I needed a couple days. I hope you guys will allow me to share my thoughts. Fouad, myself, Andrew Berry, Chris Edmonds and Scott Mcnally got together in a group to start the gofundme....but we wanted to wait for Mary's blessing first and make sure Mary was in charge and setup the gofundme. Andrew contacted Mary but before she could get back to him we saw that this gofundme was setup in johns behalf (which is more than fine).
I just wanted to share my thoughts if I may. John and i go back about 15 years. (As you guys probably know I make most of his supplements) and we have just talked alot and texted over the last decade and a half. As Bboy and some of these other guys can attest to....he was a great guy, he had honor and he just was such a good person.
This is the part I have trouble with and has caused me to weep more as a grown man over the last few days than I have ever in my life. He loved those boys. They were his world! ( I am having trouble writing this right now) .....they meant everything to him. And John Meadows their dad was their hero. And it just freaking crushes me that he is taken away from the boys at an age and a time in their lives that they most need him. It just seems so unfair.
When John had the heart attack and two clots in his heart over a year ago, we talked thoroughly about the anxiety it had given him and what he was going through at that time. He had done a lot of nolvadex before his heart attack and i implored him to not do that anymore and a gamut of other stuff. Guys....John sent me every single bit of his bloodwork since that time for me to go over and give him my thoughts. Besides his kidneys being a little down (a little), everything else was stellar, he had nothing off except his estrogen was a little bit high one time (little bit).... Lipids beyond stellar, hematocrit, hemoglobin, everything else was stellar. I went thru his bloodwork again the other day because I was like "Dante did you miss something?!".....and I didnt. I do chastise myself for one thing. John was going to Dr Serranno and cardiac experts and I didnt want to throw too much at him at one time because as you guys can probably understand 'He had a lot of anxiety about the heart attack at that time'.....I wrote it down at the time but I never followed up with it and i wish i did. I wanted him to get tested for the Factor V Leiden and Prothombin clotting disorders but I figured that the experts that he was seeing ( I would think no doubt ) would test him for those disorders.
The thing that just destroys me is I can hear his words to me on the phone when i went thru his first set of bloodwork after his heart attack, and we talked about his mindset and the anxiety of going down at that time and him being taken on the gurney in the ambulance.......and he was like "Dante thank you for always being there for me, I have to be around for my boys, they need me, they need their dad and I appreciate you going thru my bloodwork and talking about this stuff".......
Its just awful....Bboy I know how close you and him were.....I feel for you bro....its an incredible loss.
Its so important to me that the boys and Mary dont go forward from this point with worry and the unknown and I ask anyone that John has positively effected from this forum to maybe contribute to this
https://gofund.me/d06b90fa Its not the amount that matters, the smallest contribution adds to the total, and it would really help out the Meadows family's future.