Buy Needles And Syringes With No Prescription
M4B Store Banner
intex
Riptropin Store banner
Generation X Bodybuilding Forum
Buy Needles And Syringes With No Prescription
Buy Needles And Syringes With No Prescription
Mysupps Store Banner
IP Gear Store Banner
PM-Ace-Labs
Ganabol Store Banner
Spend $100 and get bonus needles free at sterile syringes
Professional Muscle Store open now
sunrise2
PHARMAHGH1
kinglab
ganabol2
Professional Muscle Store open now
over 5000 supplements on sale at professional muscle store
azteca
granabolic1
napsgear-210x65
advertise1
over 5000 supplements on sale at professional muscle store
over 5000 supplements on sale at professional muscle store
ashp210
UGFREAK-banner-PM
esquel
YMSGIF210x65-Banner
over 5000 supplements on sale at professional muscle store
over 5000 supplements on sale at professional muscle store
over 5000 supplements on sale at professional muscle store
over 5000 supplements on sale at professional muscle store
over 5000 supplements on sale at professional muscle store
over 5000 supplements on sale at professional muscle store
over 5000 supplements on sale at professional muscle store

Walking Beast's Journal Of Mutilation

Walking Beast

New member
Registered
Joined
Apr 11, 2014
Messages
1,079
Hello all. This seems to be a no bullshit forum. The moderators seem to be keeping shit under control over here. Unlike MD which is filled with bullshit and worthless posters. So I decided to post a copy of my journal here and see how its recieved

A few things to keep in mind with my training. I train primarily for the vent, as an exorcism for my mind. Ive done this to keep my rage under control for nearly 20 years. This involves brutal and EXCESSIVE training and is very self destructive. Results are never the primary objective. My training now is toned down and is becoming more balanced, but my mind is all extremes so nothing will ever be balanced for me. I thrive on chaos , rage and power. Its the only thing that keeps my mind right.

You wont find anything conventional about the way I live and train, eat, etc. This is a problem for many people that are accustomed to following eachother with no ability to think for themselves. Ive never been wired that way. Ive always isolated for people as theyve been very alien to me from the beginning. So dont expect me to follow any pre determined rules you may have programmed into your brain.

The purpose of me posting here is to show a different side , a darker side to this shit. Different ways to go about shit. To spread some fire as well, for whatever your individual goals may be. Im not here to judge anyone. Peoples thoughts have never affected me and I dont give a shit what you do. Aslong as you dont talk shit about me or my lifts for no good reason, or complain and make excuses , I wont have any issues with you. Its the internet, and for me strictly business. Nothing personal.

Ive been training since I was 14. Im 33 now. I had a 2 year lay off when I ruptured 2 discs in my spine ignoring pain. Lost all my size and identity for a while. Was a complete mind fuck. I was down to 155 lbs. I rebuilt myself slowly. Eventually doing heavy core work again to stabilize my spine. Then slowly coming back into training again. Eventually well exceeding my previous size and strength. This was after a doctor told me that my days were numbered and I would never lift again.

Previous to that I had tried to come back but kept fucking myself up. I had no ability to turn my intensity down. Its not in me. So I had to stay out for a while.

My training was always very extreme. I have four ruptured discs now from ignoring pain, bone spurs, carpal tunnel and numbness in hands for past 3 years.

My chest sessions were regularly 7 hours with long rest periods and Ive always done all my sets to complete failure with massive volume.

Deadlifting and back sessions were 6-8 hours when I was 185 lbs in 2003. I was deadlifting 730 lbs off the lowest setting on power rack, with the bar behind my legs. I called this the beast lift. I dont have any limits so when I start fucking around with shit, things can get out of control. I was doing every variation of deadlifting, rack deadlifting, etc , plus all my usual training and ignoring pain. After a year and half of deadlifting I had ruptured the discs. I knew I was on my way out, so I got fucking pissed off and finished myself off. Going on a training rampage. Two years later I started climbing back.

I have not used alot of hormones as of yet. I didnt fuck with hormones until about 10 years straight into my training. Around year 9 I used M1T, so you could say that was a steroid. It was legal but more potent than any injectable Ive ever used. I was stuck at 17 3/4 inch arms. I gained about 20 lbs and my arms were around 19 inches, bench went from 370 to nearly 400 (just missed it). Then took myself out for a while.

Ruptured 2 more discs upon my return but kept killing shit. Didnt really notice it. My back is so stiff anyway.

I started using hormones on and off, mostly off, after returning from my injuries. It helped to regain my old size and go beyond my previous limits. Growth was almost non existant for me after around 200 lbs without hormones. Very fast metabolism. Maintaining my weight took massive calories and growing was very minimal.

