Busted

kandaandm · Dec 15, 2004

So what do you guys think?.....I've been working out for 17 years or so....for the past 5 years I've been off and on cycles.....Well....I've been with my girl for about 5 1/2 years...married for 1 1/2 of those.....She knows that I've done steroids in the past....I know she doesn't agree with using steroids at all.....I've done a few cycles since we've gotten married...and have kept it from her. Well.....she found my gear the other night.....and now she wants a divorce.....I know I was playing with fire the whole time....but it sure does suck.

Steak Helmet · Dec 15, 2004

For her to divorce you over that is pretty stupid. To toss all those good years out the door for one thing is not the best choice she can make. She is probably pissed because you hid it from her, so she thinks you are hiding other things. Just let her know that you will stop and not touch it unless it is brought up to her first.

Armageddon · Dec 15, 2004

if she wants out for something as petty as that then tell her to kick rocks. that's bullshit! educate her to the situation and let her know things are ok. it's not that big of a deal
here's were i have a problem and i'm sure this is wy she's so pissed. you lied to her. don't hide it from her especially if your married, help her to accept it. she doesn't have to like it, but she can deal with it.
on another note I first thought this was about someone getting popped by the po po, but it's worse lol

ELIMINATOR · Dec 16, 2004

That is harsh. Maybe she is looking for a way out and this is it.

big_byrd52 · Dec 16, 2004

that sucks bro. if she is worried about the legality of it then get a script and show her. if u dont have a temper then explain that u have never lost ur temper and had a roid rage

so there is nothing to worry about with that. seems like she is throwing away alot for very little.

MikeS · Dec 16, 2004

You know its hard to know how to handle the juice situation with a wife/gf.
You tell the truth-it can backfire. You lie and get caught-hell to pay!
Hopefully you can talk some sense to her-good luck my friend.
Maybe best thing is to admit it, but then keep it distant.

My wife used to be very supportive, then it became a big issue as our relation progressed.

vitor · Dec 16, 2004

I agree with the guys, Maybe this is her first reaction to someone who knows nothing injectable drugs are kinda scary, she might put them up their with heroin, etc, explain to her, what they are, what they do, how you not some druggie, and if she is your true love, ask her if you gave them up for good would she stay with you.

How are things in the relationship, everything kosher and going well, or has there been turmoil?

Nemesis79 · Dec 16, 2004

u scared the shit out of me..i thought the man busted u...well women are a dime a dozen..i know that sounds superficial...I am a romantic guy but if she's' going to be dumb like that good riddance she's supposed to like you for your heart and not your gear...

Mr.Huge · Dec 16, 2004

my $.02

First of all you need to apologize to her for not being straight with her to begin with. Admit you were wrong for keeping it from her you shouldnt have to hide anything from your wife. If you marry a person its because you love them with all your heart. That person should be your best friend. Someone who will stand by you no matter what you believe in even if they have different views.

A relationship is built on trust and communication between one another. Working together to get through the rough and tough times.

Next you need to make a decision and this decision should not be based on her feelings alone for you will live miserably if you try to make her happy without coming to a agreeing point.

Are you willing to quit using a/s to salvage your marriage? Is it really something you have to stop doing to salvage your marriage? ALTHOUGH IT MAY NOT SEEM LIKE THE BIGGEST DEAL TO YOU TO HER IT MAY BE.

Do you have to quit using to salvage your marriage? Are there other problems with your marriage other then this that have led her to want to call it quits?

So now after you ask yourself these questions we are back to the key element in a relationship. "COMMUNICATION" you must both sit down and talk freely without getting upset at one another like adults and try to come to terms. If you can not agree to disagree or simply work together either by educating her and letting her understand why you use and how you benefit from its use. If you can not find a way to do this then maybe you to should also look at yourself and ask your own self why am i using? I can even explain it to my self let along my wife? DO i really need to be using? Is this really for me?

Do you truly love this woman? Does she truly love you? Were you really meant to be with one another? If you were then you should be able to talk to one another about everything and anything that comes before you.

Is she worth more than this to me? You then need to you need to make a committment to one another and one you can keep. You need to be able to talk to one another openly and freely about anything and everything onnce again. No broken promises... broken promises bring blemishes and in the end all will self destruct.

Good luck my friend... I hate to see another marriage end over poor communication and true meaning of loving one another. Best of wishes to you....

