clean off heroin

[mikeyp123]

hey everyone i dont know if any of you guys remember me but im back and im almost a year clean but heres the thing im clean in the sense that i dont shoot heroin anymore i almost died and i lost it when my lifting buddy died. I gained 40 lbs of weight i didnt want and ive been walking 2-4 hrs a day to lose that and im almost back to where i was weight was. now heres the thing im on methadone please dont judge me as it was this or death i didnt have the will to go on im sorry but its true im a former marine and all the loss was to much this was the one that put me over the edge. so im back i love this forum and i wanted to ask what and if anyone shared and experience strenth or hope with these same things and also can u take suppps like growht if on methadone thanks all ive been tested to as ive actually had the drug in my hand and said no so im back for sure god is with me and i mean that he always has been again im back so excited to feel alive

 

[PitbullTank]

sorry, was going to say about some experiences with a family member but decided to delete after posting...

Just be very cautious brother.... be HONEST with yourself if prepping a syringe and shooting yourself is going to give you relapse urges as a trigger... its not worth dealing with those cravings from what I've seen...

 

[Heath82]

Honestly messing with ur hormones right now is probably not a good idea. Get in the gym and get ur mind in a good place and let that be ur focus. Good luck brother!

 

[richiec]

sorry, was going to say about some experiences with a family member but decided to delete after posting...

Just be very cautious brother.... be HONEST with yourself if prepping a syringe and shooting yourself is going to give you relapse urges as a trigger... its not worth dealing with those cravings from what I've seen...

Agreed, as an addict that dealt with syringes and needles, it may not be wise to jump into dealing with them right now. Take more time and get completely clean, off the methadone. You obviously still have opioids in your system from methadone, and as Pit said, it could be a trigger that sends you back down the rabbit hole. I'm more than ecstatic for you for kicking the heroin, but take more time buddy. I had a very long bout with pain meds (oxy's) and coke that was difficult to kick, but I did. I had to steer clear from certain things and people as they were triggers. Be careful my friend, it's a slippery slope and I'd hate to see you relapse, I know it's a tough thing to do but you CAN do it!

 

[mikeyp123]

thank you all

thanks guys for giving me the truth. I will just continue with the hard work on recovery journey. the thing is methadone is a full agonist and kills all the cravings i just am worried after i come off but ill wait till im very strong and do it the right way thanks again everyone

 

[Growman]

Very happy for you brother. Just worry about staying clean, working out will make you feel great especially if you lose the weight.

Like pitbull and richiec said no need to even take a chance. besides you can lose weight without taking anything.

If you stay clean everything else will fall into place...

 

[ALLEX]

 

[growing1221]

Congrats! But be careful with methadone,people become very addicted to that. Are you in any support groups or in treatment at all?

 

[rmoney84]

First off congrats brother. Secondly, don't trade one addiction for another. Thats not to say you cannot ever use gear cause you are an addict but its too soon. You do not want to move from one substance to another to deal with whatever led you here in the first place. Work your steps, work on yourself from the inside out. Good luck brother.

 

[sub7percent]

be careful. its a disease of attitudes an behaviors, that include drug use, and its unique in how it manifests in each individual. i know where you're at, and a year is a major accomplishment. my personal preference would be to get off the methadone before focusing on bodybuilding and using things like AAS and HGH. That said, exercising and eating healthy should definitely be part of your recovery; but as you probably know recovery is a spiritual process.

If methadone is what you need to keep you off heroin, then use it, no judgement. But in the end to be free from drugs you'll need to come off it, its not something you want to take for a while. Ever see people who have been on that shit for years? Teeth falling out, bones all fucked up. I came off suboxone 24mg and it was hell for 4 weeks, methadone is at least the same, so taper if you can.

if you need anything PM me i have experience.

 

[asteelz]

Been down that road as well, clean for 3 years. Best advice I can give is to be honest with yourself. You get high because you want to , if you decide to use Its because you wanted to use. No excuses, don't blame others , don't blame events , circumstance, etc. that helped me greatly in staying clean

 

[richiec]

Been down that road as well, clean for 3 years. Best advice I can give is to be honest with yourself. You get high because you want to , if you decide to use Its because you wanted to use. No excuses, don't blame others , don't blame events , circumstance, etc. that helped me greatly in staying clean

I don't fully agree with that statement.

