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Keep living together or take the hit to the wallet?

PYGMY

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So my girl of 5 years and I are breaking up. Thing is, I wanna fucking leave like NOW, I’m tired of her shit, but we’re in a locked lease together until the end of April.

We split the rent and it’s a $1,000 a month a piece. So $2,000 in total. I can afford to leave and get a new place and also pay my half of the rent on this house until the lease is up in April but it’s gonna really tighten up my fun money. Or I can just try to cohabitate with her for the next 4 months.

We’ve agreed to play nice if we have to live together until April but I feel like I will still be going out of my kind in that situation.

What would you guys do?
 

Matsuo Munefusa

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Pay her out in a lump sum and move on if you're SURE. When I broke up with my partner of 5 years I ended up paying her $10,000 so she could get her life started again without having to be thrown into turmoil. Our lease was up and I wasn't married, it just seemed like the right thing to do in my situation. Nobody had done anything "wrong" per se, we just weren't meant to be together. I think my liquid net worth was around $30,000 at the time so it didn't cripple me.

Money is really pretty irrelevant in comparison to your happiness and your morals.
 

goback2013

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leave now.. its worth it to have less 'fun money' then for things to escalate and you end up with a DV case for whatever reason.
she knows you guys are on the outs, and nothing would satisfy her more than to see you locked up cause you just happened to bump into her while walking past each other
in a tight living space of the house.
hell you dont even need something physical to happen.. just have her claim you yelled at her or made some terroristic threat.. and youre gone.

i had a female just the other day get sloppy drunk on me and her demeanor changed from pleasant to yelling and almost being physical.
i dont drink, so i just left her house, made sure the cameras saw me hugging her bye, and the next day she called to apologize.

needless to say i dont mess with that one..

i could be wrong about your situation, only you can be the judge of that.. but based on my experiences with scorned women, i just leave em where i found em.

life is too good to be fucked up by some vengeful female.
 

Matsuo Munefusa

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leave now.. its worth it to have less 'fun money' then for things to escalate and you end up with a DV case for whatever reason.
she knows you guys are on the outs, and nothing would satisfy her more than to see you locked up cause you just happened to bump into her while walking past each other
in a tight living space of the house.
hell you dont even need something physical to happen.. just have her claim you yelled at her or made some terroristic threat.. and youre gone.

i had a female just the other day get sloppy drunk on me and her demeanor changed from pleasant to yelling and almost being physical.
i dont drink, so i just left her house, made sure the cameras saw me hugging her bye, and the next day she called to apologize.

needless to say i dont mess with that one..

i could be wrong about your situation, only you can be the judge of that.. but based on my experiences with scorned women, i just leave em where i found em.

life is too good to be fucked up by some vengeful female.
You're projecting on to his situation. Honestly man, half or more of your posts on this site are about banging chicks. You seem to not be very emotionally mature especially in regards to women. You might not be the best candidate to be handing out relationship advice, agree?
 

goback2013

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not projecting at all.. i'm simply saying what happens these days with the modern western woman.. see larry wheels.
you have to be very careful with break ups, especially when shared living expenses are involved.
the woman controls everything.

i deal with said modern woman accordingly.. call it what you like.. but for the most part these females are fucking and moving just like men.
so different strokes..
that said, still appreciate your insight on gear and other aspects of the game.




You're projecting on to his situation. Honestly man, half or more of your posts on this site are about banging chicks. You seem to not be very emotionally mature especially in regards to women. You might not be the best candidate to be handing out relationship advice, agree?
 

Matsuo Munefusa

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not projecting at all.. i'm simply saying what happens these days with the modern western woman.. see larry wheels.
you have to be very careful with break ups, especially when shared living expenses are involved.
the woman controls everything.

i deal with said modern woman accordingly.. call it what you like.. but for the most part these females are fucking and moving just like men.
so different strokes..
that said, still appreciate your insight on gear and other aspects of the game.
I mean, it entirely depends on the woman, you can't generalize across women like that just like you can't generalize across men. The category "woman" is simply too diverse to do so. My experience with women is completely different than yours. I've been with dozens of women casually but I'm on my third +5 year relationship now in my late 30s. The first two break ups were very amicable if not a little heartbreaking. Neither of those women would have fought with me or lied to the police about me or anything like what you talk about. I chose fairly wisely. YMMV (and does, apparently).
 

juggy38

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Leave. I’m going through a divorce right now and in the beginning of “time apart and working on things” it was ok fornlike a week. Then she became vicious.

