can we be NORMAL?

[phatkid77]

Constant nagging from my wife has me thinking. Other than dieting for a show, can one have a off season where you sit down at every meal with the family and NOT about weighing your foods and still be in great shape?
Only eating 3 or 4 times a day, ect ect
Thanks

 

[buselmo]

you can be inshape eating 2-3 meals per day. just adjust your training and calorie consumption by how you look in the mirror. and make sure you eat "healthy" food ... Most bodybuilders get fat in the offseason when they eat "like normal people" because they eat:
IHOP for breakfast
snack at ben and jerry's
lunch at mcdonald's (a value meal, extra burger, 20 piece mcnuggets and a mcflurry)
snack again with chocolates and other shit
then have a big dinner at home (double the serving of a normal person)

and that's why they get out of shape... just eat regular portions and don't get too full... it works.

much easier to maintain than to get there.

 

[Thor]

I dont compete

Constant nagging from my wife has me thinking. Other than dieting for a show, can one have a off season where you sit down at every meal with the family and NOT about weighing your foods and still be in great shape?
Only eating 3 or 4 times a day, ect ect
Thanks

but do like to get very lean during the summer months, so I eat whatever I want (reasonable) from Halloween until about April 1st, then I add cardio and lower carbs and eliminate sugars and it works great. Been doing it like that for about 10 years. Who the hell wants to diet during the holidays, I eat cheesecake, pumpkin pie, cookies, etc. all winter and only gain about 15lbs.

 

[doug1]

what's the nagging over exactly? i don't compete but i do have a pretty good level of dedication and have been married for over 14 years and two children. now lets face it, bb is a pretty selfish endeavor. now that you have these commitments there must be some type of balance and compromise, chances are you dont have the genetics to become the next mr olympia so to try and live the lifestyle of a professional would be foolish and silly as those who love you would certainly suffer.try and involve the wife in the training, thats what i do, this way you can complete the full amount of volume you are looking for without ruffling feathers. most women love cardio so she can put in time there while you get your necessary volume. i purchased equipment for the house over the years so i can do all my training at home, this helps a lot with at least "being around."
now when it comes to the dieting, if you are telling her that you guys can't order a pizza on friday night or go out for a nice dinner because of "your bodybuilding" then she is totally justified, if you want to eat rice cakes and oatmeal on friday night and be the martyr, fine, but don't subject the family to that bullshit, its not right.

 

[phatkid77]

Basically thinks I'm gunna corupt our 1yr olds eating habits, we never eat together, and of course always at the gym. And no I don't say they can't have something, she hates that I eat what I eat. Some good advice however. I want her to go to gym with me but she always tired, and our work schedules are screwy

Phats

 

[doug1]

Basically thinks I'm gunna corupt our 1yr olds eating habits, we never eat together, and of course always at the gym. And no I don't say they can't have something, she hates that I eat what I eat. Some good advice however. I want her to go to gym with me but she always tired, and our work schedules are screwy

Phats

how long married and what is her physical condition?

 

[doug1]

she may not like what you eat if she herself has some fat to lose, she is aggravated by your discipline, it makes her feel guilty that she doesn't have the same. she may even think that you are working on your body in order to find someone better, someone who looks more like one of the regulars at the gym.

 

[doug1]

its not about the one year old, that's a smoke screen.

 

[phatkid77]

Been married 3 yrs, together 11, she's hippy, but 6,2", and 165lbs

 

[phatkid77]

I agree doug. My question is kinda answered, once I do the hard work of getting where I want to be, its easier to maintain then achieve

 

[doug1]

if she doesn't look like a fitness model in the magazine she will feel threatened by other women at gym. if you have the room in your house consider starting to accumulate equipment. the marriage is still new and she will have insecurity issues. my wife and i have a great relationship and i know for a fact she would not be comfortable with me going off to a gym a few nights a week without her around, this would put a strain on things that is not worth it. my advice would be if she does not go with you, then its not worth it, the nagging is not worth it. you'd be surprised how good of workouts you can get in with just a bench and a good asst. or dumbells and using your imagination, legs for example you can do squats by holding dumbells and going down, you can do lunges, you can do "step ups" on the bench, you can do sissy squats, you can run sprints outside. takes some imagination, but its better in the long run, divorce is expensive and children are negatively effected by it. don't be that poor bastard who is in the gym on a sunday afternoon because his wife couldn't handle his training and now he's got no money and no girlfriend because he's paying child support and cant even afford to take someone out on a date, that his kids probably wont like anyway.

