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My Tinder experience

ShortStop

Well-known member
Kilo Klub Member
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Oct 4, 2007
Messages
1,222
I haven't been laid in awhile. I'm a working single dad and I just haven't had the time... So when this red head from Tinder contacted me... I was like ok. She was only a few miles away. Called me up like dick service. She told me she was 160lbs goes to the gym all the time. So I didn't think nothing about her weight. I'm 190lbs. She's goes to the gym. I don't mind thick. It didn't seem unreasonable. Man this bitch had her skinny pictures up. Catfished me like a mf. I was already there. I'm like fuck it. She was drunk. I don't remember how my fingers got in her mouth but she showed me she had no gag reflex. I went to the gym b4 I got there because idk stupid me wanted to have a pump when I got there. This woman wore me the fuck out. 160 pounds my ass. Trying to hold up this women's legs and Jack hammer that ass at the same time had me quivering and shaking gasping for air... I felt like a linebacker trying to even budge her ass off the bed. At one point I had to hold on to the headboard so her legs didn't fall and throw me off the bed. I was cramping up dying. I couldn't breathe... Being on top of her when she breathed she could move me up and down. I bit off more than I could chew. I wore myself out real quick and I was thinking I shouldn't of went to the gym. This was cardio and weight lifting at the same time. So I'm thinking I need a break. Let's check out this gag reflex. So I tried to drag her to the side of the bed where I could hang her head off so I could try n dip my dick down her throat. Yeah I watch too much porn... I tried with one hand. I tried with two. I couldn't even move this bitch, Lol. I was done. Fuck this! I had no problem calling this woman out. Hey sweetheart. There's no way in hell your 160 pounds. She's like you calling me fat. Idc... You can call it butter and smear it all over your ass. There's no way in hell your 160 pounds. It shouldn't matter.. You should love me for who I am. You were 160 pounds on the phone. I just met you. She knew. Needless to say I wasn't her type anymore. Well likewise darling and on the way out she's like I don't like your Facebook page anyways. Yeah I know because all those women actually go to the gym and workout.
That was my Tinder experience. Next time I'm cammin 1st. Women made me feel weak and out of shape. I tried too hard too quick thinking I was going to kill it. That was the biggest woman I've ever slept with. Idk how to fuck those big women. 😁
 
I have been single for the past two years following a 10+ year relationship. What I have found with online dating is you won't find someone of equal quality on them and its a backdoor for ratchet women to try and DM you.
 
I'm interested in using Tinder but how is it for older guys in their 50s ?

There's a lot of legitimate women on there but there's also a lot of scams. Mostly the younger ones with there fan pages and cash apps. All these women selling it now a days but I guess these guys are paying for it.
Bumble is another site where the women have to make the 1st move. As long as you both like on each others pictures.. There free sites so why not set up a profile. At least you get the entertainment value of it.
I'm 52
 
A lot of girls got big in lockdown :D Most women on dating websites also post pics using a skill they have perfected over the years of basically angling their body to make them look as small as possible. It's like the opposite of what some guys do to make them look as big as possible. Many will also have about 8 pics and they are all shoulder and above so beware of those ones. I am nice all the time but I think it's wrong deceiving people like that. I like girls with curves but I am not attracted to fat girls at all so if a girl has no body pics I ask for her IG or facebook just so I can see them properly.

At least you met someone real and had sex. Tinder is full of fake profiles and I sometimes go on it and it's like 20 amazing girls in a row. I tried POF and that is full of real women wanting to date and find someone special and I will literally scroll through 200 profiles and not find a single one attractive. I had to laugh as I saw one the other day and thought wow she is stunning then I looked closer and realized it was a fake profile with Eiza González's pics :eek::D
 
I have been single for the past two years following a 10+ year relationship. What I have found with online dating is you won't find someone of equal quality on them and its a backdoor for ratchet women to try and DM you.
I've met my past two babies mamas on on-line dating... Both 10 year relationships. I've been single for 3 years now so I get it... I'm not as young as I use to be. A little harder to find somebody. I don't really want to take care of another one
 
A lot of girls got big in lockdown :D Most women on dating websites also post pics using a skill they have perfected over the years of basically angling their body to make them look as small as possible. It's like the opposite of what some guys do to make them look as big as possible. Many will also have about 8 pics and they are all shoulder and above so beware of those ones. I am nice all the time but I think it's wrong deceiving people like that. I like girls with curves but I am not attracted to fat girls at all so if a girl has no body pics I ask for her IG or facebook just so I can see them properly.

At least you met someone real and had sex. Tinder is full of fake profiles and I sometimes go on it and it's like 20 amazing girls in a row. I tried POF and that is full of real women wanting to date and find someone special and I will literally scroll through 200 profiles and not find a single one attractive. I had to laugh as I saw one the other day and thought wow she is stunning then I looked closer and realized it was a fake profile with Eiza González's pics :eek::D
I was on her Facebook and that's all she had was headshots. Her pictures were probably like 10 years old. She was pretty at one time. I jumped at the chance because it's been so long since I got a real good bite on there.
Same here with Pof that's why I tried these newer sites. Lesson learned. A little more research next time.
Somebody just turned me on to bumble where the women have to make the 1st move as long as you both like on each others pictures.
Doesn't hurt to cast a line out.
 
Last edited:
Welcome to 2021 , the year that is trying to out do 2020
 
I've had a lot of success on Ok cupid and Bumble. With all the CVD shut downs hooking up has never been easier or cheaper. Like shooting fish in a barrel.
People have been locked up with no where to vent and are desperate for physical interaction.
First date is usually coffee or drinks to get a visual confirmation. Second date is a ride on the hotdog bus to pound town.
 
I ain't even going to lie. That woman was my max lift. After trying to hold her up with my arms and catching a cramp in my hamstring. After 20 minutes and I think I'm being really generous with myself with the time. I was at total muscle failure, LOL.
 
I read the post and I instantly thought of this:

 
One of the funniest posts I have read in some time. You have a gift for
writing. It made my day (glad I am married).

And the response's ain't bad also :)
 

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