Can't get over Ex

[Hyperemia]

I do very much appreciate what I have, I would just like what I have to not include forever single-ness. At this point I'll never even be able to have a 50 year anniversary.....and many other things. And that's sad.

That’s just arbitrary. Who cares if you don’t hit 50 years with someone? Would you really rather be with someone who doesn’t want to be with you just because you were together a long time? Wouldn’t it be better to get 40, 30, or 20 years with someone who is as much in love with you as you are them? Breakups are tough, but you do eventually get over them. Just stay busy, idle hands are the devils playground or some shit like that.

 

[BLKGUY2006]

How the F**k do rape accusations slide into it here, that seems very odd to even mention...

I agree!!!! That’s not normal

 

[BLKGUY2006]

You are 35 And the longest relationship you’ve had is 2 1/2 months??? I could not fathom saying I love you in that short period of time. Have you ever thought you were potentially too clingy???

 

[Hyperemia]

You are 35 And the longest relationship you’ve had is 2 1/2 months??? I could not fathom saying I love you in that short period of time. Have you ever thought you were potentially too clingy???

He said he was with her 2 1/2 years.

I think I did say I love you to my wife in just a few months. I’m saying I think, but I damn well know I did. We’ve now been together for 13 years. Renewed our vows on our 10 year wedding anniversary last year. Sometimes you just know. I’m more in love with her now than I was in those first short few months. For reference, she’s the only woman I’ve ever said I love to that quickly. I don’t regret that decision one bit.

That said, she’s gotta love you back for it to work. I had my share of break ups prior to meeting my wife. It can be tough to move on after a 2 year relationship, but you gotta try because otherwise you won’t meet the one that’s going to love you back.

What the fuck am I even going on about? Ruhl, brother I know this shit hurts but you have to just let her go. From what you’ve wrote, she’s made it abundantly clear she’s no longer interested in being in a relationship with you. You need to respect that. Your feelings of wanting to be with her, don’t trump her feelings of not wanting to be with you. Don’t be that guy.

 

[Brock456]

I've always wanted to be married...or at least have a life partner. I have almost no ACTUAL desire to have sex outside of a relationship. I can talk all day like a giant whore but doing it? Not so much.

You’re missing out bro. I think every man needs to experience whoredom at some point in his life.

You need experience before you settle down. You want 1 vagina for the next 50 years?

 

[BLKGUY2006]

He said he was with her 2 1/2 years.

I think I did say I love you to my wife in just a few months. I’m saying I think, but I damn well know I did. We’ve now been together for 13 years. Renewed our vows on our 10 year wedding anniversary last year. Sometimes you just know. I’m more in love with her now than I was in those first short few months. For reference, she’s the only woman I’ve ever said I love to that quickly. I don’t regret that decision one bit.

That said, she’s gotta love you back for it to work. I had my share of break ups prior to meeting my wife. It can be tough to move on after a 2 year relationship, but you gotta try because otherwise you won’t meet the one that’s going to love you back.

What the fuck am I even going on about? Ruhl, brother I know this shit hurts but you have to just let her go. From what you’ve wrote, she’s made it abundantly clear she’s no longer interested in being in a relationship with you. You need to respect that. Your feelings of wanting to be with her, don’t trump her feelings of not wanting to be with you. Don’t be that guy.

My bad. Thanks for pointing that out.

 

[Ruhlfreak55]

He said he was with her 2 1/2 years.

I think I did say I love you to my wife in just a few months. I’m saying I think, but I damn well know I did. We’ve now been together for 13 years. Renewed our vows on our 10 year wedding anniversary last year. Sometimes you just know. I’m more in love with her now than I was in those first short few months. For reference, she’s the only woman I’ve ever said I love to that quickly. I don’t regret that decision one bit.

That said, she’s gotta love you back for it to work. I had my share of break ups prior to meeting my wife. It can be tough to move on after a 2 year relationship, but you gotta try because otherwise you won’t meet the one that’s going to love you back.

What the fuck am I even going on about? Ruhl, brother I know this shit hurts but you have to just let her go. From what you’ve wrote, she’s made it abundantly clear she’s no longer interested in being in a relationship with you. You need to respect that. Your feelings of wanting to be with her, don’t trump her feelings of not wanting to be with you. Don’t be that guy.

It just doesn't make any sense. And my brain says it has to make sense somehow. And that's a neverending wheel of trying to figure things out that I can't without more information. I hear you. I should let it and her go, completely. I guess it doesn't help much that I feel like while being myself, there's nothing I can do to make myself attractive to the average female....and finding ones that I'm compatible enough to be with just feels impossible. ESPECIALLY, given that this too ended terribly and (to me) abruptly.

 

[Ruhlfreak55]

You want 1 vagina for the next 50 years?

I want one set of holes for the rest of my life pretty much.

 

[Keefs]

So she broke up with me at the end of April....and I can't even pretend to "move on". I keep myself busy obviously with any number of things at this point (work, new house, selling old house, training, etc.)...but thoughts of her creep in in the points between, which are numerous. I'm at a point where I legitimately don't know what to do. She won't communicate with me (has me blocked on stuff, ignores texts) at this point, and I never really got any REAL closure. I don't honestly know if she convinced herself I raped her at once point (I didn't, if anyone ever says NO, STOP, at all I halt all activity and check in or just stop) or what. She acted like we weren't compatible in a lot of ways, and maybe that's true, but I also love her dearly and I don't throw the L word around.

