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The important things in life

CB

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I've been talking to Jethro about this subject a lot lately, and i wanted to see how everyone else on here feels. I've been noticing a considerable amount of quality competitors leaving the competition scene lately. All of them have the same thing to say: " I want to get back to the more important aspects of life, and focus on being happy". Even Jenny Henderschott just backed out of the fitness Olympia to focus on her business and family. I've watched my wife focus on this sport for the past three years, and i have to say that they were three very difficult years. The sport was never pure, but what purity there used to be is long gone. It doesn't matter how great you look if you don't have a big name trainer, or are lucky enough to have someone put your name out there. They are constantly on the edge of obsession, and always on the verge of an eating disorder, to simply get overlooked come contest day. Talk about getting mentally crushed. I am thrilled each time i read about another one stepping aside to focus on life again.

I know this was half bitch and half rant, but JT has really reminded me what is important in life. He lives a very simple life, but in my opinion, that man has it all.
 
Yes CB, if one can't find the balance with both bodybuilding and life, then I believe that can cause problems with loved ones, the mind, etc...When I was prepping this year, I had that as a major goal, but I saw it as my goal, not my life. It is good to have goals, but bad to have addictions, they will eat you from the inside to the outside! Bodybuilding can be addicting at times, but we just need to step back and take an honest look at it. For me, I would take a step back and look into my wifes eyes and if she looked unhappy due to all the stress from prepping I would kick myself for it. You can bodybuild and live, just need to find how to do that for you. Do not allow it to become overwhelming, but keep it exciting in all aspects (JT is a perfect example of that - He bodybuilds and seems to be really living life up and has agreat gal in his life)! Goals are good things!

But, like you said, if you get to the point of the sport controlling your mind and life, then I think it is time to step back and away to relax...refocus to what really matters in life.
 
Well I think what that really goes to is at what point in your life the "important things" change.

Now that I am in law school and without kids, the "important things" in my life are to get a job with a big firm and start making money. Use that money to make more money and pay off student loans.

However, that being said I have talked to plenty of people who have worked in those big firms with a big salary and once they decide to start a family the important things change and they take different jobs.

A guy like JT is happy living the simple life because that is what HE wants. My dad is the same way, and while I don't have the same interests as he does I can understand why he is happy living the simple life. Some people like things to be less simple. Look at a guy like Big A who is out there making the big bucks. I think even he had a post a long long time ago about a friend of his who came from bankruptcy to being a multimillionaire (with some really cool pictures as well). If that is what your priorities are then I am willing to bet you will be happy chasing the big bucks.

I think the same thing goes for the sport in question. There are politics, obsessions, rampant drug use/abuse..... but if that is your goal... well that's your goal. The people who give it up are simply switching priorities.

The only purity you will find in a sport are the kinds being played in sandlots and backyards.
 
agree

I appreciate this post even more because is what I think about, especially lately......most will not listen, or understand the importance of living, really living...with your family and friends...to be trully happy with yourself and others.

It takes YOU to make that happen...so, if you are selfish, you will have others be selfish towards you, if you think of others around you, others that have always has been there, you will get so much more than you would ever expect....

Yes, bodybuilding is a selfish sport, so try not to compete all the time if your family suffers, is not worth it...you can balance it, but you need to do it right.

CB thanks for this as it needs to be said at times to remind some who are just starting out down this road.........
 
Yes

I completely agree. Balance and moderation in everything is key. You only get one shot at this life, don't squander it on something that's meaningless at the end of the road
 
Balance and moderation in everything is key.

I sometimes wonder about this idea. If it is better to put all of your efforts into only a few skills/trades/sports/professions and become very good at whatever it is those things are, or do you take the time to be fairly good at the multitude of the aforementioned things.

I think it is tough to have it both ways, and sometimes balance and moderation is not key. Sometimes you have to go full tilt in life with certain things. I think it is more about what the individual craves.

I just think about books like Fountainhead or Atlas Shrugged and subscribe to that sort of action. Do what you are good at and do the hell out of it.

Maybe I am wrong on this though. I am only 24 so who knows?
 
Its ironic that you mention this thread CB as ive talked to a couple of my patients about something very similar today.....getting back to your 'roots' and downsizing.

Bodybuilding use to consume my every thought when i was younger....i had no aspirations of becoming a Pro or anything....but just loved it. Having my child was the 1st eye opener for me about needing to balance life and enjoy.

I lift now because i just love to lift....like some like to play golf. I compete now not go get in magazines or win the Jr nationals or whatever big title....but just to enjoy the process and see what kind of discipline i still have. It breaks up the monotony of my life and gives me a goal to try to achieve.
 
