20 year old son just started training

[BLKGUY2006]

brother, i am in exact same boat and def have some experience in this realm! anytime you need to vent or rant feel free to hmu, you have a friend in me! its going to work out my dude hang tough

Thanks man, I do appreciate the support and may take you up on that offer.

 

[solarsentinel1]

BLKGUY2006...while I was lucky enough to maintain shared custody and unlimited visitation after my divorce and remained very close to my sons, I did go through times of great loneliness for them, as their mom was their primary residence. I can only imagine what you must feel compared to what I experienced, and my prayers are with you and with your boy. While time hurts, he will seek you out one day. From reading your posts, I can tell that no matter how long that takes or what he needs you for at that moment of awakening within him, you will be every bit and beyond the hero that he desires.

In the spirit of community, if you are still in NC, I am just north of you, in Virginia. I believe you are LE, and I used to be a long time ago, so we have some things in common. As Muay Thai said "you have a friend in me" as well. If you ever need to talk, vent, or even want to grab a workout or come up and have a bonfire and range shoot on my farm, the new wife and I have place to put you up. PM me anytime brother.

SCMTNBOY......keep this thread going. Seeing you and your son bond over training is not only heartwarming it is motivating. Seeing some of the craziness unfolding in this world as of late, it is inspiring to watch you both work together towards common objectives and shared beliefs as a family. Truly a beautiful thing! Thank you for sharing.

 

[Big Vin]

I started training with 17 year old about 6 months ago. So nice to pass on the old school knowledge and see him enjoy it (i'm in my late 50's) . He's starting to teach his friends , after they've seen his progress. He's 6'3" and about 215 pounds now. Nothing like training with your own son!

 

[hawkmoon]

I've seen your posts and without reviewing this thread, I must say I think this is just wonderful.
My daughter won't be heading to the gym anytime soon, but at least I have my wife

 

[Love_to_Bodybuild]

Congratulations. One thing I've seen a quote or meme was the only man that wants you to be better than him is your dad..

I think it depends on the dad, I think it's true. Then I realize many older guys really do want to teach , help and see younger generations do well.

 

[Big Vin]

Yes...that's exactly right. I told him I'd like to see him be better than me. At first he didn't understand, but he's starting to get it. We also train at a very old school(somewhat hard core) gym. No heat, no a/c, no locker rooms...garage door type ...so he's getting full on knowledge of how I grew up and thank god he loves it.
He's also accepted amongst the guys and they'll help him as well.

 

[scmtnboy]

I started training with 17 year old about 6 months ago. So nice to pass on the old school knowledge and see him enjoy it (i'm in my late 50's) . He's starting to teach his friends , after they've seen his progress. He's 6'3" and about 215 pounds now. Nothing like training with your own son!

That’s awesome bro. It is the best. I mean I love training, I don’t think I will ever stop but I’m having the most fun time with him right now.

 

[scmtnboy]

It’s was super cute. Yesterday he text me “can you send me the video you posted of me doing leg curls?” - Then when we were training I asked him what made him think of that. He said this girl that works there with him was talking about how good his back looked so he wanted to see. You have to know my kid and his personality to fully understand. He’s super sweet and kind and pretty confident as far as school and other stuff goes but it’s cool to see him getting a whole new level of self esteem.

 

[BLKGUY2006]

BLKGUY2006...while I was lucky enough to maintain shared custody and unlimited visitation after my divorce and remained very close to my sons, I did go through times of great loneliness for them, as their mom was their primary residence. I can only imagine what you must feel compared to what I experienced, and my prayers are with you and with your boy. While time hurts, he will seek you out one day. From reading your posts, I can tell that no matter how long that takes or what he needs you for at that moment of awakening within him, you will be every bit and beyond the hero that he desires.

