Do any of your wives...

[Cerberus777]

Bro, a third party is best! Honestly if you've made changes, and have done your best...someone else looking her in the eye saying "what else do you want" is great.
Plus both people can learn to communicate better. If your not doing something right than you also can know what to do in a way she can see it.

 

[raw33man]

You make it sound like she has feeling for the ex husband haaa... she cares about him is what I mean

 

[lyndonlawrence]

thanks for the reality check

I am married to the most perfect person ever to walk the planet. my friends have called me stupid for some infidelities but I have given everything for 30 years to be a good dad and a so so husband. I had a wayward mom and it still affects me today with wandering lust. bad moms are killers. bad dads can be overcome.
but I will do some self inventory as you would love this relationship and I should be more endeared to it. thanks. and best of luck friend.

 

[Achilles-reborn]

After 10 years of marriage, 3 kids and every marital problem you can imagine, I can tell you three facts:
1. Love is a choice
2. Marriage is extremely hard work
3. No other person can make you happy.

I got married too young and under the most difficult circumstances you can imagine and I've spent more time in a preverbal fox hole than I ever have in any honeymoon stage.

We've made it work though and are stronger because of it. As a product of divorce as a child, I'm extremely proud that my boys are in the minority of kids that grow up with both parents at home and don't have to deal with custody battles and two Christmases.

I know it's easier said than done but if you can hang in there, dig in and make it happen. I know it sucks to be the only one trying but sometimes it takes an anchor to weather the storm. I wish you the best brother!


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[Achilles-reborn]

I am married to the most perfect person ever to walk the planet. my friends have called me stupid for some infidelities but I have given everything for 30 years to be a good dad and a so so husband. I had a wayward mom and it still affects me today with wandering lust. bad moms are killers. bad dads can be overcome.

but I will do some self inventory as you would love this relationship and I should be more endeared to it. thanks. and best of luck friend.

You said a mouthful there brother.


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[scrapper13]

My advice is to seek therapy and give it your best try to fix it, you married her for a reason. At the same time set a limit to how long you'll wait to see changes, life is too short to be unhappy.

 

[Miss Q]

Is there a nice way to ask her to go see a doctor for bipolar disorder

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This made me laugh!

I believe the answer to your question above, is NO!

 

[moparfreak360]

This made me laugh!

I believe the answer to your question above, is NO!

That's what I thought lol

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[moparfreak360]

bc it makes her feel inadequate in my experience. like the better husband and father I became the more she resintented me cuz she was insecure and didn't think she could measure up. humans don't like to feel inferior to anyone so they replace feeling inferior to blaming.
I could fill this thread with some crzy stories bout my wife.
she is lucky she is so fucking hot and likes 3 ways. tbh, she has changed a lot and just in time. I was getting really tired of it just like you are now. it was bout the 3 year mark she decided she would try to work on things (herself) then that took about a year to set in.....
-MB

Thanks for the response brother....idk if its true or not but that may be the issue....who knows.....tonight I cooked dinner, cleaned all the dishes while she relaxed, and she's still being a bitch...won't hardly look at me..........I think she's gonna leave eventually I'm just trying to do the right thing and do my part to make it work...............for better or worse should come with some fine print to read

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[Cerberus777]

This made me laugh!

I believe the answer to your question above, is NO!

A good therapist can pick up on it and refer her to another doc that will tell her

 

[Racepicks]

It's funny how when you first meet a woman. you're perfect! Then they try little by little to mold you to the man they think they want. When you finally give in and change, they leave you anyway saying you're not the person you were when she first met you. SMH :banghead:

 

[Simpllyhuge]

I think she wants you to tell her what to do.

 

[letsrun4it]

i feel for you, you're in a tough spot. do everything you can to make it work. find your happiness elsewhere if you need to. just be the best person you can be everyday and hang in there man.

 

[lyndonlawrence]

YOU GOT A BROTHER HERE

You said a mouthful there brother.


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PLEASURE TO MEET YOU THUS ALONE. HIRAM

 

[Achilles-reborn]

PLEASURE TO MEET YOU THUS ALONE. HIRAM

Lol. Be careful; our kind are not viewed in very high regard on this board. Keep seeking the light.


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[Deleted member 121863]

mopar, is there anything you wouldn`t do to make the marriage work? Ask her the same thing, if either one of you has some hesitation of uh, well I need this or that.. you just might be done. If the first answer by both of you is, without a doubt, to keep the person I fell in love with I`d lap the earth over 8 times, you got a chance. Tell her this! Woman love with their ears and a few actions, open up, shed a tear drop, it will go a mile, put it out there what everything means to you... then walk the walk. Tell her, history is past, today starts now, write shit down what you each want, don`t want.

 

[nattydread]

Sorry to hear what you are going thru man. I'll keep you in my prayers,also your wife. I've read thru all the post and feel that a third party is the best way to go. A therapist or if you are a religious man you can also go thru your church.
I will be praying that this works out for you. Keep your head up brother.

 

[concreter]

Love is a bitch, going on 20yrs in may and both took are rings off again last night. We do this a few times every year and always feel its finally over.
Probably should of been divorced a year after marriage but:
Loves a bitch.
Hope it works out for you, I know how hard it is, both staying with or thinking of leaving such a women.

 

[MrPump]

but let's be real, she's going to get most of your stuff, and you'll be lucky to see your kid every other weekend.

OML, dont listen to this.

This shit happens to dads that dont care. They dont show up for the hearings, they dont particpate in the negotiations, etc...

If you have a good lawyer, you can easily get every weekend or even 50/50 with Summers negotiated.

The key is this... when you first sit down to talk about what each other wants. ASK FOR IT ALL! she will be as well. Then you can go from there and meet in the middle. Where guys fuck themselves is they try to use this time to be "nice" for some reason. DO NOT BE NICE.. .THIS IS A COMPETITON. YOU NEED TO WIN...not be liked.

Good luck bro.

 

[triathloncoach]

Is there a nice way to ask her to go see a doctor for bipolar disorder

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Tell her that all of your friends and family think she is crazy and you can do much better.

Seriously tho, are the issues you are having similar to the issues that ended her previous marriage? If this is true she either recognizes this and agrees to work on changing, or you are really fighting an uphill battle.