Divorce

[biggie260]

Hi, everyone

So, going through a divorce, was totally not expected, she just left in April after 20 years. My questions is this, I am still at the house and have been the only one that has ever made the mortgage payments on the house. She never did, but she is on the title. She of course want's "her half" On top of paying for the house, I made 52,000 in upgrades as well. my concern is with the market so crappy right now, I am at 2% interest on my mortgage and it would be insane to refi and go up to 6% plus add in the equity she wants to be bought out. So far things have been very nice and friendly, other then her just up and leaving me. People that have been through this or any financial people that can give me some advice. Ideally, I would like to settle on an amount with her, and just add it to the original loan I have now and just keep going. I have had the house appraised and we have like 200,000 in equity. thanks in advance.

 

[slesh]

Did you make the mortgage payments and renovations from a co-mingled bank account?

 

[biggie260]

Did you make the mortgage payments and renovations from a co-mingled bank account?

No, it was all from my own account.

 

[bbxtreme]

It depends on how much she wants. You have more leverage given you made the payments from your own money.

But it also depends on why you guys are divorcing, her income status, and what she will use against you in court if it comes to that. Which leads me to-

I would try to amicably find a number to settle on. The second you add litigators and go to court you both lose. Don’t piss away $100k in legal fees. Just be objective, level headed and fair. Easier said when done in your shoes, but nobody wins when emotion and litigators get involved.

Get a number and get it in writing as quickly as possible before she has time to shop it around.

 

[slesh]

No, it was all from my own account.

I would speak to an attorney but you may be in the clear. I put the down payment on my house before I got married and then paid for all the renovations from my own bank account so I didn’t have to give my ex shit when it came to the “marital home.”

 

[danieltx]

Get off Professional Muscle and get to a lawyer's office ASAP. Literally every minute you waste not doing that is potentially money down the drain. This shit varies so much state to state that whatever guys tell you may mean nothing in your state and I'm not aware of any family law lawyers who post on here that would be qualified to help.

 

[slesh]

PS I’m speaking purely on the house. I don’t know what state you live in but in Florida you owe the spouse half of your investment income. I had to give her half my 401k that was earned during our marriage. Again, see a lawyer.

 

[control]

Wait, are you trying to keep the house and continue living in it? I'd rather be homeless than live in the house I lived in with my ex...

 

[Fleezy]

I had to give her half my 401k

can i have the other half?

 

[Big A]

It does not matter that she did not contribute a cent financially. The court will look at the fact that she cleaned, maintained, helped run the house, and so on. And even if she didn't (if you had maids, etc), she contributed by being your spouse and mentally supporting you in earning an income that paid for the house. She is entitled to 50% in the eyes of the law.

 

[cage99]

Get an attorney ASAP!!! Trust me I got fucked royally in my divorce!!! I tried to take the civil route, but crazy bitches will do crazy shit!!! That busted cunt fucked my world up for a solid 2 years!!!! Do NOT trust your X!!!!!

Get an attorney and follow what they tell you to do! Where you get in trouble is when you try and be nice. Also, if you have children, and live in the south you will be raped by the courts! Been there and done that! I sincerely hope it works out for you!

Cage

 

[Big A]

Get an attorney ASAP!!! Trust me I got fucked royally in my divorce!!! I tried to take the civil route, but crazy bitches will do crazy shit!!! That busted cunt fucked my world up for a solid 2 years!!!! Do NOT trust your X!!!!!

Get an attorney and follow what they tell you to do! Where you get in trouble is when you try and be nice. Also, if you have children, and live in the south you will be raped by the courts! Been there and done that! I sincerely hope it works out for you!

Cage

Get the lawyer that knows everyone and only cares about his reputation. Because he will do everything he can to win. He cares more about that than what he'll bill you. Because he aspires one day to be a judge. That's the guy you want.

I got full custody of my two daughters and I did not have to pay the ex a single cent in assets or spousal maintenance.

 

[Fleezy]

get (paid) consultations with every lawyer in the state



she won't have anyone to go to lmao

 

[solarsentinel1]

Sorry for your circumstances, brother.

2 divorces here, and in both cases things were nice until they weren't anymore.

Please take Daniel's advice and get a good divorce attorney immediately. If things stay "nice"....great, tell your lawyer to be nice right back. If they take a turn for the worse, you are prepared with counsel that is YOUR ADVOCATE.

Also, while nothing wrong with bro support, remember, Divorce is in accordance with State or Commonwealth law, so you need a Divorce Attorney familiar with your local laws and licensed to practice in that geography. Even when people have all the best of intent in sharing their experiences with you.... the laws that governed their split may not be at all applicable to yours.

 

[Big A]

get (paid) consultations with every lawyer in the state



she won't have anyone to go to lmao

That's a great tip.
I did that exact same thing with the top 5 lawyers.

 

[Growthman]

I’m taking community property right now in my 3rd year of law school and got an A in family law over the summer as an elective. Did you buy the house before or after you got married?

 

[Growthman]

Just saw she’s on title. As such, the community is (generally) entitled to 50/50. Though there could be some exceptions depending…

Did you write a prenuptial agreement before entering into the marriage?

 

[gib68sg]

Going through this now! Shit sucks. Between divorce and custody battle I’m $45k in, and we’ve had one hearing, with no end in sight. Like others have said, get the fucking best lawyer you can. Good luck bro.

 

[Growthman]

Going through this now! Shit sucks. Between divorce and custody battle I’m $45k in, and we’ve had one hearing, with no end in sight. Like others have said, get the fucking best lawyer you can. Good luck bro.

Agree with this and many others above. Lawyer up.

PS sorry to hear about your/OP/anyone who’s endured a divorce. Easily one of the darkest times in a man’s life (been there).

 

[hawkmoon]

get (paid) consultations with every lawyer in the state



she won't have anyone to go to lmao

Tony Soprano approach