 

[doug1]

I agree doug. My question is kinda answered, once I do the hard work of getting where I want to be, its easier to maintain then achieve

this is true, but who is ever where they really want to be?
will the process be hastened by the energy of a commercial gym and all the equipment which hits the muscles at all the various angles? yes of course, but you can make progress without all that too depending on your wallet and square footage of where you live. i had stuff outside for while and i live in florida where it can get brutally hot, i work lawn care and would come home after working all day and do my thing, gotta drink a lot of water.

 

[mr. boom]

exacly what I've been going through

This is the same crap I've been going through latley and it sucks. It is kinda my fault though. One thing I cna tell you is if your wife does not go to the gym with you and you want to stay married then don't offer to help another female in the gym and not tell your wife. I'm verry lucky to still be married right now because of that.. It's not worth it... In the 12 years I've been going to the gym 3 of them with my wife I have never trained a female one on one. Ofcourse I always give advice but the one time I did (not too long ago) shit hit the fan at my house. It made me realize how much I had and what I could lose. I'm back on track now but boy it has sucked. I would not want my wife going to the gym at all without me so atleast I can still go..What gets me is my wife could be a super model if she wanted too. She is awsome...Bodybuilding is a selfish sport but you got to be able to spend time with your family and if possible have another hobby to even things out. For me it;s my car.. So my last words are if your married make sure you have your prioriteis in line. I wish you all the best.

Curt

 

[Pekkerwood]

Phat:

I feel your pain. My gf of 7 years just has a different view of food. It does make it difficult at times when I have the chicken breasts in the fridge for grilling and I will come home and they will be already cooked in a butter, wine sauce with mushrooms and cheese on top. I give in much more than I should for harmony. I do however, after a period of time, see her following my diet more. She just will not "admit" to it.

 

[lilarnold]

Basically thinks I'm gunna corupt our 1yr olds eating habits, we never eat together, and of course always at the gym. And no I don't say they can't have something, she hates that I eat what I eat. Some good advice however. I want her to go to gym with me but she always tired, and our work schedules are screwy

Phats

i have a 1 1/2 year old........we eat together but different things.......my wife?....i have no clue what she eats!

 

[jfunk316]

I'm not married like a lot of you guys but I have lost a few serious relationships either because of my dedication to the gym and eating or because they were just not into fitness. I have always been against dating at my gym because I know everyone and I think it could turn bad quickly if I did but at the same time I really don't think dating someone who is not into fitness will ever work for me. There are a lot of things that I like to eat and do because I enjoy being healthy, I'm not at the gym to be the biggest guy or try to become a pro. I don't eat that way either, however, when your with someone that's not into eating clean and healthy it makes it hard to be together. So Phats I can see where that would be a problem in the relationship at your level, for sure!

 

[tkav1980]

Its actually kind of hard for me to understand some of the stuff im reading. My girl just eats whatever i cook, so my diet is her diet...slightly smaller portions though...lol....and as for the gym if i want to go twice a day for 3 weeks straight i never hear one complaint. every once in a while if we havent had a day off together in a month or so shell ask me to skip a day to hang out, which i always oblige, one extra day off in a month doesnt seem to hurt.
i cant understand why someone would complain about you eating healthy, and training.

 

[Phidias]

I have always been against dating at my gym because I know everyone and I think it could turn bad quickly if I did

You don't realize how right you are here!

Never drop a girl you met at the gym while you're still a member there, cause believe me it won't take more than a week to all the other ladies to know everything about your rather pathetic sexual performances... lol!

Just when you thought you were Casanova!

i cant understand why someone would complain about you eating healthy, and training.

Cause too often it becomes an obsession that leaves no room for "normal" enjoyable things in life.

 

[thebrick]

define NORMAL for me. Personally, I think "normal" is a myth.

 

[jfunk316]

You don't realize how right you are here!

Never drop a girl you met at the gym while you're still a member there, cause believe me it won't take more than a week to all the other ladies to know everything about your rather pathetic sexual performances... lol!

Just when you thought you were Casanova!

That's what scares me is we break up and I have to see her at the gym, knowing she is saying I'm a "no good, dirty, blah, blah, blah" all while i'm trying to get a workout in.

That's the last thing I need is more ladies bad mouthing my sexual performance.