Could there be a subconscious desire to die when we juice up?

[Kaiser]

OTH, I told you you'd love this one

 

[OuchThatHurts]

Just doin' the job brother...

Someone's gotta come help you ladies out...

 

[thebrick]

Women are masters and quite intuitive at noticing what's on the inside. And if they percieve insecurity, they'll smell the blood in the water from a mile away. When you become comfortable with yourself as you are and THEN put on some nice clothes and go out with confidence, girls will come TO YOU.

Anabolic Beast... memorize these words. They are worth their weight in gold.

 

[Anabolic_Beast]

Whoaaaaa..... Hold on tiger. TP4U is a great dude and you should enjoy life and that includes women but... Getting a few notches is the old gunbelt is not going to be the fix-all you're looking for either. You could be just trading one obsession (lifting, gear, etc.) for another (women). The moments of pleasure you feel from a good romp in the hay might make you feel good for a day or two, but that's as far as that goes. In your current state you also risk the possibility of getting shot down by even the biggest skank in the bar and then going home feeling worse than ever. Women are masters and quite intuitive at noticing what's on the inside. And if they percieve insecurity, they'll smell the blood in the water from a mile away. When you become comfortable with yourself as you are and THEN put on some nice clothes and go out with confidence, girls will come TO YOU. If they don't at least they'll be willing to listen and talk.

It's important for you to realize that getting yourself laid once or even a hundred times is just as fleeting a fix as BBing, gear, plastic surgery, on and on. Don't you think that if you're straight up and strong on the inside that it won't spill over onto the outside? Then you can add that training and get your routine and diet down and then way, way, way down the road when you stop growing, consider enhancing your routine with some supps. Stick to the important things that are more meaningful and lasting and not the superficial things that practically change with the tides.

Point very well taken. That is the problem of me, I am rotting on the inside...I barely have any confidence at all...in my looks, my body and slight gut, my moderate acne, my accent, my behavior, my lack of friends, everything...I just dont have confidence bro!!! This is why I want to go on a test cycle for the entire summer...if there is something that will jack up my confidence levels, and keep the depression at bay, IT IS TESTOSTERONE! We all know this! also, alcohol does slash away inhibitions I have, and from my personal experience, I have 2 choices on a partynight...I can be myself, which is the introverted, shy, back-of-the-bar John staring down every hot girl and saying nothing and going home alone, or 2. I can drink a shitload of beer, get ripped, and hot on every girl I see, thinking from the effects of the alcohol that I am the hottest guy alive, and take my chances...
Do you have any ideas on how I can boost my confidence without relying on exogenous substances such as test and alcohol? A good haircut? Nice clothes? Or do I have to change my perception of myself? And how do I do that??? This is where I need direction...on changing myself for good, and having confidence!!!
I wear hearing aids, and it is visible from all angles...is that a problem for women??? I have asked many of those girls if it bothers em, they say no, but deep inside I think it does since women look for guys on the top of the gene pool to fuck u kno???

 

[OuchThatHurts]

Point very well taken. That is the problem of me, I am rotting on the inside...I barely have any confidence at all...in my looks, my body and slight gut, my moderate acne, my accent, my behavior, my lack of friends, everything...I just dont have confidence bro!!! This is why I want to go on a test cycle for the entire summer...if there is something that will jack up my confidence levels, and keep the depression at bay, IT IS TESTOSTERONE! We all know this! also, alcohol does slash away inhibitions I have, and from my personal experience, I have 2 choices on a partynight...I can be myself, which is the introverted, shy, back-of-the-bar John staring down every hot girl and saying nothing and going home alone, or 2. I can drink a shitload of beer, get ripped, and hot on every girl I see, thinking from the effects of the alcohol that I am the hottest guy alive, and take my chances...
Do you have any ideas on how I can boost my confidence without relying on exogenous substances such as test and alcohol? A good haircut? Nice clothes? Or do I have to change my perception of myself? And how do I do that??? This is where I need direction...on changing myself for good, and having confidence!!!
I wear hearing aids, and it is visible from all angles...is that a problem for women??? I have asked many of those girls if it bothers em, they say no, but deep inside I think it does since women look for guys on the top of the gene pool to fuck u kno???

You know what? Like I said before. You need to see someone. Talk to someone face to face. You have a lot going on there. Definitely find a professional in your area and get into a weekly or semi-weekly program. If for nothing else than to talk to a human being about all this. You need to change your perceptions about yourself. It takes time and effort.

Sorry if that seems like canned advice "Go see someone" but I highly doubt you'll find what you need online. What you can communicate in person in 20 minutes, takes an hour online.