***Prayers for my marriage***

[rock75]

Well it's finally come to a head and she has brought up separation and divorce; some other shit has been going on and long story short I've made her feel like a horrible wife and a whore for my perception and insecurities of a situation.

She is my world, my kids are my world and the thought of not being with them every night is going to kill me, I know i'm not strong enough for that.

Please pray for me as I have put this in the Lord's hands


FUCK!!!! i hate crying like a bitch at work

 

[Deansreturned]

Bro you need to be telling her that

Not the members of PM.

Not trying to scold you for opening up, but be honest with her and try to get her to work on things with you

 

[richiec]

Bro you need to be telling her that

Not the members of PM.

Not trying to scold you for opening up, but be honest with her and try to get her to work on things with you

:yeahthat::yeahthat::yeahthat::yeahthat::yeahthat:

100% tell your wife that Rock75!!!!!

 

[Lymelight]

Well it's finally come to a head and she has brought up separation and divorce; some other shit has been going on and long story short I've made her feel like a horrible wife and a whore for my perception and insecurities of a situation.

She is my world, my kids are my world and the thought of not being with them every night is going to kill me, I know i'm not strong enough for that.

Please pray for me as I have put this in the Lord's hands


FUCK!!!! i hate crying like a bitch at work

Time to fight human nature and lay it all on the line with her....after almost 20 years of being divorced, I still get bent up at times when I think about it....and every relationship Ive had since then has been affected by it...and that's without any kids.

 

[rock75]

Bro you need to be telling her that

Not the members of PM.

Not trying to scold you for opening up, but be honest with her and try to get her to work on things with you

I have, i've apologized and have taken full blunt of my actions. I've told her just that, I want her, I want our marriage and I want our family. I'm not getting any reciprocation on her end.

Last night, i tried calling her a couple of times and the phone beeped as she was on the other line, so I blocked my # and called who i thought she was talking to and their phone beeped as they were on the other line. She finally called me back to which I blocked my # again and tried their # and it was clear as well. Could be pure coincidence and I have no proof and with where we are right now I can't say or do anything for fear of making things worse. I'm in a real catch 22 because I want to fight for my marriage but without throwing fuel on the fire I have to bite my tongue and let it ride. That's not easy to do when you see your life crashing around you!!

 

[BigDM]

My prayers go out to you Rock. Rely on the Lord as much as possible during this time and give it ALL to him. I've been in a very similar situation for the last month or so and I can relate to how bad you must feel right now. Try not to rock the boat with her and let your emotions get the best of you. Use this time to work on getting yourself straightened out, too. This is a great opportunity for you to see what you need to change and to become the man, husband and father that God made you to be. Take advantage of it and try to see it as a blessing. Not easy by any stretch of the imagination, but it's possible and works. Also, next time you speak to her, try to keep it low, slow and easy and try to be empathetic as to what she may be going through. Mirror back, listen intently and speak from the heart.

God bless brother

 

[rock75]

My prayers go out to you Rock. Rely on the Lord as much as possible during this time and give it ALL to him. I've been in a very similar situation for the last month or so and I can relate to how bad you must feel right now. Try not to rock the boat with her and let your emotions get the best of you. Use this time to work on getting yourself straightened out, too. This is a great opportunity for you to see what you need to change and to become the man, husband and father that God made you to be. Take advantage of it and try to see it as a blessing. Not easy by any stretch of the imagination, but it's possible and works. Also, next time you speak to her, try to keep it low, slow and easy and try to be empathetic as to what she may be going through. Mirror back, listen intently and speak from the heart.

God bless brother

I FUCKING HATE CRYING AT WORK!!!

Appreciate the words BigDM!! Uggh, i never thought we would be here, never thought I would have to even fathom the possibility of not seeing my son and daughter every day. This fucking blows a big fat fucking donkey dick!!

 

[TestMe24]

Prayers your way brother! Been there .

We're all just a bunch of bros tryna make it, mayne!

 

[chgolatin2]

Sadly prayer nor the "lord" will do anything for you or you're marriage. The only person that can do something is "you" yeah it sucks, but life is hard. At the end of the road you will see that it wasn't meant to me and maybe for a good reason that for now you may not have all the answers. Feeling sorry for yourself, etc won't help you achieve anything. We "ALL" have been there b4, we all beat ourselves up, feel sorry etc but at the end it's all a lesson in life that needs to be learned. I suggest you read a blood called, "life greatest lessons" by Hal Urban.. Peace may fall unto to you... Stay strong and try to remain positive. It's hard to do, but baby steps can lead to even bigger steps in the future

 

[SugarFree]

I have, i've apologized and have taken full blunt of my actions. I've told her just that, I want her, I want our marriage and I want our family. I'm not getting any reciprocation on her end.

