- Joined
- Feb 24, 2010
- Messages
- 273
Don't know why I decided to post this, maybe I'm venting, maybe just looking for street credit (jk). Point being, I spent 3 months in jail for a warrant I've been hoping didn't catch up to me... Well it did. Nothing serious, just a BS victimless crime involving a plea deal for tax evasion I was quoted in court as promising to pay back by a certain date. I took the deal to avoid penalties and or jail time for a tax audit I failed miserably back in 2008. I truly thought I would never see a jail cell for not paying a portion of my taxes. I've been in prison before, but for what I would call an "actual crime". But now I have a family and businesses that could have done better without my little vacation.
Anyhow, its not like what you see on TV, no weights, no decent food to speak of and certainly no means of staying in shape when accustomed to a gym based routine.
So, I'm out now since about 3 weeks ago and I'm having a hell of a time adjusting to my TRT dose. I was on cycle when I got popped and I've lost around 25lbs since. I started taking my TRT just as soon as I got out, in the car ride home as a matter of fact (125mg week). I just don't feel the same as I did before I went in. I was on TRT for well over 10 years, and the 90 days really has me messed up mentally. I had no interest in sex when I got out and that was sign number one that something was not right. I know the loss of muscle doesn't help, but the real problem is the constant ups and downs I've been feeling since I starting taking the Test. again. I almost felt better not being on anything (minus the lack of sex drive).
I don't know if I should just call it quits and try taking maybe a Test. Cream and forget the whole BB life style. Or is it that i'm just in a rut and it's gonna take me some time to get re-accustomed to using AAS. I'm 35 now and for the first time in over a decade I feel as if I could actually stop AAS and just be an average Joe. I'm weighing in at 187 and besides the depressive feeling I get when I look in the mirror, I'm actually content with being so small.
Anyone else ever hit a crossroad in their life where they think they might wanna stop AAS and just be normal? and if so; how did it work out for you and do have any regrets?
Sorry for the essay, I'm just feeling a bit emotional today and needed to get some shit off my chest.. Other then the 50lbs I lost off my bench press.
Anyhow, its not like what you see on TV, no weights, no decent food to speak of and certainly no means of staying in shape when accustomed to a gym based routine.
So, I'm out now since about 3 weeks ago and I'm having a hell of a time adjusting to my TRT dose. I was on cycle when I got popped and I've lost around 25lbs since. I started taking my TRT just as soon as I got out, in the car ride home as a matter of fact (125mg week). I just don't feel the same as I did before I went in. I was on TRT for well over 10 years, and the 90 days really has me messed up mentally. I had no interest in sex when I got out and that was sign number one that something was not right. I know the loss of muscle doesn't help, but the real problem is the constant ups and downs I've been feeling since I starting taking the Test. again. I almost felt better not being on anything (minus the lack of sex drive).
I don't know if I should just call it quits and try taking maybe a Test. Cream and forget the whole BB life style. Or is it that i'm just in a rut and it's gonna take me some time to get re-accustomed to using AAS. I'm 35 now and for the first time in over a decade I feel as if I could actually stop AAS and just be an average Joe. I'm weighing in at 187 and besides the depressive feeling I get when I look in the mirror, I'm actually content with being so small.
Anyone else ever hit a crossroad in their life where they think they might wanna stop AAS and just be normal? and if so; how did it work out for you and do have any regrets?
Sorry for the essay, I'm just feeling a bit emotional today and needed to get some shit off my chest.. Other then the 50lbs I lost off my bench press.
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