prenuptial agreements-Need Advice

[dragonfire101]

I was wondering if a prenuptial agreement is needed for myself before I get married. My fiance is willing to sign one. Ther are alot of young guys at work who ended up divorce and and lost there condo or house that they owned befor marriage have to pay alimony, health insurance and even their ex wives student loans. Me and my finace have different views on money. She feels that whats mine is hers once we get married. I don't agree. I don't want to sound pestistic , but the divorce rate is 50%. I wan to be protected.

I am not rich. I own my own condo, my student loans are paid and my credit good. I make about twice as much money as she does and my medical insurance is the cheapest and best possible since I work for the State I reside in. She also has no creidt and alot of student loans and bills.

I just want the prenuptial to state that any alimony would be waived and what loans coming in before the marriage are the responsibility of that individual. Also that what assets my condo/vehicle would remain mine. Now if we upgraded to a house while married I am willing to go 50/50 on the homes value. I would even be willing to pay for medical insurance as it is only $20 extra a month for another individual added. Also any money won while married I would be willing to split 50/50.

 

[dragonfire101]

Bump, Anybody. I know half the bros on this board must be married and half of the ones married divorced.

 

[maxsupplements]

dg101,

well, lets see bro... i was married. and divorced, but fortunately, my ex didnt try to clean me out. now, if you feel that she might, then you should make one up..


just go talk to a lawyer, tell them how you want to be protected, and such.

i will say this, if you dont trust her now, then how can you after the papers are signed? i dont really wish i had done one. my ex never stopped working. that is what determines alimony, whether or not she quits working when you get married. then you will have to pay alimony if you get a divorce to suport her.

i would say get it. write it for 3 years. see what happens from there..

i sell houses, if you roll the equity of this property into another house that has both of your names on it, then you will forfeit the proceeds of the sale of that house IF you get a divorce. she could ask for half of the proceeds from the sale. so, if you can. put the house in your name always. its harder that way, but if you can somehow explain it to her, then you are a badass!

but just a little .02 for ya there..

 

[JETHRO TULL]

I personally believe in them.

The marriage is a contract. A legally binding situation. Why not figure out some guidelines and agree to them? I think it is the only way to go.

 

[speedbacker]

In my opinion, if you think there's even a chance now, you guys might get divorced once married, then I wouldn't even go through with the marriage. Marriage is for life. At least that's my opinion.

 

[JETHRO TULL]

Speedbacker, I respect your opinion.

In my opinion, if you think there's even a chance now, you guys might get divorced once married, then I wouldn't even go through with the marriage. Marriage is for life. At least that's my opinion.

Let me just throw this out there. I have been in a number of weddings, best man at one, groomsman in several, and attended an assload of friends weddings.

I have seen two people stand up there and exchange vows with commitment and passion, swearing love until death do us part.

Two years later I have seen those same two people despise and try to hurt each other with equal passion.

You never know what life will bring.

 

[lynx]

I was wondering if a prenuptial agreement is needed for myself before I get married. My fiance is willing to sign one. Ther are alot of young guys at work who ended up divorce and and lost there condo or house that they owned befor marriage have to pay alimony, health insurance and even their ex wives student loans. Me and my finace have different views on money. She feels that whats mine is hers once we get married. I don't agree. I don't want to sound pestistic , but the divorce rate is 50%. I wan to be protected.

I am not rich. I own my own condo, my student loans are paid and my credit good. I make about twice as much money as she does and my medical insurance is the cheapest and best possible since I work for the State I reside in. She also has no creidt and alot of student loans and bills.

I just want the prenuptial to state that any alimony would be waived and what loans coming in before the marriage are the responsibility of that individual. Also that what assets my condo/vehicle would remain mine. Now if we upgraded to a house while married I am willing to go 50/50 on the homes value. I would even be willing to pay for medical insurance as it is only $20 extra a month for another individual added. Also any money won while married I would be willing to split 50/50.

I think it would be a good idea. Especially because of certain things you said in your post. So if what yours is hers then she will be thinking that come divorce time if there is a divorce.

 

[bulldog21]

The way you want your prenup structured is a good way of going about doing it I think....I believe in them too...

Whats yours before she walked into your life and before you got married is yours and whatever assets you you garner while married should be shared....Its simple easy and very fair way of going about things imo......

 

[speedbacker]

Let me just throw this out there. I have been in a number of weddings, best man at one, groomsman in several, and attended an assload of friends weddings.

I have seen two people stand up there and exchange vows with commitment and passion, swearing love until death do us part.

Two years later I have seen those same two people despise and try to hurt each other with equal passion.

You never know what life will bring.

JT- I hate to admit it but you're right. It's too bad things like that happen so often.

 

[dragonfire101]

In my opinion, if you think there's even a chance now, you guys might get divorced once married, then I wouldn't even go through with the marriage. Marriage is for life. At least that's my opinion.

Yes agree, but you can't predict the future. I think as the prenup as an insurance plan. You hope you never need it, but its there just in case.

Two years later I have seen those same two people despise and try to hurt each other with equal passion.

I trust my fiance fully, but human nature predicts that when someone is hurt, they may do anything to get back at another even if that was not thier intent.

My finace is in full agreemnt with the prenup I proposed. I just need to find an attorney and get a quote on how much it will cost to write up. Also I have to check the laws in my state to see if prenups are even upheld before I even iniatiate the process.

 

[panther]

As someone who got taken to the cleaners, I would definitely advise you to get a prenup. I was 12 years older than my now exwife so I had considerable more assets than she did. I thought marriage was for life and madly in love and didn't get a prenup. Well, she divorced me after 7 years and got half of all assets since our funds were commingled. I was able to document my holdings before the marriage, but it didn't matter (at least in CA). I got used for a green card and then lost a lot of money in the divorce.

Breakups are nasty so don't tell her you do super supplements as it could be used against you. I had told her, but not where it was hidden so it couldn't be turned over to LE.

Better single than sorry.

 

[ScorpioGirl]

In my opinion, if you think there's even a chance now, you guys might get divorced once married, then I wouldn't even go through with the marriage. Marriage is for life. At least that's my opinion.

I agree 100%. Yah, you never know what will happen down the road, so you'd better have one hell of a strong bond to get you through it - together.

 

[skookum]

One of the other guys nailed it on the head...Marriage is a contract & is for
a (unknown) prescribed amount of time - there is a beginning, a middle and an end. God willing, you're marriage will be beautiful, strong & for the remainder of your natural life. Unfortunately, that wasn't my experience & I took a serious routing on the exit. I wouldn't get married again without a pre-nup. Plain & simple. Remember, there's a very fine line between love and hate. They're both very intense emotions...