Its been a very slow process for me, but I believe that training mostly without drugs has built the strong foundation that I have now. I dont lose much size and strength at all now when off of hormones.

My metabolism is also very slow now in my 30s. Making it much easier to add size (fat and muscle). Despite all my pain and injuries I see this time as the prime time for me to get my largest. The slower metabolism, more access to food , bodybuilding focus , and other factors should allow me to really grow despite these limitations.

My largest was 242 lbs, 5'8 barefoot, 19 1/2 inch arms, 54 1/4 inch chest (under armpits), 29 legs, all cold flexed, but big waist at that point.

I later cleaned it up in the 220s and retained most of those measurements minus about 6 inches on the waist.

When I started I was around 105-115 lbs. A bone. Progress was super slow for me, but I never made fucking excuses and I would train all day, eat as much as possible and force shit to happen. Thats why I hate to hear whining and complaining. My genetics are nothing special, just good shape, but size has always been a bitch to gain. Now its easier in some ways with slower metabolism but its a slow painful process. Especially with the self destructive way I train. Its the only vent that works for me though. I need that exorcism cuz my mind is a fucking warzone. So thats how I do shit

This is just a quick summary. There is alot more I could go into but I just wanted to give some perspective of where I am coming from. If you dont like it, Sew your fucking eyelids closed

KILLLLLL THAT SHIT !!
 
Arms, Second arm session of the week, 15 mins cardio


150 mg tramadol pre workout with 1 scoop mr.hyde and 2000 mg beta alanine added in (for muscle endurance)


I underestimated the power of 3 painkillers pre workout. My wrists had alot of stiffness and pain , elbows, etc. Three seems to be the magic number now. Two is not as effective for me, for pain, but it does seem to give me a strength boost as well. Its strange how reducing pain makes my strength start rising back up immediately. It must slow me down somehow without me realizing it. I give the same intensity regardless.

Pressdowns just felt smooth today and that allowed me to bang it out. 300 for 20 was pretty easy and I felt I had more reps in me. Next week possibly.

If I have to hit 300x50 on pressdowns, fuck it, Ill do it. I would like to boost the weight up to 400+ to get into lower reps but cannot get anymore weight on the stack. Maybe its better that way since I lack self control and am training around alot of pain and strains.

I may have to try 150 mg for chest next week . Wrist pain has been hard for that session and for back too. I have been running 150 on the heavier days but not always all at once. Taken at once works best for me.

The Mr.Hyde stimulants are great. One scoop is still all I need. 400 mg caffiene. I add an extra 2000 mg beta alanine and that gives me a good 4.5 mg dosage which is very effective for me. I can already see my reps and volume increasing.

I have only been on pre workouts for the last 6 plus months or so. No other supplementation. So now I am adding back beta alanine, and I have some creatine coming in the mail. I will try to do 5-10 grams a day if my digestion allows. This should further boost my strength and size. I am also going to try aminos intra workout which Ive never really done. Ordered Xtend. Will probably do 2 scoops during training.

Also ordered liquid aminos by twinlab to add some protein into my diet at home. This combined with the heavy eating and arms twice a week training, more bodybuilding focused training has really been bringing my size back up. The creatine and aminos I havent implemented yet, but whenever it comes in I will add it.

My bad eating days have been very infrequent, and a bad day has been 200 protein for me. In the past a bad day might be 50-100. My usual days are 225-300 protein. So hitting whole milk again and mostly all whole foods heavy is bringing me back quickly.


Adding any hormones again later down the road will just have a more amplified effect since I am bringing most of my size back without them.

Very good pump today as well. Not too painful during training overall:


(224 lbs after meal)

Curved Bar Pressdowns

KILOGRAMS unless noted

35x100 warm up

No rest til line

65x70
95x20+
-----------

No rest til line (See video)

300 lbs x 20 (3 rep PR, had more in me, maybe next week. This was second arm session so shouldve been weaker)
45x17 alternating dumbbell curls
---------

No rest til line (see video)

300x13
255x20
95x15
80x12
65x12
50x12-20
55x6 alternating db curls
45x6 alternating db curls
---------

See video for the exact rep count on pressdowns, didnt bother to memorize each set exactly. The curl portion is not included since its in another area of gym

No rest til line

300 lbs x10
255 lbs x20
95x10 (kilograms, 200-210 lb stack)
72x15
57x12-15
60x6 Slow motion style alternating DB curls
45x6 Slow but not as slow as the prior set
---------------

