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Anxiety and sad probably after loosing muscle

Psychophysique

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Joined
Jun 17, 2022
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Hi everyone, not new to the forum been following since 8 years but posting this time. I am 26 years old been lifting since I was 16 , when i was in high school i was very thin and shy guy ,having social anxiety all the time. So I joined gym and improved my physique which in turn improve my life and the anxiety . So at the age of 19-20 i started my first cycle after that till covid i was on and off gear doing blood test and every thing , after that my mba got completed got a job which i had to leave because of deaths of 2 of my family members during covid . So i had to stay at my parents house and look after them. No problem regarding the job because i got many offers but i am not joining because i had to look after my family at this point , I am home for like 7-8 months drinking not going to the gym ,all the gains that I made lost , now that i have stopped drinking and did the blood work again everything is as it was after after the last pct ,test is like 430 at this point no anxiety due to harmone, what's bothering me is that all the anxiety that i experienced when i was thin and small started to kick in and that too so severe i cannot move out of the house , I can go to the gym ,take gear, look good again, life will continue as normal but will this happen every time, cause eventually everything has to be stopped later at some point. Also there will be many time i couldn't keep that muscle .my question is Will this happen everytime and do you guys experience it .the low confidence and anxiety you feel like someone ripped the level 3 armour from you body , like you were a queen and all your jewellery got robbed , how you guys cope up with that?
That's stopping me from using gear but without it i am not gaining the confidence i need to face the world or myself, i feel weak. Low self esteem everything.
 
Hi everyone, not new to the forum been following since 8 years but posting this time. I am 26 years old been lifting since I was 16 , when i was in high school i was very thin and shy guy ,having social anxiety all the time. So I joined gym and improved my physique which in turn improve my life and the anxiety . So at the age of 19-20 i started my first cycle after that till covid i was on and off gear doing blood test and every thing , after that my mba got completed got a job which i had to leave because of deaths of 2 of my family members during covid . So i had to stay at my parents house and look after them. No problem regarding the job because i got many offers but i am not joining because i had to look after my family at this point , I am home for like 7-8 months drinking not going to the gym ,all the gains that I made lost , now that i have stopped drinking and did the blood work again everything is as it was after after the last pct ,test is like 430 at this point no anxiety due to harmone, what's bothering me is that all the anxiety that i experienced when i was thin and small started to kick in and that too so severe i cannot move out of the house , I can go to the gym ,take gear, look good again, life will continue as normal but will this happen every time, cause eventually everything has to be stopped later at some point. Also there will be many time i couldn't keep that muscle .my question is Will this happen everytime and do you guys experience it .the low confidence and anxiety you feel like someone ripped the level 3 armour from you body , like you were a queen and all your jewellery got robbed , how you guys cope up with that?
That's stopping me from using gear but without it i am not gaining the confidence i need to face the world or myself, i feel weak. Low self esteem everything.
No, this doesn't have to be an endless cycle of anxiety, depression, anxiety again. First, if you had muscle, you can get it back so it's not lost totally. The other thing is that as you get older, things that once worried you, won't seem to as much. There is help available in the form of doctors that are almost entirely successful. So I can't predict the future but can say with complete confidence that if you want to leave the anxiety and sadness behind, you certainly can. It just takes some effort. Not to mention, at 26, those can be stressful years.

You're deciding, right now, who you're going to be for the rest of your life. It's a lot of pressure. It's a right of passage and many of us here have gone through it.
 
Yay ! Maybe I am thinking too much , watching all my friends being confident and body positive without muscle , I, on the other hand putting muscle before work . Maybe it's the way I am ,since i have been like 5'6 190 pounds all these years now down to 130 , I just feel small .

Some of my old pics
 

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Yay ! Maybe I am thinking too much , watching all my friends being confident and body positive without muscle , I, on the other hand putting muscle before work . Maybe it's the way I am ,since i have been like 5'6 190 pounds all these years now down to 130 , I just feel small .

Some of my old pics
Left before?
Right is now?
 
Thank you guys for responding. Started again now everything is going good , started off with 175 tren 175 mast 325 test . It's just that all these years(8) being big, you don't feel like yourself when you go back to normal . P. S i have been big and i have been small & i choose big every fuckin time 💪💪haha.
 
No worries my friend! You are young and healthy! Just be smart about the gear use. Just keep working out. Everything in moderation (especially partying lol)
 
When you get into your late 30's and early 40's, you will find it easier to hold on to muscle with just trt dosages and with a respectable body fat. You may not be as big and lean as when on cycle but close to it and with an impressive look. You just have to keep training and eating right.
 

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