Drunk Guy Picks Up My 3yr Old Son!

[Steve123]

You made a decision so quit worrying about it. However, I personally think that IF you were going to do something you'd have done it and you wouldn't be on here asking for justification for your non response. You're mad at yourself for freezing up or not taking action and you want to hear that it's okay for how you reacted. It's akin to the "you're lucky my friend was standing there or I'd have kicked your ass" comments so many make.

As for the person who said the police would try to arrest you for defending an intoxicated person who put his hands on your son, I highly highly disagree. In fact, I'd venture to say that he would have gone to jail for one: being publically intoxicated and two: Assault by Contact on your son or more if I could push the issue with the DA.

HA!!! God help you than if you live where I do - Peoples Republic of Massachusetts!!

My cousin lives in Texas and she carries a 9mm Rugar on a gun belt. She could probably shoot the son of a bitch and get some kind of public service award.

If I even restrained the guy here in Mass. I would probably be convicted of aggravated assualt or something. You wouldn't beleive the shit that goes on in the courts in this state. Simply put, your logic, while certainly valid, would likely get shot full of holes somehow!

 

[HardKnox]

HA!!! God help you than if you live where I do - Peoples Republic of Massachusetts!!

My cousin lives in Texas and she carries a 9mm Rugar on a gun belt. She could probably shoot the son of a bitch and get some kind of public service award.

If I even restrained the guy here in Mass. I would probably be convicted of aggravated assualt or something. You wouldn't beleive the shit that goes on in the courts in this state. Simply put, your logic, while certainly valid, would likely get shot full of holes somehow!

I'll concede that your state is assbackwards, however, and as most of us do, we think of where we live and I do live in Texas and that shit just wouldn't be tolerated here. So, my logic would more than likely fly here in the Lone Star State, but I can see where you're coming from regarding your state.

 

[Steve123]

I'll concede that your state is assbackwards, however, and as most of us do, we think of where we live and I do live in Texas and that shit just wouldn't be tolerated here. So, my logic would more than likely fly here in the Lone Star State, but I can see where you're coming from regarding your state.

I hear you bro. Obviously some hyperbole on my part regarding my cousin. While she does carry a 9mm with her, I'm sure she wouldn't get away with using it Although, she did open her front door one night and shoot a couple of copperheads that decided her front steps would be a good place to mate.

Mass sucks dude. I swear the authorities in this state resent the hell out of regular people who work, obey the law, speak english and embrace the American dream. We are the enemy here.

 

[kingpeon]

The fact of the matter is he should have done something! What he chose to do is up to him but for Pete's sake next time something like this happens don't just sit there watching it happen.

 

[Theatrix]

I don't believe this has anything to do with "Being a Man" or protecting your family. It's almost as if we look for reasons to be aggressive or prove our manhood!
Or perhaps its cultural. I grew up in Europe and can visualize many times when I was in this kind of situation. I have also travelled the world and been in situations where my children where approached by individuals who were possibly inebriated but just being friendly.
Simple words come to mind first, something like " Hey my friend, not a good a idea to pick him up like that, he may throw up on you" ....whatever.

My father was 23 years 75th Ranger Regiment. I grew up in many countries and as a young man watched my father deal with situations that I knew he could have "handled" very easily. Violence should be your last resort, not your first. Won't bore you with cliches, but your strength is in restaint.

 

[BOOMSHAKER]

I'll concede that your state is assbackwards, however, and as most of us do, we think of where we live and I do live in Texas and that shit just wouldn't be tolerated here. So, my logic would more than likely fly here in the Lone Star State, but I can see where you're coming from regarding your state.

Times are changing my friend. Criminals have more rights then the hard working man and woman do. Sad but true. Not to mention the benches are slowing filling up with liberal judges. Way too many people are finding this out slowly but surely.

 

[Steve123]

Times are changing my friend. Criminals have more rights then the hard working man and woman do. Sad but true. Not to mention the benches are slowing filling up with liberal judges. Way too many people are finding this out slowly but surely.

sad but very true. We are like frogs in a pot of warm water being slowly heated. We are all comfortable and happy. By the time we realize we are being cooked it will be too late.

 

[BOOMSHAKER]

sad but very true. We are like frogs in a pot of warm water being slowly heated. We are all comfortable and happy. By the time we realize we are being cooked it will be too late.

That is a great analogy my friend. Most folks if you change their life over night then there would be a big uproar. But if you change it little by little by little then they come to accept it more. And that's what happening to our everyday walk in life.

