first this takes alot to post this

[jrmuscle]

i am in need of help. you could sya i have a problem lying but not on purpose!
i am not the smartest guy so i will do something one day or say something another day and i cant remember the following day what exactly that i said so ... when i tell someone like my girl she gets pissed cause its like dealing with a child!! i want to change but i cant afford therapy and i want to stop lying any one with helpful hints please let me know them.. like i said tho most of the time lies just pop out before i think!

 

[hawkmoon]

i am in need of help. you could sya i have a problem lying but not on purpose!
i am not the smartest guy so i will do something one day or say something another day and i cant remember the following day what exactly that i said so ... when i tell someone like my girl she gets pissed cause its like dealing with a child!! i want to change but i cant afford therapy and i want to stop lying any one with helpful hints please let me know them.. like i said tho most of the time lies just pop out before i think!

Don't discount your ability to afford therapy. A social worker has many of the basic skills to help you and they usually operate on a sliding scale making them much more affordable.

 

[ohmygoodness]

i am in need of help. you could sya i have a problem lying but not on purpose!
i am not the smartest guy so i will do something one day or say something another day and i cant remember the following day what exactly that i said so ... when i tell someone like my girl she gets pissed cause its like dealing with a child!! i want to change but i cant afford therapy and i want to stop lying any one with helpful hints please let me know them.. like i said tho most of the time lies just pop out before i think!

I'm sure if you put the effort into it you'll find a low fee community health service.

What's your pay off for lying? You need to figure out what you think and feeling before you lie?

 

[Mr. Bear]

being that I'm a counselor in training, I know that there are a lot of places out there that offer free or discounted thearpy sessions. Look into it and try to find these in your commmunity. PM me if I can help in anyway

 

[smootheavy]

I agree with the above, there are options with sliding fee scales.

I have had my rounds with therapy, I can say the single most effective technique for me is identification. You must take an active approach to identifying your reactivity (yes pathalogical lying is reactive, ie it does not really involve analytical thinking). To do this, one must pay attention at all times, through paying attention you use your analytical mind and can identify when you are being reactive or are actually thinking.

this enables you to "catch" yourself, and restructure. Over time you will 1/2 life the time between being reactive and proactive. Eventually through persistence and analytics you will no longer lie reactively.

 

[EVERLAST]

time to think...

OK...you must strive to be honest in all things.
Its good practice.

So try this trick...
Taking a moment between the time you hear something and you then speak will do two things:

one...give you a minute to think and not reactively lie,

and two...give you the appearance of having importance to what you say.


studies show that pauses allow the listener to focus on what you are about to say. It makes you look more important to pause as you speak and moving slightly more slowly does the same.

So take a minute to think before you speak...
two birds with one stone kinda thing.

E

 

[FeverishFlux]

Get a tiny recorder or a small notebook. Start keeping notes of the things you say or are supposed/want to do. Review them every morning and throughout your day. Some ppl are just too busy to keep themselves in the positive in their lives. Try keeping a short tab on yourself, only takes a second to talk into your mp3 recorder or jot down a note on a small binder.:st;r-wars

 

[jrmuscle]

well a lil background so you know

first and foremost awesome advice i never really thought thinking was the cause but huh ironicly reading this made me think lol. but seriously i just speak trying to feel like i fit in or am cool i guess but i can stop that slowly but surely and i can get supps that aid in focus which i need...
ok the background just a taster but i have had a hammer to the face been in many fights and smoked tons of pot so my attention is off i can improve it now that i know i have to focus