It will be pure fucking hell. (More than likely). Women don’t let anything go or “get over” damage. Every wrong you ever did will be thrown at you daily.

I vote get out. $5000 to up and leave and never look back? Hell yes. Worth every penny
 

PYGMY

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Pay her out in a lump sum and move on if you're SURE. When I broke up with my partner of 5 years I ended up paying her $10,000 so she could get her life started again without having to be thrown into turmoil. Our lease was up and I wasn't married, it just seemed like the right thing to do in my situation. Nobody had done anything "wrong" per se, we just weren't meant to be together. I think my liquid net worth was around $30,000 at the time so it didn't cripple me.

Money is really pretty irrelevant in comparison to your happiness and your morals.
Definitely leave. Mentally, that living situation is not healthy.
Leave. I’m going through a divorce right now and in the beginning of “time apart and working on things” it was ok fornlike a week. Then she became vicious.

It will be pure fucking hell. (More than likely). Women don’t let anything go or “get over” damage. Every wrong you ever did will be thrown at you daily.

I vote get out. $5000 to up and leave and never look back? Hell yes. Worth every penny


That’s what I’m thinking too. This is going to be a hard one to get over and continuing to live together is going to make that impossible. I’ll be stuck in limbo until I can put her and the home we made together in my rear view mirror and start processing all this. I’ve already paid January’s rent and probably wouldn’t be out until the end of the month anyways so it’s really only $3k I’d be losing.
 

juggy38

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That’s what I’m thinking too. This is going to be a hard one to get over and continuing to live together is going to make that impossible. I’ll be stuck in limbo until I can put her and the home we made together in my rear view mirror and start processing all this. I’ve already paid January’s rent and probably wouldn’t be out until the end of the month anyways so it’s really only $3k I’d be losing.

I promise you, there are guys married, or in the middle of divorces that would pay 3x that to just go.

You can’t get on with life, you will be in a bad place for your mentality, it will be bad.

And when you do go, you will probably feel the burden of stress from a poor relationship feel like you just shucked a 4 plate squat off your back
 

N.L....M.....

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First I’ve gotta say sorry for the situation.
When I left my ex the best thing I did at the time was literally pack a bag of clothes and leave. We cared about eachother but it was just a toxic situation. The first night on my own it felt like I had finally remembered what it felt like to relax and actually breathe for the first time in 3 years. You can’t put a price on mental health and well-being.
 

Sosa123

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So my girl of 5 years and I are breaking up. Thing is, I wanna fucking leave like NOW, I’m tired of her shit, but we’re in a locked lease together until the end of April.

We split the rent and it’s a $1,000 a month a piece. So $2,000 in total. I can afford to leave and get a new place and also pay my half of the rent on this house until the lease is up in April but it’s gonna really tighten up my fun money. Or I can just try to cohabitate with her for the next 4 months.

We’ve agreed to play nice if we have to live together until April but I feel like I will still be going out of my kind in that situation.

What would you guys do?

I would wait till april or at least March!!!! Stick it through bro u got this !!!! Im tired of her shit for you !!!! Youre at the home stretch!
 

PYGMY

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First I’ve gotta say sorry for the situation.
When I left my ex the best thing I did at the time was literally pack a bag of clothes and leave. We cared about eachother but it was just a toxic situation. The first night on my own it felt like I had finally remembered what it felt like to relax and actually breathe for the first time in 3 years. You can’t put a price on mental health and well-being.

Thanks man. It’s been hard. And I know it’s going to get even harder before I get over the hump and start feeling better. We were both in a pretty low spot when we first met and had built so much together over the past 5 years. I’ll be losing a lot from this. I can’t stay in this situation though. We’ve been trying to make it work for the past year and it just ends up being 2 steps forward and 3 steps back again and again.
 

PYGMY

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I would wait till april or at least March!!!! Stick it through bro u got this !!!! Im tired of her shit for you !!!! Youre at the home stretch!

Haha! I don’t know dude, I think the first time she gets all dolled up and looking sexy as shit and goes out for the night and doesn’t come back till the next morning I’m going to be sitting at home alone chewing my fingernails to the bone replaying the nightmare scenario in my mind over and over that she’s getting spit roasted by a gang of gigantic, shredded and insanely good looking guys who are just drilling the shit out of every hole in her body and she’s loving every second of it.