Last night, i tried calling her a couple of times and the phone beeped as she was on the other line, so I blocked my # and called who i thought she was talking to and their phone beeped as they were on the other line. She finally called me back to which I blocked my # again and tried their # and it was clear as well. Could be pure coincidence and I have no proof and with where we are right now I can't say or do anything for fear of making things worse. I'm in a real catch 22 because I want to fight for my marriage but without throwing fuel on the fire I have to bite my tongue and let it ride. That's not easy to do when you see your life crashing around you!!

Well that doesnt sound good at all. And I cant help but wonder if your putting too much blame on yourself. It sounds like you had some insecurities about something but from what your implying it sounds like you may have been right.

 

[rock75]

Well that doesnt sound good at all. And I cant help but wonder if your putting too much blame on yourself. It sounds like you had some insecurities about something but from what your implying it sounds like you may have been right.

Who else can I put the blame on? I've always said a happy wife = happy life, my wife is not happy and my life is crumbling. I know I'm not supposed to feel sorry for myself but it's a lot easier said than done. I may be right, I don't know I have no proof - just my insecurities and perception of things. If I make it a big issue now then all hell will break loose. Part of me wants to confront but I know that we lead to a fight, jail, legal fees, possibly not being able to see my kids etc etc and to me right now that is the most important thing and I can't really do anything that would make that not a possibility.

 

[ldog40]

Who else can I put the blame on? I've always said a happy wife = happy life, my wife is not happy and my life is crumbling. I know I'm not supposed to feel sorry for myself but it's a lot easier said than done. I may be right, I don't know I have no proof - just my insecurities and perception of things. If I make it a big issue now then all hell will break loose. Part of me wants to confront but I know that we lead to a fight, jail, legal fees, possibly not being able to see my kids etc etc and to me right now that is the most important thing and I can't really do anything that would make that not a possibility.

Rock,

I, obviously, don't know all the details; but I can say from personal experience, there's usually some sort of radar that goes off in your head, but we as men, tend to ignore or discount it, simply because of our ego. The caveat is, I am saying this, assuming that the man involved isn't an overly jealous or possessive person. I was never the jealous type, nor had I ever been when it came to my ex, but when I felt something was wrong, I was dead on. I even told her a few months before she got caught (by the other guy's wife) that I knew something was going on. And I have been able to tell if something was fishy in each and every relationship I have been in, before and since. From the bit that I have seen, you don't appear to be possessive or jealous and the fact that you were worried that you may have been being insecure shows that you do have the ability to question and think things through. Like I said, I don't know the details, and I know this is an extremely emotional period, but try to find some time and a quiet spot and just think and be honest with yourself and you'll figure out what's best for you. But I will say, if you two aren't happy and aren't both getting what you want from the relationship, and BOTH of you aren't willing to work on it, you're spinning your wheels. I know from experience. It's even tougher when there are kids involved, but kids are a hell of a lot brighter and than we give them credit for and are usually a lot more emotionally intelligent than adults, so DON'T use them as a reason to stay in a bad, unsalvageable relationship. All you'll be doing is teaching them to accept an unfulfilling relationship as the norm and that, in my mind is tantamount to child abuse. My son, who was only 6 at the time, told me he was glad Mommy and I weren't together anymore because he could tell we weren't happy and we were always fighting.

I forgot to add - Happy wife = happy life, but you can't MAKE her happy. That's something she has to learn and achieve on her own. All you can do is help to KEEP her happy. In the end, everybody's happiness is dependent upon themselves, first and foremost.