...The sport was never pure, but what purity there used to be is long gone. It doesn't matter how great you look if you don't have a big name trainer, or are lucky enough to have someone put your name out there. They are constantly on the edge of obsession, and always on the verge of an eating disorder, to simply get overlooked come contest day. Talk about getting mentally crushed. I am thrilled each time i read about another one stepping aside to focus on life again.

I know this was half bitch ...

Just wondering if you compete. Also wondering why, if you view someone stepping outside the world of physique competition as a good thing, you spend your time on a board dedicated to bodybuilding.
 
bodybuilding is what ya make it.. if you let it consume ya and neglect your family it is not bodybuildings fault.. it is yours.. no one should have to let it consume your every thought.. as i have said before, each meal takes 10 minutes to eat.. a workout is a hour.. that leaves a lot of of time to devote to family , job , other hobbies.. those who back out of the competitive world and give the reasons you state either are just burnt out or they let it consume them.. but remember, everything in this endevor is a choice.. make the right one..
 
I love bodybuilding.. but I'm not a competitive bodybuilder. It's a hobby/lifestyle.

It doesn't take up that much time for me anymore.. I don't get fat but I don't necessarily eat "clean" either. I can go out and eat whenever I want as long as I don't go overboard at home.

I think doing it for the love of it (and for me the love is not being ripped to the bone, rather lifting heavy weights, experimenting with new exercises/supps, and being big) is the best for overall health and a good life.

Just look at Victor Richards..that's a true bodybuilder to me. Doing it for the love of it yet still living life.


Edit: Just to make it clear; i still think you can compete and have a balanced life.... but maybe not compete more than once a year or so. And just do it relaxed in the offseason... maybe not Levrone-relaxed, but have fun with it.
 
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Just wondering if you compete. Also wondering why, if you view someone stepping outside the world of physique competition as a good thing, you spend your time on a board dedicated to bodybuilding.

I don't compete, but have lifted seriously for years. My wife competes, and many of my friends do. I really enjoy lifting, but never really wanted to take the next step towards competition. I usually just get to listen to many voices venting after competitions:) I admire anyone who has the drive to get up on that stage, and even more for those that do it for the love of training, and not just to get attention. The love of training is what i think this board was created from.

I had no intentions of writing my feelings here, but JT brought it out in me. We spent a lot of time together at the LA championships and the USA's. The big, goofy guy really makes you think. I don't think i've ever seen anyone smile and laugh as much as he does, either:)
 
Couldn't have said it better. I am much the same way.

I love bodybuilding.. but I'm not a competitive bodybuilder. It's a hobby/lifestyle.

It doesn't take up that much time for me anymore.. I don't get fat but I don't necessarily eat "clean" either. I can go out and eat whenever I want as long as I don't go overboard at home.

I think doing it for the love of it (and for me the love is not being ripped to the bone, rather lifting heavy weights, experimenting with new exercises/supps, and being big) is the best for overall health and a good life.

Just look at Victor Richards..that's a true bodybuilder to me. Doing it for the love of it yet still living life.


Edit: Just to make it clear; i still think you can compete and have a balanced life.... but maybe not compete more than once a year or so. And just do it relaxed in the offseason... maybe not Levrone-relaxed, but have fun with it.
 
Well, Cole and I sort of had a meeting of the minds on this subject.

[My buddy Lats and I disagree on this subject, but I still love him. :)]

Here is a half-assed quote or a paraphrasing of my friend Lats' statement above-"Oh, this is bodybuilding and it only takes an hour of my day and meals only take 10 minutes."

That might be for someone like you and I Lats...then you'd be 100% correct.

However, I don't think that's accurate for the athlete who competes frequently or who is an unsponsored Pro scrambling to earn a living. [ I know you sure as hell know more pros than I do! However, I have competed and I have lived with competitors and helped others prepare, so I am not totally ignorant on this topic.]

I think for THOSE people the training, diet, cardio, social interactions, are CONSUMED by the time and effort it takes to be your best.

Meals take ten minutes to prepare? It also takes time to sit down and eat those meals and that's another 10minutes AT LEAST. Then you've got clean up. If you are eating six or seven meals that adds up. Plus, you are eating when others are not, you are eating on the clock. Then you've got meals to prepare for everyone else who ISN'T DIETING. [I am speaking of serious competitors, not someone like me how eats whenever cause he's swimming and missed a meal]:)

Then figure in that you are getting up at the ass-crack of dawn to do 40-60 minutes of cardio. Then if you have a job...and you have to earn money....you work all day....THERE GOES ANOTHER 8HOURS..then you come home for one of those "quick" meals...rush off to workout...you are then gone for another hour...minimum and more if you end up doing more cardio. That's another 30-45 minutes, plus travel to and from the gym. Then you come home and what time is it?

