Razorcuts...
First of all, I think you need to cut yourself some slack. I think, for the most part, your intentions here were good. Yes, you screwed up by misrepresenting yourself and your credibility with these guys is pretty much shot. But I don't believe you are a mean-spirited person and I don't think you are a scammer. If you were, you a) would be long gone and off to your next set of "victims," and b) wouldn't care less what these guys thought.
With that said, however, I do think you would probably benefit from seeking some professional help to deal with these inderlying identity and insecurity issues. Not only that, but your calculated manipulation of others has me a little concerned. How many hours did you spend helping these guys by answering pm's, writing (or copying articles), posting as more than one person... all the while knowing full well you weren't who you represented yourself to be??
I applaud you for at least admitting your mistakes and realizing that you need help, but flaming yourself and the "I deserve to be punished" bit isn't working. The damage is done. And I certainly don't blame these guys for being pissed.
Time to be a stand-up guy. Make it right. Not for these guys here. But for yourself and your family.
Good luck to you.