Mr.Huge

Crowler · Dec 16, 2004

I always tell my wife she is the BEST in the world but she thinks I am just saying that.

She tells me that she WANTS me back on lol

Like I say she IS the best in the world.

Nemesis79 · Dec 16, 2004

also like the other iron brothers are saying..it's tough either way..from my past exp. i know if your lie ur in shit..if u tell the truth ur in shit...very seldomly you find a girl that's like oh u didnt' lie..wow...good luck to ya keep us posted ...you'll be fine..i think she's just freakin out if she's not than bad on her.

Armageddon · Dec 16, 2004

In the past I had good luck with it. Most asked to stay on as they got thrashed regularly and I was lean and big and they liked it. I had one that didn't mind although she'd prefer that I was as we thought we'd be together awhile, then it came down to she just didn't want me freaking out on her and having a "roidrage". She said first sign of that and were done. So all in all everythings been cool.

gravityfighter · Dec 16, 2004

Crowler said:
I always tell my wife she is the BEST in the world but she thinks I am just saying that.

She tells me that she WANTS me back on lol

Like I say she IS the best in the world.

I told mine the other day "I did'nt know what happiness was till I met you" she did'nt know whether to kiss me or hit me!

gravityfighter · Dec 16, 2004

Seriously, I'm lucky, the wifey competes , so no problem in that dept.
GF

Sigmund Roid · Dec 17, 2004

I believe MikeS. said it correctly in his post.

One must be careful about who he marries. Even then people are human and can betray a trust or change their opinions. Being 'pro-hormone myself' I know first hand what a dilemma this subject is. If you are honest, the person can turn on you later if the relationship sours. If you decide to keep that part of your life private it can bite you later if they find out, as your spouse has. Their is no easy answer. Like Eliminator said, possibly she is looking for an excuse to end the marriage? I'd like some additional imput. What is her main issue with your steroid use? The threat to end the relationship seems rather harsh considering that you've been together for so long. Have you been a good mate thus far? Has the relationship been harmonious up to now? What are the other issues if any?

Thanks for posting!

mike1107 · Jan 9, 2005

mate, did you explain her it has nothing in common with drugs like cocain, heroine .. ?

if she wsants a divorce for that bro, there must be something under .. just my .02.

I hope everything will get better for you, try to take time and explaine her what do you use it for

TRAPS21 · Jan 10, 2005

I had the same situation, not the harsh reaction. My wife found out when I went for a check up about a litle gyno. I had to come clean and tell her. Needless to say it wasd very quiet around my house for a couple days after that. Every time I tried to bring it up she would get upset, like many of you have said and say that I was probably hiding other things too. I finally was able to calm her down and explin to her what it is that I was doing. She still doesn't like it but she said that as long as I don't flash it in front of her she will dismiss it. The way I explained it was that everyone has their own ways of taking care of their bodies. We al want to look better, wheteher that be for ourselves or someone else. I explained that by doing aas I was trying to better myself and look better physically. Then I put it in perspective of how she takes aerobics and pallattes (sp?) and does an hour workout everyday on top of that other shit. I said that we are trying for the best it is just that what I was doing happened to be illegal. That brought another question. What would happen if I got caught. I really was not sure other than it is a fine and a slap on the wrist if found with small dosages. I had her do a little research and she actually looked on this board to help educate herself. She still does not agree with it but we have found that if she does not ask questioins about my training then I cannot ask questions about the classes she is taking and I just have to stay supportive. That is my story and if it can help anyone, GREAT.

T

GerryT · Jan 10, 2005

Sounds like the main issue is the hiding and covering up. That is one thing my late wife could not tolerate. We had an argument once about something
I unintentionally hid from her. We talked it out and after that, it was no secrets the rest of the way.

One thing you have to ask yourselves is: would my life be better or worse without my spouse? Sounds like you have a marriage worth saving and you need to do what it takes to save it. If you can't talk it out between the two of you, then try a counsellor.

Explain the situation to her. If you are not competing, do you need to continue cycling? If you are competing and need to, then she needs to understand what you are doing.

Hope you decide to stay together and hope this helps a little. Good luck.

kandaandm · Feb 7, 2005

well....I figured I'd respond to all of you and thank you for your help....It turns out I had talked to my wife quite a bit about it.....and a few days after my post she was alright with it.....she even gave my stuff back and let me finish my cycle and PCT.....She was just extremely pissed I had kept this from her.............thanks