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Daughter is growing up

JustWannaBeHuge

FOUNDING Member / Kilo Klub Member
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I had my daughter last night as I get her one day during the week, then on the weekends and even though we've been planning for her 16th birthday for the last few weeks as far as renting the hall, making food plans ect, we've been looking at colleges and dental schools... but last night..it really hit me.. she told me about her class ring and how the down payment is due next week and it was like "holy shit, she's graduating in 2 years, I need to put down this money, this is real, she's really growing up"

This morning, I've been looking at our pics, remembering when I used to lift at home when her mom and I were together and even after we split up, and her putting the 5 pound plates on the bar for me, or trying to put the collar on the bar, then I'd tell her to squeeze it while I just "held it" for her and we'd slide the collar on the bar together. I remember years ago grabbing two 2-liters of rootbeer and her carrying them for me and telling me we need to lift again after I took a lay off from lifting because the sodas were getting heavy and she had to build her arms back up.

She's a smart kid, she's in all advanced placement classes for the classes that have it anyway, she plays instruments and sings, she's also played soccer and softball, now she wants to be a dentist so we've been looking at the schools... I've always been over protective of her due to some fucked up shit that happened to me as a kid, and I never wanted her or another child to experience that, when she was 12, she had a situation where she was outside at 2am with my ex's niece, so when I found out, I told her what happened to me and why I'm over protective of her, for her safety....I also punished her ass for being outside at that time, other than that, she's never been in any trouble, or anything of the sort... but I worry. I'll always worry.

I'm in therapy now, mainly because I'm back at trying to control my temper with other people. I've always had a bad temper, and being over protective of her, I've been rather blunt to some people over the years, in a very rude way. I know my faults and i'm trying to fix them, people have said how they see a lot of improvement with how I handle myself and with how I deal with other people now. I've always tried being a positive role model for her, but I've messed up a few times when around other people that I thought they didn't have her best interest or safety at heart. anyway...

She's now going to the movies more with her friends, then with her old man, which is fine, I understand that. We still do our father dauther movie days, dinners/breakfast/lunch/snacks, or just chill and laugh our asses off at stupid shit, we've got the same type of sense of humor, which is kind of scary, esp. since my brother his wife, and my girlfriend are the same way...so all of us can pick on each other, laugh and have a great time....

The thing is, looking out at the world... seeing so much fucked up shit happening, thinking about what happened to me as a kid, and how it fucked my head up so bad... so little respect for human life. With giving your kids more freedom to make more adult like decisions, or even hang out at the mall. How do you keep sane without becoming over bearing? I trust her, I don't trust most other people. I have a lot of trust issues with other people...a lot... which is also one of the things I'm working on in therapy.

Part of me thinks if something does happen, it'll be my fault for not being there to protect her. She's going to another concert this summer with her friends, 2 are 16 and the other 2 are 19, the older girls are graduated and were my daughter and her friends "college prep" friends, or whatever they were called, basically they were seniors that were showing the freshmen how important it is to prepare for college, and they still talk to them even though the older girls are now college freshmen, they give them input about college classes,discuss studying habits and stuff like that.

After the concert, they want to hang out and see if they can get pics of the band, then go eat... I'm not sure how I feel about that yet, but there's still months away so we'll discuss it more then.

I go to my therapist tomorrow for our weekly meet up, but I just had a lot on my mind after looking at pics and me and my little lifting buddy that has grown up... Maybe there's more me reminiscing in this post then actually making sense or asking anything. Guess i just needed an outlet. At the end of the day... I don't want her to grow up. I want my little lifting buddy back. :eek:
 
Hey bro, I had some really ducked up things happen to me when I was a kid. And I have a 20yr old daughter. We want to protect them from everything, and they know that. But we can't control everything, sometimes we just need to trust it's in Gods hand... as they get older, we need to let go. My daughter knows I want to protect her, and if someone ever did anything to her, I'd go nuts, and the police wouldn't be involved...but she respects me more for slowly treating her as an adult as she grew up. At 20 she tells me everything, even asks for dating/relationship advice. If I tell her the guy is no good, she cuts it off. I'd rather have this than the relationship she has with my ex wife, who doesn't know a thing about her but her grades in school.
 
All you can do is trust that you raised them to make the right decisions in there life.

My daughter is now 17 and just started dating last year. Man Ive been dreading this since she was little. But surprisingly enough it winded up being a very nice and respectful kid. I actually winded up liking him and I dont like anyone...

To back track a bit, she did actually try bringing one other boy home before this. I set my 2 dogs on him (an akita and a black lab). My wife, the kids mother and my daughter were all chasing him around the yard trying to pull the dogs off him. That one never came back.
 

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