Laziness? Disrespect? Entitlement? Or all three?

[Mike Arnold]

This is not something I would normally put up a thread for, but I am truly curious if any of the other long-time members here have experienced what I am about to explain.

Have any of you ever received pm's from people you don't know...who have little to no post history...who demand an answer to their questions...who are too lazy to use even semi-decent grammar (e.g., no periods, comas, or capitalization, essentially leaving you to guess what they're actually asking/saying)..and who show zero thanks for your time? It almost comes across as if they think you're just a little bitch-slave who exists solely for no other reason than to decipher their unintelligible mess of letters, while having absolutely no idea that their entire approach lacks both gratitude and respect.

Look, I have absolutely no problem helping people when they have questions (assuming their questions are reasonable from a time investment standpoint) and I am often happy to do so, but when someone insists that I educate them about a complex subject, without even taking the time to properly explain themselves, show basic respect, or demonstrate even the slightest bit of appreciation for my time, I have a problem. This isn't a common occurrence, but when it does happen, it makes me ask myself "what is going on in someone's head, to make them think that this is an acceptable way to approach someone for a favor?"

If anyone here has experienced something similar, feel free to let us know.

 

[Doitagain]

Every fu*king day. All of the above.
Regret replying every single time.

 

[iron lifter]

It happens all the time, even in person at the gym. Sometimes we become the go-to guy, and it gets very tiring. At least research and do your homework before putting together a proper question.

 

[iwantmass]

Go to the provider's session channel. It is really amusing the stuff that gets asked in there. I just have to turn it off until I'm ready to order

 

[Fa Seeshus]

Not just the internet, people asking questions in the gym with no manners. Nowadays just best not to answer.

 

[Treadstone71]

Seems like it happens a lot irl (general public) too. To the point where I’m now an asshole and straight up ignore 90% people. I usually love to help but seems like people ask in the entitled manner you’re describing, worst of all, they don’t even say thank you or anything. So now I’m at the point where I’m just a complete dick with no remorse.

 

[Denkall75!]

It seems to be the norm nowadays that folks just want the answers in lieu of research. I always look forward to research. I would imagine for some it’s “just a hobby” and for others that seek their knowledge through research, it’s very similar to a religion. I would probably be considered old school but have always believed that knowledge easily gained is easily lost.

 

[Green Miles]

People do it in person! I don't know who raised them, but Mowgli had better mannerisms!

 

[AllOkJumpmaster]

Yes 100 percent.

The thing is, I tend to be very empathetic, and helpful in nature. Many people helped me when I was starting out, so, I tend to just help them. I'm not talking about full on coaching, but answer questions, sure. I enjoy the research, learning, and practical application. I also compete, coach, and run HP for US SoF, so it is pretty much my life lol. I think young guys get overwhelmed with trying to be "Optimal" and in doing so, just end up hopping around and spin their wheels. The Internet and phones have been an incredible innovation with regards to access to information, but it also overwhelms young guys about what / they should do things.

Idk, I am agreeing with everything you said, but I also enjoy helping people.

 

[3BILLS]

Yes 100 percent.

The thing is, I tend to be very empathetic, and helpful in nature. Many people helped me when I was starting out, so, I tend to just help them. I'm not talking about full on coaching, but answer questions, sure. I enjoy the research, learning, and practical application. I also compete, coach, and run HP for US SoF, so it is pretty much my life lol. I think young guys get overwhelmed with trying to be "Optimal" and in doing so, just end up hopping around and spin their wheels. The Internet and phones have been an incredible innovation with regards to access to information, but it also overwhelms young guys about what / they should do things.

Idk, I am agreeing with everything you said, but I also enjoy helping people.

Do they know your natty though?

 

[romo]

This is not something I would normally put up a thread for, but I am truly curious if any of the other long-time members here have experienced what I am about to explain.

Have any of you ever received pm's from people you don't know...who have little to no post history...who demand an answer to their questions...who are too lazy to use even semi-decent grammar (e.g., no periods, comas, or capitalization, essentially leaving you to guess what they're actually asking/saying)..and who show zero thanks for your time? It almost comes across as if they think you're just a little bitch-slave who exists solely for no other reason than to decipher their unintelligible mess of letters, while having absolutely no idea that their entire approach lacks both gratitude and respect.

Look, I have absolutely no problem helping people when they have questions (assuming their questions are reasonable from a time investment standpoint) and I am often happy to do so, but when someone insists that I educate them about a complex subject, without even taking the time to properly explain themselves, show basic respect, or demonstrate even the slightest bit of appreciation for my time, I have a problem. This isn't a common occurrence, but when it does happen, it makes me ask myself "what is going on in someone's head, to make them think that this is an acceptable way to approach someone for a favor?"

If anyone here has experienced something similar, feel free to let us know.

I bet you do get a lot of this, with your education on this stuff and being well established. Now me, i do not get questioned very often lol.

