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You might be a bodybuilder if.....

BigChef

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Guys: If you look forward to teaching your daughter how to shave her legs just like daddy- you might be a bodybuilder.

If you can quote the protein content of a can of tuna fish to the second decimal point- you might be a bodybuilder.


If you ever used the words “sore” and “felt good” in the same sentence- you might be a bodybuilder


If you can identify Arnold Schwarzenegger from a picture showing only his calves- you might be a bodybuilder.

If you were ever late for work because the time flew by while you were posing in front of the mirror- you might be a bodybuilder.

If you ever took your clothes off in the restroom at work to check on your conditioning- you might be a bodybuilder.


If you can have a conversation lasting ten minutes or longer about essential amino acids- you might be a bodybuilder.

If you ever thought about flexing while standing in a police line up- you might be a bodybuilder.

If you diet down for your honey moon- you might be a bodybuilder

If you hear the name Jay Cutler and think Mr. Olympia- you might be a bodybuilder (Sorry all, the rest of America would say you were talking about a football player- I think.)

If you ever moved something really heavy, put it down and then picked it up again with your other arm to make sure your symmetry doesn’t suffer- you might be a bodybuilder

If you have conversations about how many grams of protein you’ve had for the day- you might be a bodybuilder.

If you ever brought your own food in Tupperware to a family dinner/wedding/restaurant- you might be a bodybuilder.

If you think that Tupperware is the greatest human invention after Hammer Strength Machines- you might be a bodybuilder.

If you know the exact circumference of your right bicep- you might be a bodybuilder.


If you think carrying 15% bodyfat qualifies you as a fat bastard- you might be a bodybuilder.


If you shave and drop your carbs slightly before going to the doctor’s office because you know you’ll have to take your shirt off- you might be a bodybuilder.

Ladies: If you complain to your girlfriends that you are holding water and it is blurring the definition in your abs, and they come after you with pitchforks and lighted torches- you might be a bodybuilder.


If you ever took chicken breasts to the movie theater so you wouldn’t miss a meal- you might be a bodybuilder.


If you ever got strange stares after asking for sodium free popcorn at the local movie theater- you might be a bodybuilder.

If a Foreman grill is a must for your carry on luggage- you might be a bodybuilder.


If you buy clothes at a particular department store because the lighting in the changing room makes you look ripped- you might be a bodybuilder.


If you ever worried that you were burning too many calories while standing in line- you might be a bodybuilder.


If you ever passed gas and birds started their migration early- you might be a bodybuilder.


If you don’t see anything wrong with using Ziploc bags as food containers- you might be a bodybuilder.

If your kid hits a front double biceps shot when someone points a camera and says “Pose!”- you might be a bodybuilder (Guilty on that one too.)

If ‘whey’ is not something that you only hear in nursery rhymes involving a little girl named Muppet- you might be a bodybuilder.


If anyone ever asked you if you had a degree in biochemistry after you explained to them what they should eat after a workout- you might be a bodybuilder.

If you ever felt left out at the annual office party because they didn’t have any sodium free skinless chicken breasts on the menu- you might be a bodybuilder.

If your idea of a dream vacation involves access to an on demand barbecue grill- you might be a bodybuilder.

When your chest is bigger than your girlfriends – you might be a bodybuilder.

When you refuse a slice of your own birthday cake – you might be a bodybuilder.

When you take more pills than your grandmother- you might be a bodybuilder.

When you schedule your college classes around your workout – you might be a bodybuilder.

When you leave a party to eat meal 6- you might be a bodybuilder.

When you pump up because you know you will have to take your shirt off at the doctor’s office- you might be a bodybuilder.

When you switch hands while brushing your teeth, just so your left arm gets the same workout as your right arm for purposes of maintaining symmetry – you might be a bodybuilder.

When you spend more time in a fitting room looking at yourself without clothes than you do while wearing the clothes that you went in to try on in the first place – you might be a bodybuilder.

You don’t want to marry a petite woman because your afraid of her “bad” genetics- you might be a bodybuilder.

:D
 

tkav1980

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3,669
Everytime you take a crap as you sit on the toilet you check squat depth and form.

every time you pass a slightly reflective surface you do a 1/4 turn pose.

you read food labels and automatically adjust the math up to "your" portion size.
 

hikitiki

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Jun 6, 2010
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beautiful!!!

I'm guilty of many of these... particularly the pumps before any situation that might involve clothes coming off
 

TheOtherOne55

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hahahah this list is hilarious

i thought i was the only one who randomly takes off his shirt in the bathroom at work to see how conditioned i look or how my abs are that day
 

Grit

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Apr 24, 2009
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Flex in a police line up. LOL that was a good read
 

btech

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Feb 27, 2008
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... If you push a shopping cart with a thumbless grip...
 

thebrick

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LOL!!! I can identify... today I had a business meeting scheduled for Friday that will be right during my normal workout hour… it pissed me off :D I usually try to do everything to keep that hour open. Today I failed :mad:
 

Flex2019

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LOL...I am guilty of MANY of these...:eek:
 

madmick

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Nov 25, 2004
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If you nervously look up and down the street for police cars every time you go the mailbox, you might be a bodybuilder.
 

quadzilla500

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Jan 28, 2010
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oh ummm are we really that bad???? Well I am anyway.... funny funny shit hear, and how true they are..
 

Emery

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Funny as hell...

And the truth shall set us free!!!:p
 

Jello

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If you wake up in the middle of the night to drink a protein shake.
 

Jello

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If you have ever gotten pissed when someone has said you look like you've lost weight.
 

BigChef

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If you nervously look up and down the street for police cars every time you go the mailbox, you might be a bodybuilder.
:yeahthat:

lmao!! So true!!
 

Jeremy24

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These are great.....so funny.

When your comfortable taking your pants off at any time to show off your shredded wheels

When u sneak away from your desk at work to eat a meal

When u freak out thinking you have aquired some gyno, just to find out your sodium was high and u were holding water
 

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