Anger Management:Controlling rage and temper

[Hmmm]

Exactly what is she wearing or how does she act when other men are around that would make a guy think it's ok to stick their hand up her dress???? Somethings missing here! I've never seen a woman go out in public and act like a lady should and a guy simply walked up and stuck their hand under her dress! Unless you're at a drunk bar or something? Sounds like you let things happen and go too far then when a guy wants your girl it's a NO NO! Might be a bit of your rage problem righ there. Also, sounds like your girls has some issues as well. You want to walk thru the doorway after an argument so she stops you by slapping your face??? Did I read that right? Sounds like the two of you are sending bad signals back and forth to each other. And the kids are stuck in the middle. You both need to go seek some counseling. For the sake of the kids. Good luck man.

No, no mixed signals are being sent by her. She does dress a little skimpy, she has a nice figure and what not (my avatar). Realistically its not anything you all havent seen, her style of dress that is., Have you ever been to a nightclub in a major metropolitan area? Its quite common for girls to get grabbed, hell I cought a guy trying to roofy a girl, well he had already done it but was trying to get her out of the place. Anyways, guys will hit on her, its something I accept, they will see me holding her hand and the second I walk away to goto the bathroom they try. She politely declines, and usually thats that. Its really not a concern and shes never demonstrated anything but class in that manner.

As for the fighting, she was actually trying to grab my shoulders, and I moved her hands to walk by and in trying to grab the again she whacked me in the face. Its not a common occurance. As for children, we dont have any, I was just stating that for the future, we plan to have them In a few years.

All in all we have a awesome relationship, like everyone else we have our problems. Anger is one of mine, Im trying to better myself though.

 

[Hmmm]

Sometimes it takes an eye-opener to change your life. Getting fired, getting left by your girl, getting sick, etc. Or you can imagine the consequence and avoid it. I'd do the second one.

Behavioral therapy is good if you really need help. Change your actions, how you react and have a protocol that you follow no matter what. Eventally, your mind will follow, it just won't seem important. But changing your actions is the important thing. The thing that keeps you out of jail.

Remember, volatility is weakness. It's not the strength it seems to be. YOU control yourself and let no one else. There is the power. If there ever is a need to wreck someone, it comes as a decision, like dis-assembling a machine. It's better that way, you can stop when you want.

This is what really got me thinking. I thought what if she did actually leave me, in the end, even though she started the argument that led to me flipping out, ultimately Im responsible for how I reacted.

Remember, volatility is weakness. It's not the strength it seems to be. YOU control yourself and let no one else. There is the power. If there ever is a need to wreck someone, it comes as a decision, like dis-assembling a machine. It's better that way, you can stop when you want.


I really like this

 

[petersouth]

Hate to say it but most of your problems seem to stem from the girl. She laid hands on you first so she's the abuser. Then she tells you you need to work on your anger. Bullshit.

She also solicits attention, something not right there with the hand up the dress and then afraid to tell you. Don't take what a woman says at face value, they are all bullshitters. You doubt me but what are you doing in pickup joints if you are a couple? Her idea or yours? Just another way to introduce drama into your life and she gets the ego boost. Wait till valentines day and DTB.

Forget kids, they're over rated and when she finally does leave you she'll take them and the house and she'll teach them to hate you while she shacks up with some bum and you get to pay for it. Then you'll really have some anger issues, OJ type anger issues.

 

[Cerberus777]

I had this issue till the end of my 20's. You have to realize that you are not just angry at a certain situation. It's everything/everyone your angry at taking the punishment. You need to forgive the ones who hurt you in the past.(I didn't say trust them again) im Christian and heavily Buddist influence. Find your path to peace and forgiveness, this is for you not them.

Holding on to anger is like drinking poison and wanting the other person to die.-Budda

 

[lntense]

I still have yet to run a proper aas cycle and I have the worst temper already. I get in a blackout mode. I think ill be able to control it better once im on as weird as it sounds. Because i dont want the whole "roid rage" bullshit to ever have any truth to the general public.

 

[chrisotpherm]

When I came back from my first deployment which was during the second wave of the invasion I came back with a lot of anger and often flew off the handle with the smallest look or challenge from anyone. We were made to be animals and brought back to be riding ponies, just didn't work. I struggle with this for about two months and wife convinced me to go to church and peace finally came. Don't get me wrong still to thus day you say something crazy I won't say a word but knock them out.