In the spirit of community, if you are still in NC, I am just north of you, in Virginia. I believe you are LE, and I used to be a long time ago, so we have some things in common. As Muay Thai said "you have a friend in me" as well. If you ever need to talk, vent, or even want to grab a workout or come up and have a bonfire and range shoot on my farm, the new wife and I have place to put you up. PM me anytime brother.

SCMTNBOY......keep this thread going. Seeing you and your son bond over training is not only heartwarming it is motivating. Seeing some of the craziness unfolding in this world as of late, it is inspiring to watch you both work together towards common objectives and shared beliefs as a family. Truly a beautiful thing! Thank you for sharing.

Im kinda tearing up…. actually I am. Yes I’m in NC still just outside of CLT. I’m a FF, “big red truck“ and still on the truck for last 25 years. Probably 1.5 hrs to VA state line.
I’m at a loss for words right now. I just worry so much about him. He is biracial, and now in an area with zero kids that look like him. Before he left he was hearing kids say things he didn’t understand and I was preparing him for the actual “real world“ as any good father would. He is not going to know how to respond because we all know kids can be so mean. I wanted to teach him so much more, to be kind, and know what’s right and wrong. To be a better man than I am. My father, his papa set the bar SO high in that regard.
Again I appreciate ALL the kindness shown here. Solarsentinel1, I will def keep your offer in mind. Absolutely amazing kindness and I think you, sir.

 

[Muay Thai]

Im kinda tearing up…. actually I am. Yes I’m in NC still just outside of CLT. I’m a FF, “big red truck“ and still on the truck for last 25 years. Probably 1.5 hrs to VA state line.
I’m at a loss for words right now. I just worry so much about him. He is biracial, and now in an area with zero kids that look like him. Before he left he was hearing kids say things he didn’t understand and I was preparing him for the actual “real world“ as any good father would. He is not going to know how to respond because we all know kids can be so mean. I wanted to teach him so much more, to be kind, and know what’s right and wrong. To be a better man than I am. My father, his papa set the bar SO high in that regard.
Again I appreciate ALL the kindness shown here. Solarsentinel1, I will def keep your offer in mind. Absolutely amazing kindness and I think you, sir.

you teach him to use his words first and if that doesn't work walk away, and that he has HUMAN AGENCY to defend himself physically under any physical provocation. I got picked on for having freckles and being white in a Mexican VARRIO. The first name they gave me was pecas aka FRECKLES. Then it was HOLY GHOST obviously because of my skin color. The majority of their parents called me guero translating to whiteboy. I was the source of many sterotypical jokes aimed at white culture, that I truly couldn't identify with as I grew up chicano and my family were immigrants too! Calling any one "boy" is analogous to obsolete jim crow lingo, but I faced this. When I was 5 in pop warner I encountered my first and only bullly who got away with it. He said it looked like I had shit sprayed on my skin. It crushed me. But made me evil. and I began my bully hunter quest. Dont let your son go down that path. My experience with most African Americans has NOT been great either, but at the same time my best friend and roll dog was black and egyptian! as black and egyptian he faced MAJOR RACIST issues growing up in a Mexican neighborhood as ours was very anti black (some old school surenos are still this way ). his family took me in. but this is more of a cultural thing here in san diego and los Angeles as I look like a cholo or skinhead to them and cultures DO clash here way more than you hear about in the bible belt or south. There is a race war here actively in the prison system and often carries out to streets. SD was not racist like that, for the most part we got along with black gangs, LA is hit or miss. Youre not out of the count my brother! I know its hard and ugly right now , but document everything in writing and go see a family law facilitator at local court and present them with your judge issued court paperwork, they will fucking subpoena her, I am speaking from experience!
here is us lost in a BLOOD neighborhood in Inglewood (south central los Angeles), I was wearing the wrong attire (padres) didnt go well with the locals that was a crazy night

 