Of course that’s a ridiculous thing to imagine and would most definitely be as far from the truth as it could get, but that’s how my mind works during times like this.
 

goback2013

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shes deeply interwoven into your dopamine/reward circuit .. so you'll feel that way living at the house or on your own.
its the tough part of a breakup.. knowing that now she is getting railed by someone else and possibly liking it.
it may take 6months.. it may take a year, but you'll eventually get over it.
i felt the same way in all my long term relationships.. now i dont care if i see any of them getting banged by multiple dudes
with nut dripping off their(her) chin..
in fact, one relationship that took me almost 3 years to get over(broke up in 2013), i sexed her a few times in the summer of 2020.
just wasnt the same.. and this time she wanted to rekindle the relationship.. i just wasnt feeling it the same way.
this female looks like haile berry, just bad to the bone.. but now, i'm just over it along with my infatuation with her.
point is.. youll find yourself in the same mental place(peaceful) within the next 6months or so. probably in a much better relationship too(if you choose to go that route again..)
 

PYGMY

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shes deeply interwoven into your dopamine/reward circuit .. so you'll feel that way living at the house or on your own.
its the tough part of a breakup.. knowing that now she is getting railed by someone else and possibly liking it.
it may take 6months.. it may take a year, but you'll eventually get over it.
i felt the same way in all my long term relationships.. now i dont care if i see any of them getting banged by multiple dudes
with nut dripping off their(her) chin..
in fact, one relationship that took me almost 3 years to get over(broke up in 2013), i sexed her a few times in the summer of 2020.
just wasnt the same.. and this time she wanted to rekindle the relationship.. i just wasnt feeling it the same way.
this female looks like haile berry, just bad to the bone.. but now, i'm just over it along with my infatuation with her.
point is.. youll find yourself in the same mental place(peaceful) within the next 6months or so. probably in a much better relationship too(if you choose to go that route again..)

Yeah, getting over someone sexually is weird.

About 9 months before I got with this current girl I had just got out of a 12 year relationship with a different woman. And from day one of that relationship being over I really didn’t give a shit what she did or who she did it with. Despite being with her for 12 years and truly loving her at one time. I think mostly because for the last 2 years we were together I was “done-done”. So when we finally said goodbye I was already all the way over it.

But then during that 9 months before I met this girl I’m with now I had an on again off again tumultuous relationship with this one chick that just drove me nuts with jealousy every time I’d think about what she was doing during our off times. I never loved her and never imagined spending my life with her but there was just something about her that I wanted all for myself and the thought of her giving that to another guy drove me bonkers. I didn’t really get over it until I met the woman this thread is about.
 

PYGMY

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Well, finally did it.

After I made the original post we kept going back and forth and against both our better judgments we decided to give it one last try.

When the lease renewal came up we took me off the lease and left her on it just incase it didn’t work out so it would be easier and cheaper for me to leave. That was the only smart decision we made during all this.

That was back in April. We made it to the beginning of June before we realized there was just no salvaging our relationship.

I finally moved into my own place last week. The first 4 days or so I was just fine. I was actually surprised by how ok I was. I was thinking… “Shit, this is going to be easier than I thought.” Then a couple days ago it all hit me and I’ve been pretty down. All the typical shit. Missing her, feeling lonely, thinking about all the good times, dreading having to start all over with someone new eventually when I’m ready for that, wondering if I’ll even be able to find someone new that I can feel as strongly for as I once did for my ex…

Woke up today feeling so-so. I know it’s just going to take time but damn this shit is hard and I’m getting to old for it.
 

Matsuo Munefusa

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You know all these feelings. We all know them - wondering if you’ll ever find somebody as amazing again? Yep, been there. You have too.

Fact is there are literally a never ending group of amazing spectacular mind boggling hot very cool women out there. You know that.

Just focus on yourself awhile and get your head straight then you’ll be ready to date again.
 

PYGMY

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You know all these feelings. We all know them - wondering if you’ll ever find somebody as amazing again? Yep, been there. You have too.

Fact is there are literally a never ending group of amazing spectacular mind boggling hot very cool women out there. You know that.

Just focus on yourself awhile and get your head straight then you’ll be ready to date again.
Thank you, brother. I needed to hear that.
 

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