Straight Bar Pressdowns

no rest til line

KILOGRAMS

65x35
95x10
40x15 alternating db curls
---------------

No rest til line

Incline DB curls

60x5
50x5 alternating db curls
60x10 standing cambered bar curl
--------------------

No rest til line

alternating db curls

50x10
35x8 alt db curls
-----------------

Plate Loaded Hammer Strength Dip Machine

180x10 (Just fucking around, trying to see how it feels on joints. Cut it short due to some strain. )

Alt db curls

35x20

Straight bar pressdown

KILOGRAMS

95x20
72x20
65x25
57x40-50
50x8-10 alt db curl
35x8-10 alt db curl
-----------------

No rest til line

db laterals

40x30
40x8 alt db curls

15 mins cardio

See videos below

KILL SHIT



[ame=http://youtu.be/9MfpD0RqF88]YouTube[/ame]

[ame=http://youtu.be/rwTPoiuTt4A]YouTube[/ame]
 
Had to click PUBLISH on the last 10 or so videos for some reason. Says public now

Let me know if it works

KILLLLLLLL
 
nice tats! just wondering, is the baldness related to gear use? (possible hair loss is one of the reasons I decided to hold off AAS for a while)
 
nice tats! just wondering, is the baldness related to gear use? (possible hair loss is one of the reasons I decided to hold off AAS for a while)

Appreciate that shit


I havent noticed any baldness yet. Maybe its the lighting. My use so far has been very mild. The angle in the videos is pretty bad. I shave my head.

KILLLL THAT SHIT!!
 
Appreciate that shit


I havent noticed any baldness yet. Maybe its the lighting. My use so far has been very mild. The angle in the videos is pretty bad. I shave my head.

KILLLL THAT SHIT!!

whoops, sorry, my bad. Bald is badass anyway! Which gym is that? looks like more of a globo-gym than a hardcore one
 
whoops, sorry, my bad. Bald is badass anyway! Which gym is that? looks like more of a globo-gym than a hardcore one

Ive shaved my head since I was 14. If I started losing hair it would save me alot of work.

Always feel more wild and fierce with my head shaved. The more hair that grows back the weaker I feel. ha ha Alot of mind tricks, but whatever works.

It definately creates a freakshow the way I lift at this gym. Its LA FITNESS. I have a lifetime membership I got for 40 dollars a year, from a relative. So thats why Im there.

Aslong as I have certain equipment Im good training anywhere. Im completely zoned out once I get in there.

Feel free to post here anytime. Already this site seems much better than MD, and more similiar to sites I used back in 2004. Back then I moderated a few sites and there were a few that had a very good atmosphere without the judgement, and spreading fire. So its good to see that here

KILLLL THAT SHIT !!
 
IM all for training intense, but please tell me the 7 hour long training sessions are a thing of your youthful past.
 
IM all for training intense, but please tell me the 7 hour long training sessions are a thing of your youthful past.

Pretty much. The abuse that it would do to my body at the weights I use now, with all these new strains, would make it impossible for me to even function outside of the gym, let alone train.

Maybe now its more like 3 hour range, but havent timed them. The difference is now I will actually leave when my joints start to get real sore. I move alot quicker between sets most of the time so that the weights are harder. I use rest pause, dropsets, heavy pre exhaustion, supersets, slow reps, held contractions and techniques like that to hit the muscle just as hard but sometimes with only half of the weight. Slow reps with held contractions, especially for back, has really blown my back up and keep my limbs attached. I squeeze the weight as hard and deep as I can to get a cramping sensation in my lats and I really feel the weight pulling the muscle apart now. So my training now is mostly focused on increasing muscle pain for growth. I try to put myself in as much pain as possible without breaking anything, then repeat.

For many years I felt invincible as far as my muscles and joints. I could do extreme training all day and have very little pain. Recover super quick and be back at that shit the next day. Now my body and innards are all much more torn up.

Some of my arm sessions lately are maybe around 2 hours since its so fast moving. Ill hit 40-50 sets often in that period. All sets to failure (muscle or tendon failure) and then Ill hit arms a second time in the week. With my wrists being so torn up its been tough on the limbs.

I train 5 times a week currently.

KEEP KILLIN THAT SHIT !!
 
Last edited:
About to go hit chest or back. Chest most likely since arms are torn up.


To give an idea where im at currently. This is my arm from a few days ago



Back to 18 3/4 cold, down from 19 1/2 but getting back. Training arms twice a week and heavy eating has been bringing the size back quickly.

No hormones for over 6 months. No supplements except pre workout drinks before training.