 

[EatOrBeEaten1]

You made a decision so quit worrying about it. However, I personally think that IF you were going to do something you'd have done it and you wouldn't be on here asking for justification for your non response. You're mad at yourself for freezing up or not taking action and you want to hear that it's okay for how you reacted. It's akin to the "you're lucky my friend was standing there or I'd have kicked your ass" comments so many make.

As for the person who said the police would try to arrest you for defending an intoxicated person who put his hands on your son, I highly highly disagree. In fact, I'd venture to say that he would have gone to jail for one: being publically intoxicated and two: Assault by Contact on your son or more if I could push the issue with the DA.

As I said before I am 22 and have little experience in being a father. My posts intent was not to get justification for the way I reacted. It was to get other peoples opinion on my situation whether they agreed or disagreed inorder to better myself as a new father. This way if someone has been in a similar situation or knows of a similar situation, or just has some good advice I can learn from it. A prime example is was a comment posted about situational awareness. When I noticed that the man was drunk and beligerent I could have switched seats so that my son was further away from him.There were many other good examples of things I could have done and I will keep it in mind. How do you think people learn? If i wanted someone to agree w/ me I definitely would not post my story on an anonymous forum.

 

[kingpeon]

Your attitude is...extra-ordinary!

 

[Steve123]

As I said before I am 22 and have little experience in being a father. My posts intent was not to get justification for the way I reacted. It was to get other peoples opinion on my situation whether they agreed or disagreed inorder to better myself as a new father. This way if someone has been in a similar situation or knows of a similar situation, or just has some good advice I can learn from it. A prime example is was a comment posted about situational awareness. When I noticed that the man was drunk and beligerent I could have switched seats so that my son was further away from him.There were many other good examples of things I could have done and I will keep it in mind. How do you think people learn? If i wanted someone to agree w/ me I definitely would not post my story on an anonymous forum.

Stop over-thinking this. You did the right thing given that particular situation. You'll know when there is a real threat and you'll act on it accordingly..

And, don't listen to the guys saying, "i would have done this and I would have done that".... Blah blah blah blah blah.... I bet half of them would be hiding under a table (I'm not pointing that at anyone inparticular). Take my advice, it's always the loudest guy in the room who does the most yelling and screaming; that constantly has to remind everyone what a tough guy he is, that almost invariably, in my experience, ends up being completely full of shit.

People who are the real deal usually don't feel the need to tell everyone about it.

 

[Steve123]

That is a great analogy my friend. Most folks if you change their life over night then there would be a big uproar. But if you change it little by little by little then they come to accept it more. And that's what happening to our everyday walk in life.

So true. If I would have told you 15 years ago that a superior court judge would let a child rapist serve "house arrest" because he (it) is Trangendered and therefore cannot be adequately accomodated in the Prison System, you would have laughed at me. But welcome to the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, 2005, and become acquainted with Judge Lopez (I beleive that's her name) and beleive it or not, that is how she ruled at sentencing.....

 

[kingpeon]

Stop over-thinking this. You did the right thing given that particular situation. You'll know when there is a real threat and you'll act on it accordingly..

And, don't listen to the guys saying, "i would have done this and I would have done that".... Blah blah blah blah blah.... I bet half of them would be hiding under a table (I'm not pointing that at anyone inparticular). Take my advice, it's always the loudest guy in the room who does the most yelling and screaming; that constantly has to remind everyone what a tough guy he is, that almost invariably, in my experience, ends up being completely full of shit.

People who are the real deal usually don't feel the need to tell everyone about it.

I will assume you are referring to one of my posts. He already told us that he felt like he should have done something about it. He also asked for honest opinions on what each of us would have done and not to hold back. He didn't ask to be coddled and ass kissed. Nobody here is going to act like some tough guy over the net. That is just stupid. So quit speaking for him like you started the thread. Some of us gave a scenario about what we would have done and I assure you that what I said IS what I would have done. I am the humble, take-care-of-business-when-needed type you alluded to.

 

[Ivan]

This is what I try to do

Situational awareness is the number one factor in your defense , be aware of your suroundings at all times , like I mentioned before shit happens fast and hindsite is always 20/20.
Not saying you need to walk around paranoid out of your gourd , but teach yourself to pay better attention to your surroundings. Identify possible threats and put yourself at the advantage , keep you face to the crowd and keep yourself between your loved ones and the threat. Yea waiters and shit get annoyed with you for wanting to pick differant seats and shit but screw them your the customer and the customer is always right.
Off the soapbox now , I can't say that the situation would have gone as well as your if it were me , I can't see their not being some sort of contact and explanation witht he guy but their again things escalate very fast and the next thing you know you could have your family in the middle of a fight.

you did the right thing bro , don't beat yourself up over it. Its over and everybody came out of it great , use this time as a learning experiance though retrace the event and think about what you could have done to prevent the situation.

