I am in need of help

[Starkraven]

Some of you might know but for those who don't, i'm 22 and have some real issues i need to learn to deal with. In just a couple days, i'm going to have my FELONY drug charges dismissed. I'm eligible for penal code 1203.4. 3 years ago i was caught with a lot of thai dbol and pled no contest to possession for sale charges. luckily i wasnt indicted on federal charges from customs (1600 dbol). [its pretty bad for only that amount] i'm currently unemployed and have been for a very long time, not to mention i was forced to do 126 days (1008 hours) of cal-trans (freeway community service, hard shit) for 1.5 years. so i was dealing and now im done, i dont want to do it anymore, im clean and want to be that way with my life, it isnt worth it to me anymore, but i have no money, i live with my mom, i dont mooch off her if u think that, she doesnt buy me anything. i used to deal and now im done with all that. And i want to get out here too and be independent. maybe im living in a fantasy land. i want to get out of here if i am going to school (more focus)

i can go to school for free (grants), but i dont want to live here anymore (bitchy mom, more bitchy when i havent done shit (school/work for years) and i have a few bills to pay. car/food. shes been helping with the car for a year now but its time i pay it and thats cool but give me a fuckin job man..wtf?? everywhere i go i get turned down because of my felony. even the lowest paying jobs. im sick of it and cant wait for it to get expunged. this is what i was waiting for. thats why i never cared so much about applying for work in the last couple months. but when i do get it off, where should i go work that makes enough money to be independent? I live in LA, CA so its expensive to live here btw. also, i heard that even though my record is sealed, people can still see i was arrested and the case dismissed. this isnt good either man. i was 19 when i did this and wasnt thinking right. i didnt know shit about anything, im pretty dumb sorry had to mention that. i have no skills in anything, and i dont want to feel down on myself either. so long to working for the police department.

also, this is bugging me alot. when im in the gym, i get attention from girls, especially from older women too which i like most because young girls are stupid and immature, but i dont feel like talking to them and asking them out because im insecure about my financial situation, being broke and cant take care of myself..yet hopefully. so i want some advice because i dont want to live here and i dont know what to do and this board is full of great members who have much more life experience and are more stable with their financial situation and more importantly their mind. and im not. please help because im depressed. i am post-cycle too and on clomid maybe this shit is making my depression worse. i chose to quit the gear for a while as others here stated and im sorry i was acting like a child when i was on. its time to move on. thanks.

 

[vitor]

Hmm Stop Clomid, get some Nolvadex. Smile dude, the past is clearing up, good things are on the way. I really find when im upset, depressed putting on a nice smile and thinking postive makes things happen.

I think you should get a shitty job, save for a while, then move out and go back to school.

 

[Starkraven]

my friend helped me with some ideas. im going to have to give up the car, work a shitty job and save 80% of it and invest it in something. i might be able to get a direct contact from china and sell online. nothing illegal. after that i save up 3k and get a car with that and try applying as much as possible for govt jobs like post-office or just better jobs while i work a shitty job/make money online. im feeling much better. i gotta take some steps back in order to move forward. i hate being on the same step and feeling shitty.

 

[vitor]

Remember You eat an Elephant one bite at a time, so take small steps, and if by chanche you do go a step back, you will take 2 foward next time.

Set some goals, make a plan and make it happen.

 

[worldspan]

Bro, re: the employment thing the best course of action you can take is to look at what talents you might have and go into business for yourself. You
will then never have to rely on employers who will fuck you over just cause
you made a mistake once.

Good luck to you man,

Worldspan

 

[Starkraven]

good post guys.

worldspan, i dont have any talents so i was a bit unclear to your statement. i would love to start my own biz like everyone else does, but i dont have a contact yet. but my friend gave me the idea of getting a contact that sells cheap goods and my uncle lives in china so maybe he can help out. ill still need to work a shitty job first in order to make the money to invest but its worth it.

 

[vitor]

Starkraven Male Gigilo? FInd some fattys and do your thang bro.

 

[Starkraven]

lol i really did think of that. im a real attractive guy but i hoped that would be sort of a last resort also, isnt that sort of illegal. trying to stay on track

 

[vitor]

I think they are paying for your time, not your manhood, or so im told.

 

[Starkraven]

in that case, i guess ill think about it

 

[vitor]

See man, laugh have some fun, make the most out of this, you will come out on top, Postive thinking, honestly go out and buy think and grow rich by Napolean Hill.

 

[Starkraven]

ok just got car taken away by mom. fuckin bullshit. fuck it. time to work and save for a car.

 

[Sigmund Roid]

Starkraven,

It certainly seems to me that you have more than paid for your 'crimes'. I could go on about the lameness of the judicial/legal system and it's ridiculous focus on a few Thai dianabol, but I guess that would make us both feel worse. You got a lame deal and are still getting a lame deal. I liked the info MikeS. gave about getting your record expunged. You really should pm him concerning this situation. He has some real expirience and wisdom in that area. He can point you in the right direction. Next, work on being the absolute best son and person you can be. Be blameless in your actions. If you have a spiritual side, like I do, spend some time building up your relationship with God. Lastly and not necessarily in this order, go see a career counselor or a job service rep. I'll tell you, if what I see on tv is correct, the individual who raped and killed the little girl in Florida and was arrested 26 times still got a job at an elementary school! I somehow believe a guy whose worse crime was importing a few pinks, might still have a future! All is not lost, you'll make it!

 

[Starkraven]

Yesterday on 3-23-05 my case was dismissed. i didnt have internet access til now so im updating everyone. basically im off probation and my case was dismissed pursuant to 1203.4 PC which means i am not a convicted felon but public records will still indicate i was arrested and had my case dismissed. this totally fuckin BLOWS by the way, it is NOT expungeable. so long to ever getting a good job. mother fuckers at the human resources dont give a shit, dbol or rape ok? whatever man. actually the judge was about to reduce it to a misd and THEN YOU CAN GET IT EXPUNGED but he was confused with the charge i had. that is only available for Violation Sec. Code 11377 PC H&S (health and safety) and not what i had which was 11378 H&S. this charge can only be dismissed and not expunged. he thought for a sec i had 11377 but he looked it over.

my mom gave me the car back after i begged for it back but i better get a job quick. thats all i hope for. and a good one too, not fuckin mcdonalds. i want a job with the city,state,county,federal like the DMV,post-office or metro. even on the metro app i still need to disclose my past criminal history...and state it was dismissed...for the rest of my life.