[BLKGUY2006]

you teach him to use his words first and if that doesn't work walk away, and that he has HUMAN AGENCY to defend himself physically under any physical provocation. I got picked on for having freckles and being white in a Mexican VARRIO. The first name they gave me was pecas aka FRECKLES. Then it was HOLY GHOST obviously because of my skin color. The majority of their parents called me guero translating to whiteboy. I was the source of many sterotypical jokes aimed at white culture, that I truly couldn't identify with as I grew up chicano and my family were immigrants too! Calling any one "boy" is analogous to obsolete jim crow lingo, but I faced this. When I was 5 in pop warner I encountered my first and only bullly who got away with it. He said it looked like I had shit sprayed on my skin. It crushed me. But made me evil. and I began my bully hunter quest. Dont let your son go down that path. My experience with most African Americans has NOT been great either, but at the same time my best friend and roll dog was black and egyptian! as black and egyptian he faced MAJOR RACIST issues growing up in a Mexican neighborhood as ours was very anti black (some old school surenos are still this way ). his family took me in. but this is more of a cultural thing here in san diego and los Angeles as I look like a cholo or skinhead to them and cultures DO clash here way more than you hear about in the bible belt or south. There is a race war here actively in the prison system and often carries out to streets. SD was not racist like that, for the most part we got along with black gangs, LA is hit or miss. Youre not out of the count my brother! I know its hard and ugly right now , but document everything in writing and go see a family law facilitator at local court and present them with your judge issued court paperwork, they will fucking subpoena her, I am speaking from experience!
View attachment 196296here is us lost in a BLOOD neighborhood in Inglewood (south central los Angeles), I was wearing the wrong attire (padres) didnt go well with the locals that was a crazy night

Yes, it can be extremely hurtful for youngsters. Where I live there were more biracial of various races than one race. So it wasn’t much of a deal. I never dwelled on his race, just told him he got to be the best of both and that’s what made him extra cool. He actually loved it when I told him that. Now he’s in a different location and I don’t even know if he will be able to find a barbershop. Again, she was subpoenaed six times in 2023 appeared five and the judge did nothing. I’m $20,000 out and can’t do it anymore. Thank you for your story, I know one day he will reach back out.

 

[Muay Thai]

Yes, it can be extremely hurtful for youngsters. Where I live there were more biracial of various races than one race. So it wasn’t much of a deal. I never dwelled on his race, just told him he got to be the best of both and that’s what made him extra cool. He actually loved it when I told him that. Now he’s in a different location and I don’t even know if he will be able to find a barbershop. Again, she was subpoenaed six times in 2023 appeared five and the judge did nothing. I’m $20,000 out and can’t do it anymore. Thank you for your story, I know one day he will reach back out.

haha this is a lesser problem to have and focus on. My son is also biracial he is half polish and half aztec. He definitely got the best of both worlds, my looks, but olive complexion and tans easy (his mom looks straight aztec) but he got her nice lips eyelashes etc . wow she was subpoenaed and judge did nothing, don't beat yourself up for spending the money bro, I did that for years, and have a nasty taste about the justice system in my mouth still, from that and my recent incarceration all summer this past summer based on a POLICE REPORT that was dropped by da and person who filed never came to testify . Keep a line of communication open with your son and send him all the good, gentleman, productive , healthy things you are up to to plant seeds. I am rooting for u dude, we all are trust me!! hang tough my iron brother there is a light at the end of that tunnel somewhere.

PS , in cali, once he's 13, he can go in front of a judge and decide who he wants to live with - just good luck getting her to get him to show up to court, that's the battle in itself, and it sucks having to put your kid through shit, but if he's a daddys boy and does not want to live with mom and they have issues, by all means!

here if you get subpeonad for court and you do not appear you get a warrant....

 

[BLKGUY2006]

haha this is a lesser problem to have and focus on. My son is also biracial he is half polish and half aztec. He definitely got the best of both worlds, my looks, but olive complexion and tans easy (his mom looks straight aztec) but he got her nice lips eyelashes etc . wow she was subpoenaed and judge did nothing, don't beat yourself up for spending the money bro, I did that for years, and have a nasty taste about the justice system in my mouth still, from that and my recent incarceration all summer this past summer based on a POLICE REPORT that was dropped by da and person who filed never came to testify . Keep a line of communication open with your son and send him all the good, gentleman, productive , healthy things you are up to to plant seeds. I am rooting for u dude, we all are trust me!! hang tough my iron brother there is a light at the end of that tunnel somewhere.