To me honestly saying you Love someone is extremely serious, I pretty much swear fealty to that person on some level if I'm saying that.

I could just go to her house obviously, but I feel like that's being disrespectful....the on the other hand maybe her warped senses of love and caring WANT (or wanted at some point) me to do that? I just don't get it.

I've never had a relationship that lasted more than a few months (and maybe 2 of those), so having been with her for ~2.5 years it just feels like a whole chunk of you is missing and I don't really know how to get over it...or if I even should. A lot of me thinks that was my one chance at this point, to not be alone for the duration, and I NEVER wanted to be alone forever. Just me and her (and kids or whatever) against the world? Hell yea, but alone? Never thought I would be here.

I feel like it should have been made abundantly apparent my whole life that if you don't find someone in hs or college that you aren't finding anyone.

And while I'd like to think I could really whore it up, it just isn't even fun for me and I'm fairly certain I would just be thinking of her. Plus the fact that I will not drink or be around it limits the opportunity for that anyway.

I'm just kind of venting at this point, I don't really expect anyone to solve my problems for me.

Try looking like this! It’ll make you feel better! I promise

 

[Hyperemia]

It just doesn't make any sense. And my brain says it has to make sense somehow. And that's a neverending wheel of trying to figure things out that I can't without more information. I hear you. I should let it and her go, completely. I guess it doesn't help much that I feel like while being myself, there's nothing I can do to make myself attractive to the average female....and finding ones that I'm compatible enough to be with just feels impossible. ESPECIALLY, given that this too ended terribly and (to me) abruptly.

Of course it's tough to let go, but I think you know it's the only thing you can and have to do. Things feel tough now but trust me brother, it'll hurt less and less the more time goes by. One day you'll realize you've gotten over her, not forgotten, but you won't have that pain you have now. I know it seems like it wont happen, but it will.

You don't want to NOT be yourself just to attract a partner. That's setting you up for failure down the road, your true self will always shine through... eventually. Have you tried looking into those dating apps. I don't mean the hook up ones but the ones where people are looking for a real relationship. A good friend of mine, that is around our age, just got married. They found each other through one of those sites. I couldn't imagine doing that 10 years ago, but times are changing. It also removes the bar scene. The bar or clubs was always my go to in my early 20s. The bar can be fun but in your 30s I think it's not the best environment for what you're looking for. Give it a go brother, you have nothing to lose.

In the mean time, stay busy. Use this time to better yourself. Find happiness in things you enjoy doing and not in a partner. The partner will come with time, just stay positive. Positive / happy people attract other positive / happy people. If you're out there moping and being negative, you wont attract the person you're looking for. You got this brother, spend your current time being the best version of yourself.

 

[Brock456]

I want one set of holes for the rest of my life pretty much.

That sounds horrible.

And by the sound of it, sounds like you only had limited amount of holes in your 30+ years.

Live a little bro.

 

[Performance Based]

My now wife and I split ways in 2017ish - Thought I had everything before I met her, epic career - beautiful home - purpose. We split ways as I was not mature enough yet for a serious relationship. She started dating someone else and I mentally and emotionally could not deal with it. Lack of closure, longing, the realization that I lost something priceless.

Wound up moving from Dallas to Austin for a year after seeing her at one of our favorite restaurants - it absolutely crushed me.

She reached out after about ten months and we were married two years later.


I don't know you nor your economic condition but if you have the ability to relocate and immerse yourself in a completely new environment; all I can say is it helped me massively.

 

[Brock456]

My now wife and I split ways in 2017ish - Thought I had everything before I met her, epic career - beautiful home - purpose. We split ways as I was not mature enough yet for a serious relationship. She started dating someone else and I mentally and emotionally could not deal with it. Lack of closure, longing, the realization that I lost something priceless.

Wound up moving from Dallas to Austin for a year after seeing her at one of our favorite restaurants - it absolutely crushed me.

She reached out after about ten months and we were married two years later.


I don't know you nor your economic condition but if you have the ability to relocate and immerse yourself in a completely new environment; all I can say is it helped me massively.

Interesting story and congrats. Gives the OP some hope, although I think he’s better off After that mention of rape.

What made her reach out?

Sometimes women need that time to realize what they had or the grass isn’t always greener on the other side.

 

[goback2013]

No kids together ? This should be an easy case of banging away your feelings/memories.

 

[goback2013]

Try looking like this! It’ll make you feel better! I promise

Facts after mother freak facts!!

In the meantime up the tren!!

 

[Keefs]

Facts after mother freak facts!!

In the meantime up the tren!!

I’ve only dabbled with a little tren. Right now just running 300 test 300 deca and some Hgh. I thought about dropping the deca at the end and switching to Tren though.

 

[goback2013]

I’ve only dabbled with a little tren. Right now just running 300 test 300 deca and some Hgh. I thought about dropping the deca at the end and switching to Tren though.

the 'up the tren' was actually directed to Op...

 

[Ruhlfreak55]

Well Tren will certainly kill the feelings, I KNOW that. I also had been intentionally avoiding it out of respect for her.

 

[hevi-head]

Facts after mother freak facts!!

In the meantime up the tren!!

For mental stability maybe not lol. Can really fuck with some people’s head’s especially if they’re already dealing with something

 

[hevi-head]

Well Tren will certainly kill the feelings, I KNOW that. I also had been intentionally avoiding it out of respect for her.

Have you ever used trest? I can’t say enough good things of how it makes me feel. And that’s only 7.5- 10 mg ED.
WAYYYY less anxious and just overall almost euphoric feeling.