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PLEASE READ: When Giving Advice Regarding Addiction...

OuchThatHurts

Moderator / Psy, Ret.
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Please Note: This an addendum of that which is already posted in the Forum Rules.

Hello members of Professional Muscle! I myself (OTH), The Staff, Moderators, and members of Professional Muscle want to thank you for paying a visit to the Counselling Forum (spelled 'Counseling' in the USA because we're wankers). We would like to take a moment to discuss the topic of addiction as it pertains to the Counselling Forum.

This is not an attempt to censor you or to take away your free speech. This concerns all of us so please hear me out.

When replying to a post made by someone regarding addiction we must always be aware that the OP (Original Poster) may be an individual who could:

Require treatment by a licensed professional or similarly qualified individual
Already be in treatment
Be in a rehabilitative program
Be working to stay in recovering status
Be any or all of the above

We certainly don't want to risk damaging anyone's progress!

Many great threads in this forum contain experiences and encouragement for everyone's benefit. I truly believe this a great thing. And by all means, I invite you all to offer supportive comments and best wishes for a fellow member's continued success. Say it in whatever manner you like (e.g. "keep up the good work", "stay strong", etc.). Feel free to offer your own experiences of living with addiction or even someone else's addiction. I want you to feel good about it. I'm certain that I speak for everyone here at Professional Muscle when I give you a sincere, "Thank you."

However... (and don't worry, this is painless)

If you find a member is experiencing a crisis or a danger of relapse (or any danger) you are not being a friend by doing anything other than encouraging them to seek out the help of a licensed and/or qualified person or professional. How would you feel if you discover after having broken this rule, one of your fellow members was hurt or worse because they were doing something they read here rather than seeking out proper help? That's not a place you want to be.

I'll give you an example. You may offer to someone that they should pray. In fact, many programs have been shown to be successful by using some form of spirituality as the basis for success in achieving sobriety. But nevertheless, if you are a spiritual individual, I expect you have come to the conclusion that grace builds on nature.

Suppose you were to find yourself amidst a furious and deadly hurricane. Would you just stand there and pray? No. You would rush for safety and do everything physically possible to survive. Sure, you might pray along the way but you still seek shelter. At least I hope you do! On a personal note, within the circumstances of my own life, I won't lie and say I don't believe prayer hasn't been helpful to me. It has. But it is not a 'one stop shop'. I had to work hard, too. Just as that individual in the hurricane of addiction.

It important to keep this board healthy in every area - our minds, our bodies, and definitely our muscle. When offering help, remember to ask yourself if you truly know:

The individual
If the person has been, is, or intends to be in treatment
What medications they are taking
If they've had bloodwork
Their history with addiction
If they have allergies
All of their information

These are all necessary and required prior to offering any advice of a medical nature (therapy, medications, programs, etc.).

For these reasons we must follow this basic rule for the greater welfare of ourselves, our friends, and the entire Professional Muscle Community. Now go sling that steel.

Sincerely,

OTH (OuchThatHurts)
 
I "get it", and agree with you OTH. I put this in my pm to you, but i'll share w/ those here that i entered AA after seeking therapy from a PHD Addiction Specialist, it was her advice for me to go into a 12 step program, IN CONJUNCTION with therapy of a licensed Professional. So, my experience, which was life saving, follows what OTH is recommending here, the first step i took was seeking the counsel of a qualified professional.

I seem to forget this, but that won't happen anymore, OTH is right.
 
I "get it", and agree with you OTH. I put this in my pm to you, but i'll share w/ those here that i entered AA after seeking therapy from a PHD Addiction Specialist, it was her advice for me to go into a 12 step program, IN CONJUNCTION with therapy of a licensed Professional. So, my experience, which was life saving, follows what OTH is recommending here, the first step i took was seeking the counsel of a qualified professional.

I seem to forget this, but that won't happen anymore, OTH is right.
I still maintain that AA's success rates speak for themselves but based on APA is greatly increased along with ongoing treatment with a healthcare professional. It's mind, body, and spirit. Any weak area will be dangerous. Thank you, Gator, for the understanding.

I'm just asking for a little temperance and understanding on this issue.
 
This is a just a slightly modified post to what I placed in the "Rules" thread.

Please listen. We all work here. We all need to work together. It's sad and it does seem harsh at times but we all have to understand that someone with a disease (such as addiction) needs to be treated by a professional and not get a thread with 15 different "experiences" or "advisements" on how to get well. This has to be done as a careful process. We all must work together to SUPPORT these individuals, offer supportive comments and best wishes, continued success, keep up the good work, etc. I've been highly patient at letting many of these things slide because I fully understand that it feels very rewarding to offer one's own experiences of overcoming or living with a particular disease to someone else in the hope that it will help them as well. That's a good thing and I don't want you to feel bad about it.

