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personal problems and rhabdomyolyse

M@NU

Well-known member
Registered
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Feb 5, 2017
Messages
1,082
Hey Guys,

i am quite down at the moment.
I make a long story short because i need your advice:
- girlfriend chats with another dude in an online game since around 3-4 weeks.
- Since 1 week, they exchanged whatsapp and chat all day long.
- I tell her i dont like it, she says they are just friends, keeps chatting
- she tells me on saturday she would like to meet "this friend"
- i check online chat in game (she doesnt let her smartphone out of her hands although it was no problem months ago) and see they chat about sex ("a bed is all we need babe, blabla")
- I ask her wtf, she tells just friends and i shouldnt overreact, it was just fun, shit talk, she loves me, and wants to stay with me blabla
- I dont know if i want to believe her, go train, feel sick, cant sleep
- whole body muscle pain on sunday, can barely move, cant sleep
- go to work on monday, go to pee, see its like coke coloured
- go to doc, bp stress related through the roof (190/120), get diazepam (like benzo i guess) shot to calm. EKG is okay besides very high heart rate. sends me to urologist.
- Urologist takes ultrasounds from kidneys, nothing to see, got blood drawn, waiting for results now.

now i have read online and my symptoms seem to be a rhabdomyolyse. (fits almost 100%). I feel already much better today and pee is light again, but i am not sure if i should still go to ER?

now my questions for you guys.
- what should i do about my girlfriend. (more infos: we live together since 3 years, she has no driver license, she needs me to drive to work etc and the appartment is bought by myself --> she says she loves me to stay in appartment and use me as a driver etc..?)
- should i "throw her out" or make her an ultimatum?
- if i had rhabdo and i feel better, is it okay to go and start to train lightly again? i need something to keep me from thinking about the situation and tv sucks..)

sorry for the wall of text and the spelling mistakes, i still can not concentrate 100%..
Thanks for your help.. seems the saying is true.. iron stays forever, other things wont
 
urologist called:
Kidney values are ok, however, "liver enzymes" ALT and AST are above 2000 and i have to retest tomorrow.
I already had a routine blood test end of last week after 3 days of no training:
alt and ast 84 and 56..
wtf
can some1 get a heart attack from a breakup?!
 
Get fucking rid of her now. How is that even a question.

And mental stress can seriously fuck up your body, to what extent I don’t know.
 
Your her personal chauffeur you put a roof over her head and you’ve given 3 years of your life to her, in return she’s trying to go fuck some video game douchebag and made you sick over it? You already know the answer, she sounds like a real piece of shit and you have some rose colored glasses on. Get rid of her and don’t ever look back, you’ll be much happier in the end. Let’s see if gamer fag will do a tenth of this shit you did for her, fuck that. If you don’t its just a matter of time until she finds a new sucker, she’s already looking, or you stay the sucker and she does this shit to you forever.

Stress like that can fuck you as hard as anything, I’ve been through it.
 
I have no experience with your physical ailments so cannot advise on those, as far as your girlfriend, she should already be out of your life, the fact you´re here asking about it shows you most likely love her (good) and you are insecure (bad). Unfortunately the seed of doubt has been planted and your relationship is now toxic to you, so stop being a cuck, react and ask her to leave.

Why care about someone who clearly doesn´t give a fuck about you?
 
thanks for your words guys..
first of all, news from doc:
he also believes it is rhabdo and she told me to see the ER today,
i declined because i am much better than yesterday.
we made a deal - i go to him tomorrow, we get bloods done @ ER and if its better i can go home and recover there, if worse i have to stay in ER..
if anybody doesnt know:
rhabdo is destruction of muscle cells. myoglobin is releaed in the blood stream an its toxic to kidneys. thats probably why my pee was dark. however, blood test show kidneys are OK and my pee is light again. CK and ALT/AST still through the roof..

now to my girl:
well, unfortunately, i would say i am a beta male. I never said no to any wish. You can deadlift 405 pounds 7 times and still be a weak male..
but i think i did a good thing. She told me she still loves me and we should try but i think she just tells this because she has no money for an appartment and she also has no contact to her parents or close friends. so she is afraid i will drop her. I said she should go see for an appartment, idc how.
i also said i dont want to have her until end of november here.
@Nyoco:
i love/loved her more than anything else. it was my real first love and we are already together since a long time. of course it hurts.
and i know i am weak in the relationship department.. :(
@FrancisK:
good summary.. i also cooked our meals
 
Look out for Numero Uno

Take care of your physical and mental health. Even if she wasn't screwing you around and acting the fool (which she most definitely is), you need to be healthy for her or anyone for that matter.
That being said, dump her, move on and find your inner strength again. Throw her out. She needs you, you don't need her or the games and stress she's giving you in return for being a great guy to her.
Good luck and good riddance to lying users.
 
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The assumption that the monogamous relationship model is going to work for everyone is insane. I suggest looking into polyamory, there is a good book on it called More Than Two. You can't force someone to love only you and you can't expect a young person not to want other relationships in their lives at some point. The choice is losing that person or understanding their need for a different kind of relationship. If you treat them right they will stay with you or return to you, controlling them won't work for very long.

No one on this forum will agree with me ;)

As for the rhabdo, drink lots of water, stop overtraining, listen to your doctor.
 
Stop working out and start playing the online game, both problems solved
 
it's worth noting that this is essentially a classic case of the dualistic mating strategy of the female



the Beta - OP here is playing the role of the beta. he provides resources and financial security to the female. he also provides blowjobs to the alpha when the female is 'too tired' or has a 'headache'. he will also raise the alpha's children.


the Alpha - mysterious "online friend". He gets sex from the female while providing her with no real tangible benefit (other than said sex).



it is also worth noting, that many, many men are in the Beta role, without knowing it :eek:
 
Like everyone else said, let her go. I would give her 30 days to get out and if she isn't out by then throw her out. Put it all in writing too and try to have her sign it. If she wont, you should at least have a witness there to sign it to prove she saw it. I think if you just throw her out in the street without 30 days notice you might lose a law suit if she chose to do so. Just trying to cover your ass so she doesn't really smack you. That guy she is into might give her ideas. She does have legal rights believe it or not. Maybe we have some lawyers here that might help more than me.

With my first wife I was married for 3 years and she slept around on me. If this girl hasn't done it already she will. I believe things will only get worse and since she isn't contributing to the household and doesn't even have a driver's license she really doesn't sound like she is trying too hard in the relationship. Get out now before it gets even worse. Can you imagine what would happen if she "forgot" to take her birth control pills for a few days and she got pregnant? I would wonder if the baby was mine and then you might be stuck in a lifelong relationship with this girl because you have a baby together. Kids are going to link you lifelong weather you like it or not.
 
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on top of what Maldorf said, I would strongly advise getting a few mates to live at your place while she is moving out.




that way, you have witnesses when she inevitably accuses you of some insane bullshit.
 
on top of what Maldorf said, I would strongly advise getting a few mates to live at your place while she is moving out.




that way, you have witnesses when she inevitably accuses you of some insane bullshit.

YES! I did not think about that. Having people there that can back your side of things up just incase things go bad. This would help if she calls the cops on you and/or if you end up in court for some reason. She could claim you physically abused her, call the cops etc.
 

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