What will/have you told your sons/kids?

[Goody]

Something Ive been thinking about lately...Ive got two little boys...what do you say when the questions start coming about the way you look and why? They allready ask me why the other dads dont look like their dad at the birthdays parties and such..and there not even grade school age yet...
Im guessing the heavy questions will begin in the middle school years and continue all thru highschool...they probaly will hear stuff like "your dads on roids" on the baseball field, football practice field, school....whatever...what do you say? How did you go about answering these questions when they came up? And it will, no doubt, come up...

 

[BillHilton]

As a father of four sons, I will give my opinion and advice.

First, I believe it is important to never lie to your children. I am sure some will disagree with me on that. None of my sons were ever led to believe that Santa Claus was real. I have always told them how much money I made and always showed them the bills that had to be paid. I believe it is our job to raise up productive and honest adults. I have also tried to take any fear out of them telling me the truth. Its ok that you put the ball through the window, but now we are going to work on how you will fix it.

To the subject at hand. I also believe that we should tell them the truth in the context of their understanding. So if they are let's say 10, and they ask why you look like you do, I think a legitimate answer is that "I go to the gym more than most, and I pay attention to my diet and nutrition/supplements in a more advanced way than most."

As they get older, they must also learn that it is prudent to not discuss many things with those outside the small circle of family. It is not that we hide it, we simply don't discuss certain things when there is no good that come from it. As you grow in your trust of their judgment, you can grow in your disclosure to them.

My oldest and I share everything in the knowledge and use of supplements -- I will leave it at that (he is now 24, its been this way for a about 2 years now). He listens to my advice, and I believe that this is because he knows that I have never lied to him. As we approached the point of total enlightenment, I made it clear that there was to be no discussion whatsoever with anyone and certainly no help for any of his friends in procuring cutting edge supplements.

If they are younger, and the questions are more pointed, I still think that you could say something like "I am just more willing to seek out alternatives that others are not." Or, something along those lines.

If you handle this and the rest of life with honesty, I assure you that you will greatly enjoy your relationship with them as they mature.

 

[Gunsmith]

As a father of four sons, I will give my opinion and advice.

First, I believe it is important to never lie to your children. I am sure some will disagree with me on that. None of my sons were ever led to believe that Santa Claus was real. I have always told them how much money I made and always showed them the bills that had to be paid. I believe it is our job to raise up productive and honest adults. I have also tried to take any fear out of them telling me the truth. Its ok that you put the ball through the window, but now we are going to work on how you will fix it.

To the subject at hand. I also believe that we should tell them the truth in the context of their understanding. So if they are let's say 10, and they ask why you look like you do, I think a legitimate answer is that "I go to the gym more than most, and I pay attention to my diet and nutrition/supplements in a more advanced way than most."

As they get older, they must also learn that it is prudent to not discuss many things with those outside the small circle of family. It is not that we hide it, we simply don't discuss certain things when there is no good that come from it. As you grow in your trust of their judgment, you can grow in your disclosure to them.

My oldest and I share everything in the knowledge and use of supplements -- I will leave it at that (he is now 24, its been this way for a about 2 years now). He listens to my advice, and I believe that this is because he knows that I have never lied to him. As we approached the point of total enlightenment, I made it clear that there was to be no discussion whatsoever with anyone and certainly no help for any of his friends in procuring cutting edge supplements.

If they are younger, and the questions are more pointed, I still think that you could say something like "I am just more willing to seek out alternatives that others are not." Or, something along those lines.

If you handle this and the rest of life with honesty, I assure you that you will greatly enjoy your relationship with them as they mature.

that pretty much sums it up

My daughter 14 and wife and never directly asked me if i take steroids (sort of one of those things it doesnt have to be asked) and when anybody ask them they say no. My daughter gets realy pissed when people say stuff like "your dads on juice" because she knows that the supliments is only a small part of the equasion and she explains how much time i spend in the gym , and cooking and prepairing meals and how ive been weight lifting for longer than they have been alive.
My son just says its all the eggs and spinach and working out all the time that does it.
When my son turned 6 he asked me if santa clause was real so i sat down and explained to him the story behind St Nicholas and how its a tradition carried on , he said "oh so you and mommy are "santa" " i said yea pretty much and he was all oh ok , well is it ok if i still refer to him as Santa?

One day im certain he will ask me if i take them and ill treat that question the same way

 

[pimpman]

As a father of four sons, I will give my opinion and advice.

First, I believe it is important to never lie to your children. I am sure some will disagree with me on that. None of my sons were ever led to believe that Santa Claus was real. I have always told them how much money I made and always showed them the bills that had to be paid. I believe it is our job to raise up productive and honest adults. I have also tried to take any fear out of them telling me the truth. Its ok that you put the ball through the window, but now we are going to work on how you will fix it.

To the subject at hand. I also believe that we should tell them the truth in the context of their understanding. So if they are let's say 10, and they ask why you look like you do, I think a legitimate answer is that "I go to the gym more than most, and I pay attention to my diet and nutrition/supplements in a more advanced way than most."

As they get older, they must also learn that it is prudent to not discuss many things with those outside the small circle of family. It is not that we hide it, we simply don't discuss certain things when there is no good that come from it. As you grow in your trust of their judgment, you can grow in your disclosure to them.

My oldest and I share everything in the knowledge and use of supplements -- I will leave it at that (he is now 24, its been this way for a about 2 years now). He listens to my advice, and I believe that this is because he knows that I have never lied to him. As we approached the point of total enlightenment, I made it clear that there was to be no discussion whatsoever with anyone and certainly no help for any of his friends in procuring cutting edge supplements.