This post makes the most sense to me out of all of them. I always scrutinize my surroundings, perception is a weapon. I try to minimize situations or opportunities for problems or threats, however they can sorta sneak into the picture like in the op's scenario. I always identify when there is a drunk, and pretty much zero in on any potential problems brewing with him or her. In this particular case, it happened fast, and luckily nobody was hurt. You are a little shook up as you have spent a lot of time processing what just happened, (eatorbeaten) and all the what if's and could have happened's are running rampant through your emotions. So just take it as a learned lesson -- and try to prepare yourself for environments like this in the future. I think you did the right thing, sure you bristled when he put his hands on your son, and although he was drunk he sounded like he found your son to be a little stud. I mean, it was Easter, who knows, maybe he lost a son, or cannot see his son and yours reminded him of his. Now do not get me wrong, this is NO EXCUSE for picking him up and tossing him up in the air like that, that is completely and 100% inappropriate. I applaud you for keeping your cool, and I am glad you can come here and vent to your brothers here at PM.

 

[Steve123]

I will assume you are referring to one of my posts. He already told us that he felt like he should have done something about it. He also asked for honest opinions on what each of us would have done and not to hold back. He didn't ask to be coddled and ass kissed. Nobody here is going to act like some tough guy over the net. That is just stupid. So quit speaking for him like you started the thread. Some of us gave a scenario about what we would have done and I assure you that what I said IS what I would have done. I am the humble, take-care-of-business-when-needed type you alluded to.

well, in all honesty I didn't even read the post you're referring to so I'm pretty sure I wasn't talking about you. Either way, fair enough. If you are that humble type to which I alluded, you will understand why I find wanna-be tough guys so funny and that means we're probably on a similar, if not the same, page. As far as I'm concerned, the kid got his son away from the guy and removed his family from a potentiall explosive situation. That is always the right thing to do..not always possible, but right where it is. So many unfortunate things can happen when you get a table full of drunks pissed off by instantly confronting them. protect the fam first at least...get them the hell out of there so that when bottles, plates, glass, forks and knives, chairs and tables and shit start flying around, they are safely in the car. I'm out of here. I'm a tool for continuing to post in this thread. Shows you how bord I am today -= LOL

 

[Chubz]

I really cant stand drunk people in public,Maybe and only maybe I would not have beat him down because my family was there, but I would have at least grabbed my son from him and let him know that is not cool and to please keep his hands to himself. As other people have said you should always be aware of your surroundings and be prepared for situations. I grew up though having to protect myself and my dad pounded in my head that nobody ever touches his family. I was at the movie theatre last year with my 13 year old son and a group of 16-18 year old kids came into the movie towards the end of it, they were loud and on their phones, the one boy kept bumping my son with his shoulder over and over, I asked him to stop nicely, he mocked every word I said, I moved my son aside and open hand bitch slapped him across his face, they all got up and ran out of there, the people in the theatre applauded me. When I walked out into the lobby they had called the police, the boy I hit was crying and you could see my handprint across his face, a couple people from the theatre said they were being very provoking and there was 4 of them and one of me, they let me walk away calling it self defense.

 

[taba]

I am young, only 22 and this is my only kid, so you can see why I was so ready to kick ass. But I do agree with you.

I'm impressed that at 22 yrs old you held your composure so well. I raised 2 sons, so I can feel what you went thru in this situation. Too many young bros hold there feelings on their sleeves and react first and never give thought to a volatile situation. I have taught my sons to always try to think it thru and do not react with no sense of responsibility. You have the makings of one hell of a father. Props to you bro!

 

[Phidias]

i dont want to go against the grain here

but

i would have lost it

sorry

I hate to admit it, but me too... there are borders you just can't cross.

That asshole and his buddies needed a good lesson, period. Until someone beats the living shit out of him, he'll keep on acting the same way again and again...

 

[dragonfire101]

Tenny, the only problem is, if he would have kicked the drunk guys ass HE would have gone to jail. NOT the drunk guy. I know it's a bad deal but the cops would have some law up their sleeve that says "you knew the guy was drunk why did you have to kick his ass"? Then wham, they slam the cuffs on dad and the drunks gets a slap on the wrist. Definitly not fair. But thats the way shit happens in real life. Then the kid would be without a father for a few days. And maybe even a few years if a liberal judge convicts him. F@cked up world we live in.

exactly....with the child present he would have been charged possibly for risk of injury and even several other charges if the confrontation became physical. I seen this happen many times and other similar situations between family members not even strangers who were arrested.

 

[Jappy's Boy]

I think that you handled it very well Eat...