Chest/ back measurement, under armpits is in the 54 inch range. Waist 38 1/2 after a meal, and around navel 42.

Would like to climb back up and hit 20 inch + on the arms before leaning. Hate to lose muscle even though it comes back fast.

Recent as well




And this was the last back shot I took



My back is up about an inch now to 54 1/4 inches, and waist the same as in that picture. However I am maching my back/chest measurement that I had at a sloppy 242, int he 220s now. So am growing yearly still. Arms grow at a crawl however

I will possibly try 225 for reps on bench again and post a video. Maybe 30 plus today. 52 was my best. Without spotter I am in a bad position , high on bench, but Ive still hit 42 doing it that way. This would be my second time benching in many months.

KILLLLL THAT SHIT
 
Chest and delts


Super light and low volume today. Some time constraints as well. Good to get some pump though. Fast moving and growth is the main focus now, while trying to heal up somewhat.

Joints felt ok on the flat bench portion after the extenstive bar warm up and 150 mg tramadol pre workout.

Still weak though. The endurance will have to be built back up since this is only my second week back fucking around with flat bench, after many months off from the movement.

The 225 for 25 was the only ballstic and fast set though. Everything else is very slow and controlled. Flies are done slow with long holds.

Next week will do another set with 225 and try to add some reps:


(224 lbs after meal)


Flat Bench Press

Bar x 200 plus reps, then stretches to each side
135x30 warm up
225x25 (see video. 27 reps off from best. Weak set. Second week back benching)
225x11 (Slow paused reps)

db laterals

40x40

225x9 (slow paused reps, bench again)


Incline Dumbbell presses

no rest til line

60x50
50x20 db laterals
--------------

Incline db presses

no rest til line

80x25
50x20 db laterals
--------------

no rest til line

80x20 incline db presses
60x15 db laterals
--------------


Seated Machine Flies

235x12 (long holds)

No rest til line

All long holds

310x8
265x7
205x7-8
175x8-10
160x10
---------------

Db laterals

no rest til line

65x25
50x15
50x10
--------

10 mins cardio

Fucked around with some tricep extentions on a home gym machine later

KILL SHIT


Video in link below

YouTube
 
Last edited:
Cool man. I can appreciate doing you your own thing for your own reasons. A lot of us get stuck in a certain mindset and its hard to escape.
 
Cool man. I can appreciate doing you your own thing for your own reasons. A lot of us get stuck in a certain mindset and its hard to escape.

Appreciate that shit brother


It seems most are caught up in putting a clear definition on everything, when they dont even know why and what the fuck they are doing in thier own lives. Doing shit to impress some assholes and a plastic trophy. To me if there is not a deeper reason for doing something than that, then its a fucking joke. If thats what it takes for someone to be motivated then they truly lack that fire.

For me the gym is a temple where I perform exorcisms on myself. To deal with my demons. Its much better than the alternative routes I could have chosen. Its self destructive but its nothing compared to what could be. Its given me a certain amount of control over those demons. Tearing my body apart to exhaustion is a good vent while it lasts. The force feeding I could do without, but thats part of the process unfortunately.

There are many different reasons to lift weights. Its good to see that you understand a different perspective. Clearly it shows with the work youve put in

KEEP KILLIN THAT SHIT !!
 
This thread feels like I'm reading the Sin City comic books and the main guy was really into lifting

Sent from my DROID RAZR using Tapatalk
 
This thread feels like I'm reading the Sin City comic books and the main guy was really into lifting

Sent from my DROID RAZR using Tapatalk

This book has a very messy ending :(
 






KILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
 
Arms and 15 mins cardio

100 mg tramadol pre workout with 1 scoop mr. hyde, 5 grams creatine, 2 extra grams beta alanine

Arms torn up as usual, prior to the session. Some extra bicep strain so kept those extra light. Elbows were good enough, but wrists became a problem during my 300 for 25 set of pressdowns. I couldve hit 30 plus today easily but I felt that shooting numbness into my hands the last few reps, so I decided to back off and save some reps for next time.

Most sets not done to complete failure but I wanted to keep shit strict and avoid restraining anything. This is the first arm session of the week, and the second session will come at the end of the week. Plus I still have back to hit. Getting arms twice weekly has been very good for bringing back thier growth , plus the heavier eating. So I want to continue that trend and not completely anihilate my tendons today.

Just started creatine and liquid aminos again. So the liquid aminos will add 15-30 protein daily. The creatine I will take 10 grams a day for several weeks, aslong as it doesnt give me too much acid in throat. So far its managable.

