Fraud by wife... Need HELP~

chgolatin2 · Oct 11, 2015

Hey guys, I am in the middle of a divorce but that's not the real issue. The issue is that my soon to be "EX" Wife unknowingly was committing fraud with the state government/federal government. She was claiming to be a "Home Care provider" and using her parents as an excuse to cheat the government. She has been getting paid by the state government for providing care to her father. Now grant it, that her parents and family have all been taking part in this illegal scheme stating that the parents are ill, etc etc. My wife has been getting a pay check from the State and I informed her that due to my career that she can't be doing illegal things because I may become part of whatever fraud she's committing. She told me not to worry about it and that she has been doing this for yeaaaars! :banghead:

I told her that I don't want any part of it, PERIOD! Now in order to protect my job, etc is there a way that I can obtain her records from her illegal job and get information about her income, taxes paid, etc????? Since I am still legally her husband I can make a request to obtain such records, right???? How can I do this???? I want to be able to prove that she has been doing this illegal activity for years in court with the judge.. This bitch has become a psychotic maniac causing all kinds of stress, drama at work and she constantly calls the police on me making false allegations, etc. Now no reports have been file or no action has been taken by the police but you guys can see that this is not a good thing. Since we are still "legally" married even though she moved out of the house, she still comes by, brings her friends, family over to my house to cause me problems. Her sister makes fun at me, telling me. "See how you fucked yourself, you are legally married and I have the right to be in your house even if you don't like it! My sister is married to you and I can be here because she has the legal authority to allow me inside of your home because your home is her home too." I mean WTF!

Her sister constantly makes threats to me, verbally not physically, her mother and her whole family are up to no good. Why the fuck did I marry this Assyrian gypsy women is beyond me! I called the police to have her sister removed from my property, well the police said that as long as I am married to this psycho women that she can have anyone in my property at her choosing because she has legal domain status... That she can legally have her whole family move into my house and that there's nothing that I can do about it!! WHAAAAAT!!!!!

Fucking nightmare from the bottom of hell! Guys, I need help. Serious help, what can I do? I already have my attorney involve but this isn't fair. But I know that in the end I will be victorious.. Just need to protect myself from this devil in the process.

Thanks~

rangerjockey · Oct 11, 2015

1. Write a memorandum to your suppervisor and cover your ass. Use the words "may" ,"possibly" etc., "I am not a tax-law expert" play niave. Do not or ever paint your self into a corner with facts let the law discover the facts.

2. divorce her and play somewhat stupid. " I assumed what she was doing was legal." again, " I know nothing about tax law and fraud". Tell her you wont "say" anything. oberserve, you didnt say "write" anybody, correct?

3. you need to think cleverly about your near future, I would get your air-born "screaming eagle ass" out of there. Whatever you do, DO NOT PUT HANDS ON HER. EVER.

Bionic · Oct 11, 2015

My heart goes out to you, bro. Listen, while some others here may have been through similar, you need to be seeking advice from a lawyer and not here. You can get one that specializes in forensic accounting and whatnot. Nothing is new to these guys and they'll know what to do.

But here's the thing, (just my unprofessional opinion) her side is going to show that you knew all about/benefitted from her shenanigans. The fact is, while you didn't want any part of it, you didn't do anything to stop it ergo, you're part of the conspiracy to commit fraud. Playing dumb won't help. Remember, it's not what you know, it's what you can prove. Anyways, talk to a pro ASAMFP! Good luck to you.

little slice · Oct 12, 2015

rangerjockey said:
Whatever you do, DO NOT PUT HANDS ON HER. EVER.

this won't help.. she can hurt herself or have her friends/family hurt her and then 'bear witness/testify' against OP and he will go to jail.

if they are all willing to commit some type of fraud, they'll probably see no issue in committing other types.

OP should consider himself lucky that she hasn't already taken this step.

OP, it's a little late for you, but I do wish you the best and I hope justice somehow finds it way to you in your situation.

to every other man in this thread, DO NOT GET MARRIED.

Goody · Oct 12, 2015

I personally wouldn't bring it up. You think she's crazy now? Just wait till she finds out ur trying to rat her and her family out.
I'd put my morals aside on this one and let it slide and just try to get divorce over with as quickly as possible
You might wanna keep that knowledge in ur back pocket though, might come in handy as a bargaining chip or just let it slide altogether and move on as quickly as possible.
My 2 cents from someone whose been there

j2048b · Oct 12, 2015

Yup bro u dont need to seek "vengeance" or some other low standard just because this B#[^tch is cray cray,

U want to get rid of her sister and all the others that come into ir house? Restraining orders work wonders on sluts! Maybe not the ex but any of her family it should! Check into it.... And what made this "happy family" come crashing down? I remeber thinking that once a member of the party moves out then they forfeit their rights to said property??? Maybe im just talking out of my ass?

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OuchThatHurts · Oct 12, 2015

WTF is wrong with people today?!?

I agree with much of what is said here but you need to distance yourself from this person. I mean literally. Go stay with a friend, whatever. Whatever the state paid her should be publicly available and her IRS filings may be available. But! Don't YOU try to prosecute this person.

