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I still can't believe this is happening

Ahhh the one that got away. I crank to the thought of her all the time.
 
Man! This whole thing reads like disaster x 10. It's a lot. Changes have to be made, certainly. I can't really comment about her because I don't know her view of things and there's no way to sort that out. I can only comment on what you have said. With the trauma and all, she's going to need help. Forever. It's a horrible thing, rape. Are you ready to deal with that and everything that goes along with it? It's a lot of responsibility. If you're not ready, than you owe her the chance to work that out.

You have to decide, and when I say decide, I mean just that. Not because she's hot, or young, or the great drunken sex, and all of that. That means nothing. A relationship can often survive with a good friendship and mediocre sex. But a relationship can never survive with a mediocre friendship and great sex.

So, I would suggest making a carefully thought out decision and stick to it. Don't buckle. Lot of great replies here. If you move just to get away from things, you tend to just take your problems with you. If you leave because you've carefully weighed all your options and decided to do it with a clear head, then the outcome is more positive.

But no matter what scenario you choose, make sure it's your decision. Stick by your own decision firmly because of it's logic. Not a rash decision all tied up in knots with emotions and horniness and all that other BS because in the end, it will just be you and her. Do you love her? Is all the work what you want? Or maybe not. Maybe you want something else for your life.

There is a lot written here but it really all comes down to that in it's simplicity. You take out the sex, the drinking, the trauma, the hotness, the dysfunction, and what are you really left with? And is whatever that is worth it? Then put in the work and make it happen. On the other hand, if what you're left with isn't worth it? Then move along, or move away, or just make a decision and do that. But stay in control and run your life. Because it sounds like your life is running you. The tail is wagging the dog. That's not a good place to be.

Good luck and best wishes.
 
I didn't get anything out of that long writing other than you where poping cialis and viagra.but then say you should of gone to a doctor to script you viagra.what for you was already taking it and cialis

The other thing the girl is 21 years old for crying out loud.and talking about wanting to have a family com on bro.

A girl that's 21 whether she is in college or not.she just wants to party and fuck.and you are questioning her why she drinks so much and you can't fuck her.what you expect for to do stay.no she got her shit and went off to get with guys that fuck her and drinks with her just as much.

I'm not trying to be an ass to you.im talking to like a father my oldest son is 26

Just move on with your life have fun and fuck fuck fuck

And ask a mod to move this for you to the dating forum
 
Dont beat urself up bro. It sounds like she has some mental health issues…BPD could be very possible. She definitely has some attachment issues. If ur ego is not in check dating a women with BPD will wreak havoc on ur life. Your better off lettin this one go cheif, unless u like emotional roller coasters.
 
Since I took the time to read through half of this, I feel the need to make some sort of recognition. Wow, that was a lot.

It was my fault. I choose to engage in this. Normally, a guy at work just lays something on me like this, without my solicitation. But this time it was my choice, and I only have myself to blame.

The only thing that I can do is wish you the best.
 
I feel life gives us situations that are very difficult when we least expect it. It’s like going through hell. But it is done to help us grow and to force us to learn which in the ends makes us a better, stronger person. Pain is a good teacher. I hope things are going better for you now. Learn from this. I wish you the best of luck!
 
There is a lot written here but it really all comes down to that in it's simplicity. You take out the sex, the drinking, the trauma, the hotness, the dysfunction, and what are you really left with? And is whatever that is worth it? Then put in the work and make it happen. On the other hand, if what you're left with isn't worth it? Then move along, or move away, or just make a decision and do that. But stay in control and run your life. Because it sounds like your life is running you. The tail is wagging the dog. That's not a good place to be.

Good luck and best wishes.
I agree 100%. When I read the story, all I saw was comments about how good the sex was and how hot she was. Was there a lot more to the relationship than that, or was that most of the attraction? Was there an intellectual attraction there? A good relationship has to be built on more than that. If she left the next day after having one "fight" and bad sex then she isnt worth fighting for IMO.

To me it sounds like you dodged a big bullet. There are plenty of other good looking women out there, and one is sure to click better with you and not have all of the personal problems.

I dont recall the OP mentioning his age. How old are you? If youre only in your late 20s or early 30s, then there is no big rush to find "the one".
 

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