However, when someone is in crisis or danger of relapse, you are not being a friend by offering them advice. How are you going to live with yourself if the next week, you discover the particular individual died of an overdose because he was praying to Jesus instead of seeking medical advice? Don't you know that grace BUILDS on nature? You can't pray your way through a hurricane. You do everything physically possible and then pray for the grace to get through. It's not a one-stop-shop.

I too, hope and, in fact, pray that you all take this to heart and try to understand what this means. We need to keep this board healthy and safe. And I don't want any member or administrator of this board getting a subpoena for offering medical advice to an individual who had injured themselves or even worse. Do you know the person. Have they ever been hospitalized? What are their allergies? Do you really know their history? Have you seen their medical chart, possible head injuries, a blood workup or toxicology? These items are all necessary prior to offering advice of a medical nature (therapy, treatment, drugs, etc.).

I hope you will all understand. This is not censorship. You have a right to your opinions and to express them. In order to keep this board healthy you have to ask yourselves if what you are saying, in any kind of circumstance, could be very dangerous to someone. You don't want that.

Take care of yourselves and when taking care of each other, know when to say when. Keep yourselves safe (and this board) by using common sense.

Peace,

OTH

Being a man who prays to God, I think that is one of the best statements I heard here. :)
 
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Amen

Ouch always has very good advice and that was well put.
 
OTH is a cool dude! He knows his stuff. Big bump for OTH!
 
This is a just a slightly modified post to what I placed in the "Rules" thread.

Please listen. We all work here. We all need to work together. It's sad and it does seem harsh at times but we all have to understand that someone with a disease (such as addiction) needs to be treated by a professional and not get a thread with 15 different "experiences" or "advisements" on how to get well. This has to be done as a careful process. We all must work together to SUPPORT these individuals, offer supportive comments and best wishes, continued success, keep up the good work, etc. I've been highly patient at letting many of these things slide because I fully understand that it feels very rewarding to offer one's own experiences of overcoming or living with a particular disease to someone else in the hope that it will help them as well. That's a good thing and I don't want you to feel bad about it.

However, when someone is in crisis or danger of relapse, you are not being a friend by offering them advice. How are you going to live with yourself if the next week, you discover the particular individual died of an overdose because he was praying to Jesus instead of seeking medical advice? Don't you know that grace BUILDS on nature? You can't pray your way through a hurricane. You do everything physically possible and then pray for the grace to get through. It's not a one-stop-shop.

I too, hope and, in fact, pray that you all take this to heart and try to understand what this means. We need to keep this board healthy and safe. And I don't want any member or administrator of this board getting a subpoena for offering medical advice to an individual who had injured themselves or even worse. Do you know the person. Have they ever been hospitalized? What are their allergies? Do you really know their history? Have you seen their medical chart, possible head injuries, a blood workup or toxicology? These items are all necessary prior to offering advice of a medical nature (therapy, treatment, drugs, etc.).

I hope you will all understand. This is not censorship. You have a right to your opinions and to express them. In order to keep this board healthy you have to ask yourselves if what you are saying, in any kind of circumstance, could be very dangerous to someone. You don't want that.

Take care of yourselves and when taking care of each other, know when to say when. Keep yourselves safe (and this board) by using common sense.

Peace,

OTH

Well put together OTH.
i really hope the message gets to everybody
 
"You can't pray your way through a hurricane. You do everything physically possible and then pray for the grace to get through. It's not a one-stop-shop."




Well SAID!
 
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Very good stuff here! Nobody will ever truly understand an addict, or what they go through, unless they themselves become an addict. And I wouldn't wish that on anyone. I've been there and it truly brings out the very worst part of anybody. But with that being said, wth proper help it can bring out the best in everybody!
 
Last edited:
It's an old thread, but it's a timeless reminder. Thanks for this. It's sometimes hard to remember being kind and understanding sometimes, especially when you're in the middle of a difficult situation eve with someone you love that's having a hard time fighting addiction. I hope we never give up on them...
 
2,499 days since I took the needle out of my arm.

As odd as this may sound to some, being an addict is/was truly a blessing. I got to experience so much. I can't begin to tell my story as its a lengthy one. Our stories are all similar as the end results are mostly the same. My wife is also a recovering addict and I have to remind myself of that almost daily.

I'm not proud of the things I did as an active addict but grateful for the experiences. I dont regret anything I've done. I've been able to right my wrongs. I've made peace with them, accepted them and have moved on. Working with other addicts certainly is a difficult task and everyone retains it in a different way on a different time frame. If they even retain it at all. I'd give up my 2,499 days of being meth free for every active addict to experience the clean life. Unfortunately I can't do that so I do what I can to help others achieve such success. I pray daily for those who still suffer and for those on the right path. It gets easier the more you practice. Life becomes more manageable. To those of you who have been down similar paths, and those living the clean life, I commend you. I love you and pray you stay on the right path. Don't give up, don't give in. Keep your focus, stay positive, and most importantly stay close to God.
 

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