 

[getbig12]

i can relate but i got tired of looking like a jackass when i showed out... man it seems impossible but just try to controll yourself when u feel yourself about to have an outburst just try to think if its really worth it or if u should let the little shit go save your energy for the bigger problems

 

[iintensity]

Before speaking think about the situation at hand and if what your about to say will cause a negative impact. It took me a while to figure this out but you are in total control of the situation. Always think befor you speak, I know its hard when your angry.

 

[jaltb4k]

Yes, sometimes when it comes to that physical aspect of it, I lose sight of what I may do to them, or even what they may do to me. Im not going to say Im some badass, but I handle myself well. A little bit back I got into it with 3 guys, who while walking opposite directions down a street one of them decided to grab her upper leg. I didnt see it, but she told me 20 seconds later. I went racing down the street and luckily they were pussies and just basically all watched me beat them up one by one instead of teaming me. No matter how good you are with your hands though, a knife or gun while win. She fears it more than I do, after the fact I always realize what stupid situations I put myself in. Eventually I wont be so lucky

i worked as a bouncer at a night club for about 5yrs. what i learned from that was my anger was mostly a lack of self confidence issue. my desire to "show" everyone how much of a badass i was..... wore off after about 2yrs. i realized 2 important things. first of all........now matter how much of a badass i was or thought i was......there is ALWAYS someone bigger badder and stronger. second thing that i realized was that......i didnt have to prove myself to ANYONE except myself. 10 years later...i have a family,children etc... and choose to focus on whats REALLY important to me.i think it was a lot of maturity as well. a real badass........dosnt need anyone to know.he is confident,cool and collected. IMHO

 

[jaltb4k]

i agree with ehrans post as well...... anger is a VERY powerful tool if you are in control of it. if not.....its what makes less powerful.

 

[DerrickRigg]

I keep my aggression for the gym and the bedroom. It's controllable.

 

[Vidocq29]

I have a high school friend starting his 14th year in prison because he got in a bar fight and it carried outside, and he knocked the guy down, their head summarily hitting the back of a curb and busting open, and later dying.

I think about that before I get carried away.

 

[Archer]

Good for you guys using the search feature and reviving old threads lol

I go in the car or anywhere and yell "fuck!", really, really loud if I'm getting a bit too aggravated...and dammit it works!!

 

[ericraven2003]

Anger is weakness. If you cant control it, then there is something broke in you. We all have shit. Our childhood, insecurities, etc. A man is in control. Being a tough guy isnt what makes life worth living. Its what ruins it.

 

[280]

You need to leave the woman your with but you will not till she really screws you over. Women and men are different, your both allowed to have feelings. you stated "she screamed at me afterwards that she cant have kids in a house with a man that can act like that.". I would have left that day. It amazes me how Much disrepect you guys take. I had a friend who had his wife talk to him like that, I told him to leave he did not. She cheated on him then left him. Be a strong man both you and girl will be happier. Does she want a man or a mouse. A man will get angry a mouse will be timid.

 

[raw33man]

Roid RAGE DOES NOT fucking eixsssst mann, don't you fucking get it or what??????????????????????????? STOP BLAMING IT on the ROIDS MOTHER FUCKERS

 

[280]

I would say roid anger does exist. Its the chemistry of the body. There are chemicals given to millions everyday to alter there mood and or feelings. Take all the testosterone out of s msn and give him esrogen will his personalllity not change.

 

[lucky1]

You need to grow up.


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[biglizard225]

My personal feeling is that acting out because of this so-called "rage" and "anger" is a bunch of immature bullshit. I dealt with issues like this when I was very young and was in counseling for quite some time for it. I realized that acting this was was going to get me nowhere in life, and I realized how it made me look in the eyes of others. Sure, there is a time and place for physical altercation, but ONLY if your life is on the line. Otherwise, it's just not worth it from a personal or legal standpoint.

Exactly.. Took the words out of my mouth but I was just gonna say try growing up a little. Immature bull shit like this will cause you to lose loved ones and friends. It's not worth it, and if taking gear just controls you that much than you shouldn't take it. Trust you don't want to be that guy who has no friends or girlfriend because you hurt someone or you can't control your little sissy temper.

 

[dragonfire101]

Loosing your anger on a regular basis is one thing, but regardless of how much someone learns to control their behavior in therapy, groups or someone who is just naturally calm the right ingredients at the right time can make the most calm and sane person snap. I have seen this happen. Its just does unfortunately, but hopefully most us go through life never having it happen.

I seen messed up shit that make someone snap and try kill other people. I seen 70 year old grandfather go after and try kill the stepfather of his grandchild because he sexually assaulted her. I seen dudes snap when they find out wife cheating with someone and the kids home while its going on. There are some things that you hope you never have to face because restraining yourself may be very challenging.