my wife is non-existent, I don't even see my pets, i have not been the gym, i have not taken my supplements, etc.

I am a bodybuilder, i am willing to give up competing for the 3 years, but I can't just give up the gym. That is my happy place.. that is my release, it's where my friends are.

I understood it was going to be hard, but i never knew it to be this time consuming. I sometimes question if I really want to have my masters, or if i just want it so i can tell people i have it and look like a bigger deal or more important.

I just cant see myself sacrificing everything for the next 3 years. Is it really worth it when i currently work a job i love? Sure ill make 20-30k more a year if i graduate, but is money everything? I only work 3, 12 hour shifts a week as it is now which will give me a lot of time with my kids and time to go to the gym when i have them.. i have a good retirement, great health benefits, pto, sick, time, etc.

2 of my pets won't be around in 3 years when i graduate, i can't live not being there for them and not spending the time with them.

All last week, I wanted to get a new garage door lift, i wanted to cut the grass, i wanted to finish the border on the side of my house, I got NOTHING done.

My wife has to do 100% of the stuff around the house, i dont even have time to feed myself.

I graduated with my BSN undergrad with a 3.8gpa.. im smart enough to do it, i no that.. i wont sell myself short. I just simply don't have the time and im not sure if giving up everything to do it is the right thing. My wife and i combined make around $100k and her pay will increase by 10-15K when she lands her "Real" college degree job, and we will pocket more when we pay off our $700 month student loans. We would like to have 2 kids and live a middle class life.

/rant, sorry to vent guys.. just lost.

To be honest, you don't sound lost at all. You seem to be very happy and content with where you are before entering grad school. It almost sounds like you are simply going to grad school because you feel obligated for some reason and are looking for permission to quit it. Quit grad school and do whats best for you and your family, money can't buy happiness. If you are already happy with where you are in life(which it sound like you were), then why sacrifice that?
 
So bear with me, im so lost with life right now. Im an RN, with a decent salary, I LOVE the area I work in, I have a wife, no kids but pets I treat better than most treat there kids. I own a house, have a life, 30ish years old. I have to continue working because I cant afford not to.

I started graduate school for nursing, I just can not physically do it. I enjoy the work, I want to learn, I like to learn, I simply just do not have enough time in my day to do the work needed that has to be done. I literally can not read all the pages I have to read by the due date let alone do the assignments and papers. Since starting the program, I have eaten 1 meal a day, barely drink water, my wife is non-existent, I don't even see my pets, i have not been the gym, i have not taken my supplements, etc.

I am a bodybuilder, i am willing to give up competing for the 3 years, but I can't just give up the gym. That is my happy place.. that is my release, it's where my friends are.

I understood it was going to be hard, but i never knew it to be this time consuming. I sometimes question if I really want to have my masters, or if i just want it so i can tell people i have it and look like a bigger deal or more important.

I just cant see myself sacrificing everything for the next 3 years. Is it really worth it when i currently work a job i love? Sure ill make 20-30k more a year if i graduate, but is money everything? I only work 3, 12 hour shifts a week as it is now which will give me a lot of time with my kids and time to go to the gym when i have them.. i have a good retirement, great health benefits, pto, sick, time, etc.

2 of my pets won't be around in 3 years when i graduate, i can't live not being there for them and not spending the time with them.

All last week, I wanted to get a new garage door lift, i wanted to cut the grass, i wanted to finish the border on the side of my house, I got NOTHING done.

My wife has to do 100% of the stuff around the house, i dont even have time to feed myself.

I graduated with my BSN undergrad with a 3.8gpa.. im smart enough to do it, i no that.. i wont sell myself short. I just simply don't have the time and im not sure if giving up everything to do it is the right thing. My wife and i combined make around $100k and her pay will increase by 10-15K when she lands her "Real" college degree job, and we will pocket more when we pay off our $700 month student loans. We would like to have 2 kids and live a middle class life.

/rant, sorry to vent guys.. just lost.

It doesn't matter brother tough it out... I hear you... I feel like that too, even wanted to just drink myself to death, I make close to 7 figures a year, but I keep thinking what's the point? my ex-wife lectured me, saying that I ought to be a shamed of myself, that people would dream to do what I do (design buildings, architecture/engineering) but I thought that she doesn't get it... She's 13 years my senior and I guess she did get it and I didn't...