 

[rock75]

Rock,

I, obviously, don't know all the details; but I can say from personal experience, there's usually some sort of radar that goes off in your head, but we as men, tend to ignore or discount it, simply because of our ego. The caveat is, I am saying this, assuming that the man involved isn't an overly jealous or possessive person. I was never the jealous type, nor had I ever been when it came to my ex, but when I felt something was wrong, I was dead on. I even told her a few months before she got caught (by the other guy's wife) that I knew something was going on. And I have been able to tell if something was fishy in each and every relationship I have been in, before and since. From the bit that I have seen, you don't appear to be possessive or jealous and the fact that you were worried that you may have been being insecure shows that you do have the ability to question and think things through. Like I said, I don't know the details, and I know this is an extremely emotional period, but try to find some time and a quiet spot and just think and be honest with yourself and you'll figure out what's best for you. But I will say, if you two aren't happy and aren't both getting what you want from the relationship, and BOTH of you aren't willing to work on it, you're spinning your wheels. I know from experience. It's even tougher when there are kids involved, but kids are a hell of a lot brighter and than we give them credit for and are usually a lot more emotionally intelligent than adults, so DON'T use them as a reason to stay in a bad, unsalvageable relationship. All you'll be doing is teaching them to accept an unfulfilling relationship as the norm and that, in my mind is tantamount to child abuse. My son, who was only 6 at the time, told me he was glad Mommy and I weren't together anymore because he could tell we weren't happy and we were always fighting.

I forgot to add - Happy wife = happy life, but you can't MAKE her happy. That's something she has to learn and achieve on her own. All you can do is help to KEEP her happy. In the end, everybody's happiness is dependent upon themselves, first and foremost.

I appreciate your words ldog, while I may not like them as the harsh reality is steadily sinking in I do appreciate them. uggghhh, it breaks my heart for my kids man it really does and I know you can relate.

Could use some talking to buddy as you can relate pretty well to my situation. If you could PM me ur # or I could PM u mine if you would talk, i would appreciate it.

 

[rock75]

Anyone for that matter that can chat I can use the words...she has the kids and her parents and I have an empty house that my family used to live in

 

[richiec]

Sadly prayer nor the "lord" will do anything for you or you're marriage. The only person that can do something is "you" yeah it sucks, but life is hard. At the end of the road you will see that it wasn't meant to me and maybe for a good reason that for now you may not have all the answers. Feeling sorry for yourself, etc won't help you achieve anything. We "ALL" have been there b4, we all beat ourselves up, feel sorry etc but at the end it's all a lesson in life that needs to be learned. I suggest you read a blood called, "life greatest lessons" by Hal Urban.. Peace may fall unto to you... Stay strong and try to remain positive. It's hard to do, but baby steps can lead to even bigger steps in the future

Wrong, and YOU should not be giving relationship advice. I hate to be so blunt with it, but the threads you've started about you and your ex completely disqualifies you from giving advice on what people should do in relationships.

Rock, I don't know if you've ever read or even heard of the book "Love Dare", but the movie Fire Proof was based off it somewhat.
Talk to your wife, ask her for 45 days before she makes any big decisions regarding your marriage. BUY THIS BOOK and APPLY ITS PRINCIPLES!!! I've read it and it's a very good book. I don't know the details of your marriage or what's transpired, but this can help repair what's happened. It will open you up and humble you

 

[rock75]

Wrong, and YOU should not be giving relationship advice. I hate to be so blunt with it, but the threads you've started about you and your ex completely disqualifies you from giving advice on what people should do in relationships.

Rock, I don't know if you've ever read or even heard of the book "Love Dare", but the movie Fire Proof was based off it somewhat.
Talk to your wife, ask her for 45 days before she makes any big decisions regarding your marriage. BUY THIS BOOK and APPLY ITS PRINCIPLES!!! I've read it and it's a very good book. I don't know the details of your marriage or what's transpired, but this will can help repair what's happened. It will open you up and humble you

Thanks Richie, appreciate the looking out and will grab this book.

 

[little slice]

OP, do you use steroids?

 

[rock75]

OP, do you use steroids?

NO, have not in some time. Not using anything and have not for months.

 

[rock75]

Ldog, thanks for lending your hear brotha!!!

 

[little slice]

NO, have not in some time. Not using anything and have not for months.

oh ok good.. just wanted to make sure that you have every last aas-related thing out of the house.

we had case similar to this on another board a few years back. the woman just upped and left, and took the kids (we believe she had been cheating).

anyways, her husband was not able to remove all of the aas-related things in his home in time, and she used that against him in divorce court, even though she was fine with it during their marriage.. women right?

anyways, since this is the U.S., she basically got the house and about 85% of his money, and because of the aas-related stuff in his house, he was considered a "threat to his children" and his ex-wife got full custody. she may have told the court that he was physically abusive towards her and the children (women do this.. it's called the "silver bullet")

he ended up not being able to cope with the depression and took his own life.


so im glad you're more proactive on the drug situation and ill keep you in my prayers