PS , in cali, once he's 13, he can go in front of a judge and decide who he wants to live with - just good luck getting her to get him to show up to court, that's the battle in itself, and it sucks having to put your kid through shit, but if he's a daddys boy and does not want to live with mom and they have issues, by all means!

here if you get subpeonad for court and you do not appear you get a warrant....

yes, the barber shop reference is the least of concern in the big picture but we all know kids that have fucked up haircuts catch hell. He is black/white so hair isn’t so easy. His racial make up is just a sliver of my concern and worry. Like you said above, I’ve taught him to use his words or walk away unless someone put their hands on him.. In North Carolina there is actually no age. It’s determined if the child can make a reasonable decision based on the judges opinion. The problem is, he isn’t allowed to talk to me or his mother gets pissed with him. Hopefully when he’s older, he will get fed up with it and come back home. I do appreciate your thoughts and words.

 

[Muay Thai]

yes, the barber shop reference is the least of concern in the big picture but we all know kids that have fucked up haircuts catch hell. He is black/white so hair isn’t so easy. His racial make up is just a sliver of my concern and worry. Like you said above, I’ve taught him to use his words or walk away unless someone put their hands on him.. In North Carolina there is actually no age. It’s determined if the child can make a reasonable decision based on the judges opinion. The problem is, he isn’t allowed to talk to me or his mother gets pissed with him. Hopefully when he’s older, he will get fed up with it and come back home. I do appreciate your thoughts and words.

such a sticky situation man, please keep me posted if anything good transpires!

 

[scmtnboy]

Trained back today with the little man.

We recently jumped to 190 on pull downs. He gets about 5 reps on his own and I help a little to finish the set. We only tried some neutral grip chins about a month ago and he did them fresh and at 190 BW. Today we did them after his top set on pull-downs and at 198 BW and he got 4 reps. Just cool to watch the progress. He was wearing one of the oversized XL Tees I got him and he’s filling it out pretty good

 

[solarsentinel1]

Im kinda tearing up…. actually I am. Yes I’m in NC still just outside of CLT. I’m a FF, “big red truck“ and still on the truck for last 25 years. Probably 1.5 hrs to VA state line.
I’m at a loss for words right now. I just worry so much about him. He is biracial, and now in an area with zero kids that look like him. Before he left he was hearing kids say things he didn’t understand and I was preparing him for the actual “real world“ as any good father would. He is not going to know how to respond because we all know kids can be so mean. I wanted to teach him so much more, to be kind, and know what’s right and wrong. To be a better man than I am. My father, his papa set the bar SO high in that regard.
Again I appreciate ALL the kindness shown here. Solarsentinel1, I will def keep your offer in mind. Absolutely amazing kindness and I think you, sir.

Check your PMs brother.

 

[MachuFuku]

My son is eight.

I've been training crazy for a year. From obese to what I guess I would classify as heavy athletic. Now he wants to lift with me.

I really can't let him because he's very athletic in running sports and at this age puttimg him on weights,.I'm not sure is the right thing to do. But nonetheless excited to see him engage and be excited about athletics and body composition and physique.

 

[scmtnboy]

Our workout today

 

[kastro]

Our workout today
View attachment 196892

 

[scmtnboy]

Coming up on 5 months training but only been deadlifting for the last 2 months. Previous best two weeks ago was 295x3. Last week he wasn’t feeling so great and struggled with 295 so we didn’t push it. He was feeling pretty good today. I could see as we were doing warm up sets. He did 295x2 fairly easy so I said when we go for 315 if you have more reps just take them.