I wanted to drink, I get pissed at myself and everyone else, then after a while... I KICK MYSELF IN THE FUCKING ASS!!! I sacrificed 7 years of the gym, I was a 240lb 19 year old, big potential, to do my service work and I did drink a lot, ate whenever, I got fat, people that I was a fat guy, when I was always skinny... they were shocked when they saw me lose weight later, but that shit wasn't me... whatever... guess what? i'm happiest now than ever... and I got back in the gym after doing my service work (otherwise, I wouldn't be here) trust me it is worth it!!!

just tough that shit the fuck out!!! I worked construction, I took a bus, then walked 10 blocks on stony island to the university of Chicago, mostly in snow blowing in my face, just to GET TO WORK!!! as a laborer, to pay or my school... people who know me think i'm privileged because my family is wealthy in real estate... but I moved out at 17... did it on my own... toughen up bro, sometimes you need someone to tell you that... get off your ass and keep doing it, don't be a damn bitch and I say that as a something trying to act as a friend... btw, i'm doing great now, thank god every day i'm alive, move my life, love my son... god bless... not sure if this helps, but that's what I did...
 
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Depends on what going through the extra schooling gains you. If it's likely to mean even more of your time at a job when you're finished away from the people and things you love for a gain of only $30k / year then maybe, maybe not. All depends on how you see your future.
You obviously have the ability to get through it, but only you and you alone know if what's on the other side is worth it.
 
You have it better than many people bro so realize that

sounds to me its too much stress for you to take on. why not just do your job that pays decently well and be more happy? or is the reward for the extra degree worth it (student loans to be paid back and if you dont pay them back with a certain time they raise interest, and most of all no time for gym, wife, dogs, meals, etc) personally , just myself id be satisfied with what youve got, everyone is different though and its your choice, maybe do what your gut tells you or ask God for an answer
 
Find a grad school that caters to working professionals, and take one or two classes at a time.
 
Tough it out and remember quit a few career's retirement package's are based on what you make annually. You aren't working for today, but are working for retirement.
 
I feel you man. I had the same situation. I graduated my BS with a 3.8 also. But take my word for it, almost nobody actually reads every page of assigned reading. Try to skim the important stuff and the end of chapter reviews. Communicate your difficulties to your professors and ask them for advice on how get through the class with minimal wasted effort. They will understand. Don't worry about the lawn and the house chores. Give the wife a quick poke in passing. Such is the life of a working adult student. You can fix all that after graduation. Overall try to not be so hard on yourself. You are doing just fine.

BTW an older friend of mine once told me to ask myself, if I die right now will it matter if I read every page of assigned work? Or graduated with a 3.8? Or had an immaculate lawn? No. It's the relationships that matter and the mark you leave on others. So when in doubt just take a break, play with your pets, make love to your wife, call your mom and tell her you love her. Good luck.
 
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You are not lost man. What I see is someone who gets it. All your life your told money means success. You are seeing what I started seeing around the same age. I am so happy I did get go back from my MBA. Sure could have made more money but my current job is great ECT. Pretty much same situation as you two college grads making a bit more but I am older. But I have two kids who are amazing, a greta wife, faith and a dog. I could trade my 5 minute daily commute to an hour 15 each way and grab 20k to 25k extra a month along with more stress. I do not think it is worth it. I would have to quit gym or kid time.


Congrats for getting it.
 
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idk, I know I am the minority on this but I don't like school or believe in it all that much...

I left school before I graduated and started 4 businesses...

this was an education.

I did all paper work n registered corporations and such while in school, left a year early n started businesses form scratch.

yes I had help, and guidance but still too businesses from nothing to a pretty good something before leaving to go back to school. lol

never made it back to school, just too a break then opened more offices.

I like doing my own thing no matter what it is.

not really a paycheck kind of guy, feast or famine I feel good knowing I do it on my own...
 
You work 3 days a week, have no kids and you don`t have time to eat because of school? Sorry but I`m not gonna join your pity party. Like others said, its sound life is good and you are comfortable. My wife has been in school full time for last 3 years taking 15-18 credits in sciences, she graduates in December with a 4.0 BS in biology and genetics, then she goes to naturopathic med school, and has been running her business the whole time!! We have 2 kids 4 & 5, one in Kinder, one in day care 3 days/week, AND I just started school for 12 credits/semester, plus I work about 22 hours/week.

You "don`t have time" is an excuse for you don`t want it bad enough.
 
If money is what your after work your way up the clinical ladder and get into management. Your probably already a cn lll by now.
 
if i understood correctly and it's going to be only three years, i say stick with it. you're in your 30's, and these are producing years, you're free of kids and the other restraints that come with age (physical, possible financial limitations) and you're in a position to do it.

if your wife is willing to stick it out with you, i say stick with the plan.

you just sound overwhelmed, try to look at in smaller pieces instead ALL the hoops you have to jump through.
 

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