 

[AllOkJumpmaster]

Do they know your natty though?

Not sure if that is a dig or not, lol.

 

[Fa Seeshus]

My favorite is when they ask you for advice and then immediately give an excuse as to why they can't do your suggestion.

You then realize they were never going to do anything, and the conversation they are having with you is a 'self feel-good' trick so that they feel like they are doing something about their fitness.

When I was a trainer I got to the point of directly calling out this BS. Now that I don't get paid to deal with it, I have even less tolerance.

 

[KillerStack]

My problem is I'm too timid to PM people with questions, not wanting to inconvenience them lol. And sometimes when you do you might get a jackass reply which messes with mood for a moment

A thank you is absolutely required if someone gets an earnest reply

 

[AllOkJumpmaster]

My problem is I'm too timid to PM people with questions, not wanting to inconvenience them lol. And sometimes when you do you might get a jackass reply which messes with mood for a moment

A thank you is absolutely required if someone gets an earnest reply

Right, I could never even fathom DM'ing, or even making a post here with a question without spending hours / days scouring this site's past post, or others.

If you see someone on here with obvious knowledge of something, just look at their post history and you are almost always able to find the answer. Because they have to other just provided it, or they have answered someone else that had the same question.

 

[buck]

If you guys were like me and just come across as a grumpy old man that was a dumb ass would not have this issue. Problem solved.

 

[KillerStack]

Right, I could never even fathom DM'ing, or even making a post here with a question without spending hours / days scouring this site's past post, or others.

If you see someone on here with obvious knowledge of something, just look at their post history and you are almost always able to find the answer. Because they have to other just provided it, or they have answered someone else that had the same question.

Yes though same questions and debates are rehashed over and over again even by vets, everyone wants fresh perspectives or else there would be little to talk about. Of course some are completely against reading anything, but many people are like that. Most people just watch videos, reading is old school lol. Most successful bodybuilders never read any forums or "research" anything

I'm sure you could use an AI to scour professionalmuscle for an answer to a specific question. Then use that Deep Research AI to fact check the answer. I haven't used AI at all so far. On another forum a long time poster suddenly replied to threads with freaking perfect grammar and logic and it was obviously "him" posting yet not, and at first I was very confused

 

[Fa Seeshus]

My problem is I'm too timid to PM people with questions, not wanting to inconvenience them lol. And sometimes when you do you might get a jackass reply which messes with mood for a moment

A thank you is absolutely required if someone gets an earnest reply

How many times do I have to PM to tell you that "PeePee hole" is the preferred injection site for most compounds!?!?

F%#$^%G newbies...

 

[psychor]

This is not something I would normally put up a thread for, but I am truly curious if any of the other long-time members here have experienced what I am about to explain.

Have any of you ever received pm's from people you don't know...who have little to no post history...who demand an answer to their questions...who are too lazy to use even semi-decent grammar (e.g., no periods, comas, or capitalization, essentially leaving you to guess what they're actually asking/saying)..and who show zero thanks for your time? It almost comes across as if they think you're just a little bitch-slave who exists solely for no other reason than to decipher their unintelligible mess of letters, while having absolutely no idea that their entire approach lacks both gratitude and respect.

Look, I have absolutely no problem helping people when they have questions (assuming their questions are reasonable from a time investment standpoint) and I am often happy to do so, but when someone insists that I educate them about a complex subject, without even taking the time to properly explain themselves, show basic respect, or demonstrate even the slightest bit of appreciation for my time, I have a problem. This isn't a common occurrence, but when it does happen, it makes me ask myself "what is going on in someone's head, to make them think that this is an acceptable way to approach someone for a favor?"

If anyone here has experienced something similar, feel free to let us know.

This kind of conduct and attitude is totally disrespectful and uncalled for. As you alluded to, it stems from a lack of respect for others due to a feeling of SELF-entitlement. I try to always show gratitude and appreciation for others time and contributions and couldn't imagine not showing or voicing gratitude. It's just how I was brought up. I am especially appreciative to the board contributors who have an increased knowledge, expertise and/or experience who freely share what they have. It's because of the contributions of these members that sets this board apart and makes it a great place to learn and grow.

 

[psychor]

My favorite is when they ask you for advice and then immediately give an excuse as to why they can't do your suggestion.

You then realize they were never going to do anything, and the conversation they are having with you is a 'self feel-good' trick so that they feel like they are doing something about their fitness.

When I was a trainer I got to the point of directly calling out this BS. Now that I don't get paid to deal with it, I have even less tolerance.

I can relate Bro, unfortunately! Like when I get asked by someone who says they want to "get big" and I simply tell them to eat more or increase their calories and they reply with something like, "I tried that but it didn't work"!(smh) Or, when someone asks me how I "get cut" and I tell them I cut carbs and they say "oh...I can't do that.." I then just try to get away as quickly as possible because I realize I'm wasting my breath and time.