IMO i dont think you "juiced your brains out" or did anything THAT irresponsible other than avoiding the bloodwork. After 20 years of AAS use your highest dose of test used was 1500mg a week. I don't consider that high at all after 20 years of juicing. What exactly did you do that you regret? Did you not come off or something?
Just my opinion, maybe i am using too much juice... i have been jucing for about 5 years now and am up to 2000mg/week of test prop. I pretty much use test only. I know the dose is high, but at least i'm being honest. I use an AI, dht blocker, hcg throughout and suffer absolutely no side effects. I know my body, and 2g a week is what it needs to really grow. A month ago I finally started using GH for the first time @ 5iu/day 5on/2off. I'm seeing good results. I'm very committed in my training, id say my diet is about a 7 out of 10 with 10 being super strict.
I'm not what i'd like to be though, I really only want arm growth at this point, the size of everything else on me is decent in my mind, and i am simply trying to focus on arms at this point. I know what to do and how to make my back/chest/legs/shoulders grow, but i have not yet figured out my arms. Perhaps if i shifted my attention from arms back to my entire body, they would just eventually catch up, either that or i am just going to have to live with unproportionate arms.......... Sorry i'm rambling.....
Here's a list of what i've used:
1. test prop/enan/sust - test is works best for me and is pretty much all i use now (prop)
2. dbol - this worked great for me to bulk, but i can no longer use, i simply lose my appetite when i try
3. tren - this was great for cutting me up, but eventually this became hard on my liver too, and i no longer plan to use this as well, GH has replaced tren's "purpose" in my cycles of shedding fat/maintaining fat levels while bulking.
4. IGF - did absolutely nothing for me
5. GH - first run on it now, like it alot - makes my muscles full and is helping lose some bodyfat even while bulking
6. insulin - did nothing for me. I was excited at first, as i saw the scale go up, but after my run with slin was over, i feel like most of that growth was water weight and possibly intestinal growth, as i am now left with a larger waist
..... have not run with GH yet, may do so..
7. deca - did nothing for me
8. NPP - did nothing for me
9. EQ - simply add in 400 mgs a week to some cycles to increase vascularity and hunger. that is all it is good for for me.
10. synthol - did not work for me
sorry for the long post