Tell your attorney everything you just told us and let the chips fall where they may. Maybe she even gets away with it. So what. Not your problem. She's your problem. Get away from the thief and protect yourself in every way.

chgolatin2 · Oct 13, 2015

I am meeting with my attorney tomorrow, meaning "Tues" to formulate a plan and guess what he told me....??? "Bring your checkbook!" WTF! :banghead: NEVER EVER EVER WILL I EVER GET MARRIED! It's a failed institution and at the end the man will ALWAYS LOSE!

Jrock37 · Oct 19, 2015

Yes you are correct. Did you ever see the little joke where their is a boy and girl standing face to face and the little girl pulls her shorts open towards him and says I'm going to ruin your life with this.

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little slice · Oct 19, 2015

Jrock37 said:
Yes you are correct. Did you ever see the little joke where their is a boy and girl standing face to face and the little girl pulls her shorts open towards him and says I'm going to ruin your life with this.

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that's... ..weird

anyways, these days, a woman doesn't need to actually do anything with a man to ruin his life..

I know I may come off as really negative regarding women, but there is a reason for that. we, as men, are quite literally at their mercy..

don't believe me? search youtube for a man named William Mcaffery.

an anecdote? sure.. but it just goes to show you what 1 women with ABSOLUTELY ZERO EVIDENCE can do to a man whenever she pleases (keep in mind, he was found guilty by a jury...a jury of 12 people...unanimously...with zero evidence)

rangerjockey · Oct 19, 2015

I have to say 1 thing about marriage. For me the 1st one was a disaster. the second is wonderful 11 years with her. A beautiful faithful loving mother and wonderful wife, who enjoys var, t-bol and working out. The hard part is finding your self , then "her" .........or not. good luck bro.

j6 · Oct 19, 2015

chgolatin2 said:
Hey guys, I am in the middle of a divorce but that's not the real issue. The issue is that my soon to be "EX" Wife unknowingly was committing fraud with the state government/federal government. She was claiming to be a "Home Care provider" and using her parents as an excuse to cheat the government. She has been getting paid by the state government for providing care to her father. Now grant it, that her parents and family have all been taking part in this illegal scheme stating that the parents are ill, etc etc. My wife has been getting a pay check from the State and I informed her that due to my career that she can't be doing illegal things because I may become part of whatever fraud she's committing. She told me not to worry about it and that she has been doing this for yeaaaars! :banghead:

I told her that I don't want any part of it, PERIOD! Now in order to protect my job, etc is there a way that I can obtain her records from her illegal job and get information about her income, taxes paid, etc????? Since I am still legally her husband I can make a request to obtain such records, right???? How can I do this???? I want to be able to prove that she has been doing this illegal activity for years in court with the judge.. This bitch has become a psychotic maniac causing all kinds of stress, drama at work and she constantly calls the police on me making false allegations, etc. Now no reports have been file or no action has been taken by the police but you guys can see that this is not a good thing. Since we are still "legally" married even though she moved out of the house, she still comes by, brings her friends, family over to my house to cause me problems. Her sister makes fun at me, telling me. "See how you fucked yourself, you are legally married and I have the right to be in your house even if you don't like it! My sister is married to you and I can be here because she has the legal authority to allow me inside of your home because your home is her home too." I mean WTF! Her sister constantly makes threats to me, verbally not physically, her mother and her whole family are up to no good. Why the fuck did I marry this Assyrian gypsy women is beyond me! I called the police to have her sister removed from my property, well the police said that as long as I am married to this psycho women that she can have anyone in my property at her choosing because she has legal domain status... That she can legally have her whole family move into my house and that there's nothing that I can do about it!! WHAAAAAT!!!!!

Fucking nightmare from the bottom of hell! Guys, I need help. Serious help, what can I do? I already have my attorney involve but this isn't fair. But I know that in the end I will be victorious.. Just need to protect myself from this devil in the process.

Thanks~

Not sure about the "fraud" thing but at the end of the day- if you didn't participate I doubt you will have any thing legally to worry about. Meaning, if she were to get caught, I doubt they will try to prosecute you. However, the fact that all this could go down WILL affect you in every way and cause major issues. Just that fact that it could happen.. Talk to your attorney and get legal advice.

Now, if she has vacated the residence, the primary residence, you have every right to change the locks. You must prove that she has moved out and vacated the home. And although this will cause you unwanted attention, call the police when she (they) show up. Claim harassment. Talk to your attorney and get legal advice.

If its that bad, visit your local Police Department and have "im just giving you a heads up of whats going on".

Record every conversation in her company. Got a smart phone? I have an Ipone and you can record conversations. DO IT.

Bottom line,, protect your self and hire a good divorce attorney.. I get the money thing but if you think its expensive to hire a professional, think about the cost to hire an amateur.... I did the latter and 6 years later I am kicking myself for the decisions (financially) I was talked into. ONLY hire a Divorce attorney.

Not sure where you live but its probably going to cost you a 5k retainer and they will bill you monthly. You could get away w 2,500-3,500 retainer but I don know. Depending on what you jointly own, you could be 10-15k total cost.

One last bit of advice... DO NOT stoke the fire. Keep your mouth SHUT and smile everytime she gets at you. The goal is to get her out of your life as quickly as possible- you must, must, must realize this because you could make life miserable for your self if you don't.

Take it slow, breath and take time when she is gone. Take care of YOU!

Good luck,

j6