Also got powdered beta alanine to add to my pre workout drink, mr. hyde. That gives me alot of extra reps and endurance to hit the high volume thats typical for me. Even though I do much less volume now overall, its still alot at times.

Next up is Xtend powdered aminos for during training. I never really did intra workout shit. So thatll be new. Ill try that when it comes in soon.

Im trying to take every OTC advantage I can get now since I havent fucked with hormones in well over 6 months. Regaining most of my size without at the moment.

Eatining heavily a huge factor in that . The supplements give a slight edge only. :


(221 lbs after meal, had a few bad eating days, not enough food)


Incline Dumbbell Spider Curls (New exercise. Chest is supported on incline bench, arms hang down with dumbbells. Curl up)



35x15

No rest til line

50x8
45x8 alternating db curls
------------

no rest til line

50x8
45x8 alt db curls
---------

no rest til line

50x8
45x8 alt db curls
------------

Curved bar pressdowns


KILOGRAMS for pressdowns unless noted otherwise

No rest til line

35x100
65x40
--------

alt db curls

40x16

Curved bar pressdowns

No rest til line

95x50 (around 210 lb stack)
45x12 alt db curls
-----------

No rest til line

See video

300 lbs x 25 (two 45s pinned to stack. PR. Couldve hit 30 plus today, was very light, but decided against it. Shooting numbness in hands for last 3 or so reps. Will save some reps for next time)

45x15 alt db curls
-----------

No rest til line

300 lbs x15
255 lbs x15
95 kilos x15
72 kilos x15
57 kilos x10-15
45x10 alt db curls
---------

Short Straight Bar Pressdowns

KILOGRAMS for all pressdowns from this point on

no rest til line

65x30
95x15
45x10 alt db curls
---------

No rest til line

95x30
72x15
57x15-20

45x10 alt db curls
--------

No rest til line

95x30
72x20
57x20
45x10 alt db curls
--------------

Alt db curls

35x15 (very slow and held at top)

No rest til line

alt db curls

60x8
50x5
35x8-10
--------

alt db curls

40x12


15 mins cardio

KILL SHIT

video below

[ame=http://youtu.be/Gz4PSdpXlGc]Curved Bar Pressdowns 300x25 - YouTube[/ame]
 
It seems most are caught up in putting a clear definition on everything, when they dont even know why and what the fuck they are doing in thier own lives. Doing shit to impress some assholes and a plastic trophy. To me if there is not a deeper reason for doing something than that, then its a fucking joke. If thats what it takes for someone to be motivated then they truly lack that fire.

For me the gym is a temple where I perform exorcisms on myself. To deal with my demons. Its much better than the alternative routes I could have chosen. Its self destructive but its nothing compared to what could be. Its given me a certain amount of control over those demons. Tearing my body apart to exhaustion is a good vent while it lasts. The force feeding I could do without, but thats part of the process unfortunately.

There are many different reasons to lift weights. Its good to see that you understand a different perspective. Clearly it shows with the work youve put in

KEEP KILLIN THAT SHIT !!

First paragraph: who says they truly lack that fire, you? Because they don't go into the gym for hours on end to destroy their bodies means they lack that fire?

Second paragraph: so what happens to you when you can't go to the gym for hours to "exercise your demons"? You justify it to yourself because there are other worse things that you could be doing. Your body is falling apart from all of this to the point you are taking pain killers pre workout and getting new strains daily according to reading your posts.

Everybody here can appreciate intensity, but you seem to be self loathing and extremely angry, that's not good. I have many many issues of my own and I've chosen things in my past that were very self destructive ways to deal with them. Replacing one self destructive way with another is counterproductive. That's an alcoholic replacing liquor with beer or a junkie replacing coke with meth. It seems that you actually enjoy the feeling of pain to the point that you seek to injure yourself.

If I came across as "preachy" or anything like that I apologize. I just don't like seeing people in pain or hurting themselves. I'm not trying to come across as judgmental at all, just trying to look out for you
 
Last edited:

Forum statistics

Total page views
558,024,288
Threads
135,751
Messages
2,768,515
Members
160,339
Latest member
Dann828
NapsGear
HGH Power Store email banner
your-raws
Prowrist straps store banner
infinity
FLASHING-BOTTOM-BANNER-210x131
raws
Savage Labs Store email
Syntherol Site Enhancing Oil Synthol
aqpharma
yourmuscleshop210x131
hulabs
ezgif-com-resize-2-1
MA Research Chem store banner
MA Supps Store Banner
volartek
Keytech banner
musclechem
Godbullraw-bottom-banner
Injection Instructions for beginners
Knight Labs store email banner
3
ashp131
YMS-210x131-V02
Back
Top