- Joined
- Apr 2, 2016
- Messages
- 160
I have to preface by saying I faced a long history of PTSD and resulting anxiety as a young kid (not military, witnessed something) and due to that I'm relatively low-income and the docs my insurance provides are HORRIBLE at TRT, I'm talking 200mg shots every 4 weeks, no checking for e2 etc.... so I decided to take matters into my own hands about three years ago since my libido was very low, I did blood work and sure enough my test was at about mid 200's.
After tinkering and dialing in, 2016-2017 I finally felt amazing. Great energy, sex every night, libido on point, happy etc. This was with 200mg of Test E. and 500iu HCG split into two weekly shots, and research chemical exemestane at 6.25mg daily.
About a year ago I went through a divorce that just devastated me. I mean I was so down and out and for about two months just basically isolated myself. Around this time was also the whole research chemical ban, so I went ahead and ordered some actual exemestane from a very good sponsor here (same one I get my test from).
Well, after 3-4 months I started casually dating again. And BIG problem, I couldn't for the life of me get an erection. At first I thought maybe I'm just feeling guilty about moving on, but over and over again same thing. Started taking daily low-dose cialis AND a viagra beforehand and still, not even slightly hard.
I did a blood draw on just the 200mg test and HCG with no AI to determine a baseline. Came out great. At trough I was at 950 test and 30 e2.
I lowered too 100mg test and HCG (still, no AI) for the last 4 weeks to get a baseline at that level and also test my SHBG, I'm getting that today so we will see.
I'm just feeling SO down guys. I mean I still miss and love my ex, always will, but it's been a year and I'm over the actual breakup. I've met some beautiful, smart, interesting women that I've really had a great time with and when it comes time for sex, I can't perform.
Being logical about this, only two things changed. I went through a very tough breakup and my exemestane source changed from RC to a pill form from a very old, trusted sponsor here. I just can't see it being the breakup at this point. As a sidenote which I think is important, now that I've dropped to just 100mg of test, I still feel the same BUT I'm at least getting some nighttime erections that wake up, but when it coems to sex or even masturbating it's the same issue, I just go totally limp. Regardless, I still find that interesting.... maybe I do better on e2 much lower than 30, maybe I'm a low SHBG guy, who knows.
I don't know if anyone has any advice. After this blood test, which I'm mainly doing because I'm curious about my SHBG in relation to my e2, I just don't have the means to be getting regular hormonal bloodwork (proper, with sensitive e2, SHBG etc.). It just makes no sense, I was perfectly dialed in for over a year and then out of nowhere I can't even have sex.
Sorry so long and TMI but it happened again with like the 14th partner and I really don't think I can take any more embarrassing moments, this last one is a really good, quality lady too and it sucks that this will likely ruin it.
After tinkering and dialing in, 2016-2017 I finally felt amazing. Great energy, sex every night, libido on point, happy etc. This was with 200mg of Test E. and 500iu HCG split into two weekly shots, and research chemical exemestane at 6.25mg daily.
About a year ago I went through a divorce that just devastated me. I mean I was so down and out and for about two months just basically isolated myself. Around this time was also the whole research chemical ban, so I went ahead and ordered some actual exemestane from a very good sponsor here (same one I get my test from).
Well, after 3-4 months I started casually dating again. And BIG problem, I couldn't for the life of me get an erection. At first I thought maybe I'm just feeling guilty about moving on, but over and over again same thing. Started taking daily low-dose cialis AND a viagra beforehand and still, not even slightly hard.
I did a blood draw on just the 200mg test and HCG with no AI to determine a baseline. Came out great. At trough I was at 950 test and 30 e2.
I lowered too 100mg test and HCG (still, no AI) for the last 4 weeks to get a baseline at that level and also test my SHBG, I'm getting that today so we will see.
I'm just feeling SO down guys. I mean I still miss and love my ex, always will, but it's been a year and I'm over the actual breakup. I've met some beautiful, smart, interesting women that I've really had a great time with and when it comes time for sex, I can't perform.
Being logical about this, only two things changed. I went through a very tough breakup and my exemestane source changed from RC to a pill form from a very old, trusted sponsor here. I just can't see it being the breakup at this point. As a sidenote which I think is important, now that I've dropped to just 100mg of test, I still feel the same BUT I'm at least getting some nighttime erections that wake up, but when it coems to sex or even masturbating it's the same issue, I just go totally limp. Regardless, I still find that interesting.... maybe I do better on e2 much lower than 30, maybe I'm a low SHBG guy, who knows.
I don't know if anyone has any advice. After this blood test, which I'm mainly doing because I'm curious about my SHBG in relation to my e2, I just don't have the means to be getting regular hormonal bloodwork (proper, with sensitive e2, SHBG etc.). It just makes no sense, I was perfectly dialed in for over a year and then out of nowhere I can't even have sex.
Sorry so long and TMI but it happened again with like the 14th partner and I really don't think I can take any more embarrassing moments, this last one is a really good, quality lady too and it sucks that this will likely ruin it.
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