Divorce

[hawkmoon]

I got divorced once...thank the gods it was here in Japan.
I hope things work out for you, I'm sure it will take a lot to keep yourself together and steady.

 

[Growthman]

Here’s the outline I got from the 2022 Valedictorian of my law school. As someone mentioned above, different states/jurisdictions may have different nuances but this should help answer most of your questions while you shop for counsel

 

[biggie260]

I’m taking community property right now in my 3rd year of law school and got an A in family law over the summer as an elective. Did you buy the house before or after you got married?

bought it after, no prenup, we never shared any accounts. I paid all household stuff.

 

[Growthman]

bought it after, no prenup, we never shared any accounts. I paid all household stuff.

Right on, look at my post previous to this. The outline will answer most of your questions. Best of luck. Be prepared for a tough road ahead. Prayers for as smooth of a separation as possible. I can’t give you legal advice but feel free to reach out anytime bro.

 

[Growthman]

bought it after, no prenup, we never shared any accounts. I paid all household stuff.

I’ve come across several community property issues in law school, and I wanted to mention that while many of the principles I’ve studied may apply to your situation, it’s important to remember that community property laws can vary depending on the jurisdiction. States like California, Texas, and Arizona for example all follow community property rules, but the specifics—such as how separate property is defined or how debts are divided—can differ from one state to another. I would recommend consulting a local attorney who’s familiar with your state’s laws to ensure you fully understand how they’ll affect your divorce and property division. Each state has its own nuances that could significantly impact the outcome of your case.

 

[gib68sg]

I’ve come across several community property issues in law school, and I wanted to mention that while many of the principles I’ve studied may apply to your situation, it’s important to remember that community property laws can vary depending on the jurisdiction. States like California, Texas, and Arizona for example all follow community property rules, but the specifics—such as how separate property is defined or how debts are divided—can differ from one state to another. I would recommend consulting a local attorney who’s familiar with your state’s laws to ensure you fully understand how they’ll affect your divorce and property division. Each state has its own nuances that could significantly impact the outcome of your case.

Or you could be like me and have attorneys in 2 states 3000 miles apart from each other because the woman filed identical cases in both states

 

[Samson250]

I’m taking community property right now in my 3rd year of law school and got an A in family law over the summer as an elective. Did you buy the house before or after you got married?

Can I pay you for council in Bluetop kits?

 

[Growthman]

Or you could be like me and have attorneys in 2 states 3000 miles apart from each other because the woman filed identical cases in both states

That’s crazy—1 should have been thrown out due to the rules of civil procedure. Only one court would be a proper venue and one would have issues with personal jurisdiction. Crazy though.

 

[gib68sg]

That’s crazy—1 should have been thrown out due to the rules of civil procedure. Only one court would be a proper venue and one would have issues with personal jurisdiction. Crazy though.

Well, wish me luck for today then lol

 

[cage99]

Get the lawyer that knows everyone and only cares about his reputation. Because he will do everything he can to win. He cares more about that than what he'll bill you. Because he aspires one day to be a judge. That's the guy you want.

I got full custody of my two daughters and I did not have to pay the ex a single cent in assets or spousal maintenance.

@Big A, I totally get what you’re saying, but the court system in the Deep South, especially Nola is terrible to the male. I spent several hundred thousand in my divorce plus many repeat visits cause my X is absolutely f’n worthless.

Some examples, my X went into involuntary pych ward hold and alcohol detox. Earned 2 DUI’s. Tried suicide with my son in the vehicle with her. Put my son in danger with shitty abusive assholes. I could continue on and on and on but it took 6 extra trips to court to get me full custody. The ONLY reason I got it was because my X didn’t want to do court ordered therapy anymore.

Courts are different in the US, in the South. They have this screwed up notion that they want to keep both parents involved even if one of them is a complete train wreck!!!! Common sense does not exist here!!!!

Glad you got your kids under your care! I fought my ass off to get mine. It’s 100% worth it, but this whole process definitely shaved a few years off my life with the stress.

Cage

 

[Jefe]

All is not lost without a prenuptial. Behold, there is a post nuptial agreement. Could be something worth looking into

 

[tscbest]

I’m finally settling mine after a year and a half. Depending what state you live in. But more than likely she will get “half” or you can just pay her out. Another option is fighting in court for it all and show the progress and money you spent etc. and USE anything on her if she did not want to work or etc. good luck brother! I had to pay mine out to keep my house but I kept my house for the children. Just get GOOD family/real estate, lawyer! Be ready to drop money!

 

[Jph30]

Something worth looking into (with a lawyer) is the fact that she "abandoned" the home. She has been gone for months, not contributing and/or making any kind of claim of ownership. She abandoned it.

I was told (of course after my divorce was already done) that in my state if the spouse left the home for more than 30 days they are considered to have abandoned the home and have no claim to it...... but I'm no lawyer, and this info came through the grape vine.... but still, something worth looking into.

Best of luck to you sir.

 

[Jefe]

My doctor has been married/ divorced 5 times. He said it’s so expensive because it’s worth it! I guess he has experience

 

[Fleezy]

My doctor has been married/ divorced 5 times.

that's a strange fetish... seeing how many times your savings and assets can be cut in half

sounds like he's a really slow learner.. or mentally ill

 

[drafty_c]

I know this thread is old but I just finished my divorce and dealt with almost the same situation. Things were friendly at first, then money and equity entered the picture and it got complicated fast. Once you’re talking about buyouts, upgrades, and not wanting to lose a low interest rate, this stops being something you should try to figure out yourself.

I went through this in Chicago and worked with WARD FAMILY LAW. They knew how to handle equity buyouts and separate contributions without pushing me into a refinance I couldn’t afford. Trying to settle it on my own would’ve cost me a lot more in the long run.

If anyone else is reading this later, don’t wait until it turns ugly. Get legal advice early, even if things seem calm right now.