Are you tired? Is there much time left to enjoy other interests or relationships? Is there time to study? No, you are dead tired and need some sleep....badly just to maintain that schedule.

Thats right your day is GONE. It's been about YOU. I think it is rare indeed to have a guy like Mark Dugdale who has it together with family etc. Plus, not everyone is so fortunate as to have a huge family business where cash isn't an issue. Even then, I am sure he'd be the first to say that his family makes big sacrifices so he can pursue this goal.

Plus, let's get real, to be successful there are a LOT of other things involved.
Look at the Pros, do most of them have a real job? Do most of them have successful, happy lives that you'd want? What are their relationships like? And what is there once you aren't a young goodlooking guy or a "hot" female? Not much unless you've been one of the fortunate few who are one of the top 10 competitors in the world and actually make a living off the sport.

I think a person better have host of things in life that bring real joy, "things that are important in life" to fall back or it's going to be a tough go.

Do I LOVE lifting and the super cool physiques? YES......BUT I AM NOT one of those people who is willing to get on the spinning wheel like a rat and run someone elses race.

That's just my opinion. If it comes down to a barbeque with friends or not going on a hike in the mountains for fear that I might "overtrain" my legs. The choice is VERY clear for me. That WOULD NOT be the case be for someone at the top of their game and wanting to compete. I am talking about those who want to win and have a shot at it.

Life is good and we all have opinions. It's good to kick things around some. All of you make good points.

It was good talking to you Cole. I am glad you got a kick out of my laughter and overall b.s. We'll have to talk more over a burger in Wallace. :D
 
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I'd like to see a lot of these younger guys go back to school and get an education, living paycheck to paycheck so you can get your next kit of gh is a crappy way to live.
 
Top things in order, that are important in my life:

1. God
2. Family
3. Health (Not BB, just a healthy lifestyle)
4. Friends
5. Everything else
 
Great topic and I agree with almost every post. What I will add is that pushing yourself to be the best in anything can take over your life. It all lies in what you want for yourself and your family. I say this because I am constantly working at balancing my life and all that I want. So far I would say I am doing a pretty good job and all aspects of my life are kicking ass. I have a great woman, family and friends, a successful business, and my bodybuilding goals are slowly being accomplished. Life is good and I feel i am living a dream.

I think bodybuilding becomes a problem when people make it the be all end all of life. I love bodybuilding and chasing a dream but if it all ended tomorrow I would be fine and the rest of my life would still be there for me to enjoy.
 
You know I kinda agree with LATS on this but I can see what JT is saying to...I love this sport alot and I still want to acomplish my goals in it (top 5 at USA or Nationals) and I believe I still can...But, my family, my faith come first...My girls are my life, and without them I wouldnt be able to compete in bodybuilding...

chris
 
Agree

I've been talking to Jethro about this subject a lot lately, and i wanted to see how everyone else on here feels. I've been noticing a considerable amount of quality competitors leaving the competition scene lately. All of them have the same thing to say: " I want to get back to the more important aspects of life, and focus on being happy". Even Jenny Henderschott just backed out of the fitness Olympia to focus on her business and family. I've watched my wife focus on this sport for the past three years, and i have to say that they were three very difficult years. The sport was never pure, but what purity there used to be is long gone. It doesn't matter how great you look if you don't have a big name trainer, or are lucky enough to have someone put your name out there. They are constantly on the edge of obsession, and always on the verge of an eating disorder, to simply get overlooked come contest day. Talk about getting mentally crushed. I am thrilled each time i read about another one stepping aside to focus on life again.

I know this was half bitch and half rant, but JT has really reminded me what is important in life. He lives a very simple life, but in my opinion, that man has it all.

This is why I CRINGE......when someone says, " YOU WILL WIN IT ALL"........or " YOU GOT ROBBED"...........or.......referring to a
" PLACE" ....." Place" does not matter....EXPOSURE does not matter......who cares who sees you in a magazine????....how you feel about what you did MATTERS..........thats ALL....Some people act that if you are not " found" then you are not validated as a person..........if you do not realize this life will be hell............God bless you
 
God - My child - Family - Health is all you need to have a happy life. Anything money can buy you will never make you "truly" happy. Trust me, i know the hard way.
 

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