If they are younger, and the questions are more pointed, I still think that you could say something like "I am just more willing to seek out alternatives that others are not." Or, something along those lines.

If you handle this and the rest of life with honesty, I assure you that you will greatly enjoy your relationship with them as they mature.

very well said i dont hide anything from my love ones they all know and repect my choice and love me unconditionally..unless it turns u into a jerk with an attitude i dont see a problem with it.i think it be worse if god forbid u had a seriouse health problem cuz of ur use and land u in the er or hospital and they find out that way.then not only are u a user but also a liar.

 

[jt4330]

As a father of four sons, I will give my opinion and advice.

First, I believe it is important to never lie to your children. I am sure some will disagree with me on that. None of my sons were ever led to believe that Santa Claus was real. I have always told them how much money I made and always showed them the bills that had to be paid. I believe it is our job to raise up productive and honest adults. I have also tried to take any fear out of them telling me the truth. Its ok that you put the ball through the window, but now we are going to work on how you will fix it.

To the subject at hand. I also believe that we should tell them the truth in the context of their understanding. So if they are let's say 10, and they ask why you look like you do, I think a legitimate answer is that "I go to the gym more than most, and I pay attention to my diet and nutrition/supplements in a more advanced way than most."

As they get older, they must also learn that it is prudent to not discuss many things with those outside the small circle of family. It is not that we hide it, we simply don't discuss certain things when there is no good that come from it. As you grow in your trust of their judgment, you can grow in your disclosure to them.

My oldest and I share everything in the knowledge and use of supplements -- I will leave it at that (he is now 24, its been this way for a about 2 years now). He listens to my advice, and I believe that this is because he knows that I have never lied to him. As we approached the point of total enlightenment, I made it clear that there was to be no discussion whatsoever with anyone and certainly no help for any of his friends in procuring cutting edge supplements.

If they are younger, and the questions are more pointed, I still think that you could say something like "I am just more willing to seek out alternatives that others are not." Or, something along those lines.

If you handle this and the rest of life with honesty, I assure you that you will greatly enjoy your relationship with them as they mature.

thanks for the advice!!:ort-smi

 

[johnjuanb1]

As a father of four sons, I will give my opinion and advice.

First, I believe it is important to never lie to your children. I am sure some will disagree with me on that. None of my sons were ever led to believe that Santa Claus was real. I have always told them how much money I made and always showed them the bills that had to be paid. I believe it is our job to raise up productive and honest adults. I have also tried to take any fear out of them telling me the truth. Its ok that you put the ball through the window, but now we are going to work on how you will fix it.

To the subject at hand. I also believe that we should tell them the truth in the context of their understanding. So if they are let's say 10, and they ask why you look like you do, I think a legitimate answer is that "I go to the gym more than most, and I pay attention to my diet and nutrition/supplements in a more advanced way than most."

As they get older, they must also learn that it is prudent to not discuss many things with those outside the small circle of family. It is not that we hide it, we simply don't discuss certain things when there is no good that come from it. As you grow in your trust of their judgment, you can grow in your disclosure to them.

My oldest and I share everything in the knowledge and use of supplements -- I will leave it at that (he is now 24, its been this way for a about 2 years now). He listens to my advice, and I believe that this is because he knows that I have never lied to him. As we approached the point of total enlightenment, I made it clear that there was to be no discussion whatsoever with anyone and certainly no help for any of his friends in procuring cutting edge supplements.

If they are younger, and the questions are more pointed, I still think that you could say something like "I am just more willing to seek out alternatives that others are not." Or, something along those lines.

If you handle this and the rest of life with honesty, I assure you that you will greatly enjoy your relationship with them as they mature.

Well it's about time somebody with the right idea spoke up. Too many people hide behind lies. I applaud you as a father and honest man. I was raised in this fashion. I have never once in my life lied to my parents because they treasured me to be open and honest with them. I never was punished for telling the truth. Congratulations on defying what most people in this world believe. Your children will be the better for this.

 

[Queefer]

My 11 year old asked me the other day if he was allowed to say the S word. He knows what dad does, but his biggest concerns are that my muscles will turn to fat if I stop working out. He also said he didn't want my arms to explode like Greg Valentinos did. Kids are smart, and he's like Gun's daughter in that he know's dad outworks everyone else in the gym and a whole lot more goes into it then just drugs.

 

[BillHilton]

To all who complimented my answer -- thank you.
I was only fortunate enough to have an example of the opposite approach from my own father and just vowed that I would treat my sons (and a daughter if I had one) as individual human beings.

 

[sunstateheavyweight]

To all who complimented my answer -- thank you.
I was only fortunate enough to have an example of the opposite approach from my own father and just vowed that I would treat my sons (and a daughter if I had one) as individual human beings.

I was brought up the same way and also vowed to not bring my son up that way...whether it was the whole Santa issue, sex, finances or problems within the family it was always hush hush and was always left in the dark and wondering why what was happening was happening...because of my honesty my son comes to me with questions and problems that blows my wifes mind...its because I didnt hide issues from him therefore he doesnt have issues talking to me...

 

[concreter]

I'm on trt replacement from my dr... Maybe they should talk to there dr...

 

[Lloyd1019]

My son knows and partiscipates

We went through this last year. Advice from the forums helped. I got him on the forums after I found out he was on

 

[JonnyO]

I like the idea of being smart and honest about it in a rounda bout way. Kids are smart they will figure things out on their own and if we lie it will come back on us one day down the road. Having that open, truthful line of communication with our kids is awesome, something I never had as a child but am working on with my boys to be the opposite as I had it. I dont want them to ever be afraid to tell me the truth in any situation. So I am not afraid to tell them the truth.