- Joined
- Apr 2, 2016
- Messages
- 160
I went through a really difficult breakup going on two years ago. I was largely at fault, I was very neglectful and really used to people giving me my way etc. and I guess I figured everyone would always put up with it. She didn't, and left out of the blue.
It was all on good terms. We never were the type to argue, the first month was brutal for me, as expected. We would try to remain in contact and finally we just took a good time period apart, which I feel was a good thing. She recently started contacting me through text out of nowhere, not really having anything to say.... just sending me a random comment, a song she likes. The texts are playful and flirtatious, sometimes she'll just send me a wink or tell me she misses me. But she also will try to ask if I'm with someone etc. It's very random and goes nowhere so I'm not trying to pay much attention to it, if I ask her to meet up she backs off. I get the feeling she's sort of testing the waters, she had a lot of walls built up when we broke up and it seems like they are slowly starting to crumble a bit (one of the things she told me when she left is she was very afraid if she gave me another chance I wouldn't change).
That aside. It's been two years and I'm over the breakup, I think i needed that reality check to be honest, but it just hasn't stopped hurting. I took six months off to just work on and gather myself. I then started dating. I've dated some amazing, beautiful, caring women ..... women that have great qualities and I would normally be very happy to be in a relationship with. But it's like, they aren't her.... even if they have better qualities, are more attractive etc., they just aren't her.
It's just frustrating. I've never had something like this, I'll normally grieve for a month or so and then move on. It's been two years and it just feels like there's no end to it.
Has anyone gone through something that dragged on this long, will I just always love her? I just feel a lot of guilt getting into a relationship with anyone (which I do want, I'm not into casual dating, I like the stability of being with one person) while she is still always in the back of my mind. I feel like I'm doing something wrong.
Any advice is appreciated.
It was all on good terms. We never were the type to argue, the first month was brutal for me, as expected. We would try to remain in contact and finally we just took a good time period apart, which I feel was a good thing. She recently started contacting me through text out of nowhere, not really having anything to say.... just sending me a random comment, a song she likes. The texts are playful and flirtatious, sometimes she'll just send me a wink or tell me she misses me. But she also will try to ask if I'm with someone etc. It's very random and goes nowhere so I'm not trying to pay much attention to it, if I ask her to meet up she backs off. I get the feeling she's sort of testing the waters, she had a lot of walls built up when we broke up and it seems like they are slowly starting to crumble a bit (one of the things she told me when she left is she was very afraid if she gave me another chance I wouldn't change).
That aside. It's been two years and I'm over the breakup, I think i needed that reality check to be honest, but it just hasn't stopped hurting. I took six months off to just work on and gather myself. I then started dating. I've dated some amazing, beautiful, caring women ..... women that have great qualities and I would normally be very happy to be in a relationship with. But it's like, they aren't her.... even if they have better qualities, are more attractive etc., they just aren't her.
It's just frustrating. I've never had something like this, I'll normally grieve for a month or so and then move on. It's been two years and it just feels like there's no end to it.
Has anyone gone through something that dragged on this long, will I just always love her? I just feel a lot of guilt getting into a relationship with anyone (which I do want, I'm not into casual dating, I like the stability of being with one person) while she is still always in the back of my mind. I feel like I'm doing something wrong.
Any advice is appreciated.