Some people use and/or drink because that's their coping mechanism, they don't properly deal with their problems/emotions. That typically leads to addiction, it helps them "function" in day-to-day life rather than actually having to deal with it. They mask whatever it is with drugs, then they need them. Not everyone simply gets high because they want to get high. I used to drink because I thought it helped me be more social and have better self esteem, it made become a dick that nobody wanted to be around. That was my coping mechanism with low self esteem despite everyone thinking I had it all together, I was a mess inside. Same for me and drugs, I used coke and pills to help me in social settings and became a friggin junkie. Some people do get high because they want to, others do it to cope, we can't use blanket statements when it comes to addiction.

BTW, I'm proud of you for being clean for 3 years, that's awesome!!!

 

[ripped103]

I feel bad for you but by going on methadone which is long acting compared to heroin ,your putting yourself in a worse place unless you plan on staying on methadone.
Heroin detox is 3 weeks while methadone can be months.
I'm currently on methadone ,oxycodone and a bunch of other meds through pain management.i will never be off of medicine for the rest of my life cause of serious injury .
Hey methadone does not make you feel like your on anything,so if it helps you live life I wish you the best
If you want to talk pm me

 

[johnjuanb1]

I'm glad to beat heroine. That takes a lot of serious balls. I can only imagine the strength that took, so congratulations!

Like others mentioned, needles need to be avoided. Avoid anyone you associated with heroine. I had to do that with crystal users. I still have one friend who is an addict. Even after 7 years clean I still slipped for a few days because I went to that friend's house and he had it right in front of me.
I try to only talk to him on the phone. I hate that drug, and I'm watching him destroy himself. I gave him a bunch of Kratom to help come off, which worked for awhile, until some girl he has sex with showed up and did the drug in front of him.
Kratom is one way to slowly lower your methadone dose over time. It has aklyloids similar to nolaxolone so you can't overdose on Kratom. It has two alkyloids that are partial agonists to the mu-opiod receptor which is helpful when tapering off opiates or other drugs.

That's great that you dropped your body weight back down. Walking is one of my favorite things to clear my mind and get the endorphins going.
I never got addicted to heroine, but I was an addict to OxyContin, nubain, temgesic, crystal meth, etc.
Heroine scared the shit out of me. I iv'd it with crystal and thought I was going to die. I'm lucky that it scared too much to get into it.

You asked if HGH works while on methadone. Opiates are actually HGH releasers so I would assume HGH products will work. If you use supplements, stick to orals.
MK677 and Anamorelin are two oral HGH secretagogues that release as much HGH as atleast 4ius synthetic HGH. They work very well; better than HGH in many respects.

There are also oral testosterone boosters like LGD-4033 and Ostarine(MK-2866) which will dramatically raise testosterone.

Another cool alternative is called Enclomiphine citrate. In human trials it was just as effective at raising testosterone and spermatogenesis as testosterone replacement therapy. The only reason the FDA hasn't approved it yet is they are stalling because society deems testosterone use as bad. Enclomiphine is in stage 3 human trials and I think 4-6 times more effective than the traditional clomid.

Stay strong, and take things one day at a time. It's unfortunate this life has so much pain and loss. The pain often over shadows the beauty around us. There is beauty everywhere in life. You just have to have an open mind and seek it out.

I'm glad you're back and posting. Thank you for opening up. Much respect!!!

 

[Mike Arnold]

While it would obviously be better to not use any opiates from an internal health standpoint, the TRUTH of the matter is that opiates really aren't that damaging to the internal organs--in comparison to most other drugs. Yes, they will fuck up your HPTA (but so do AAS, and far worse, so if they are a part of your life it doesn't really matter) and cause some digestive issues, but that's really about it in terms of what you'll notice. Most people could live a long life without any serious health issues while taking opiates every day.

Now, while I am NOT advising this course of action, the TRUTH of the matter is that it is better BY FAR to be on controlled opiates and NOT be in fucking misery every day of your life, than to be "clean" and be fucking miserable. Let me clarify that statement, as I am sure some guys here are thinking "what the fuck?"

My point is this. I have seen 100's of people (I used to work in the addiction field and was a hardcore addict myself) who are taught that they must be off "all" opiates--even opiate maintenance (i.e. methadone, buprenorphine)--in order to achieve recovery and live a good, healthy life. They are told they are not "really clean" if they use those prescriptions and consequently, are guilted into either forgoing opiate maintenance altogether, or employing it for only a short time...only to live an absolutely miserable life full of struggle and hardship for years, if not decades.

What fucking good is "being of all opiates" if you are a fucking miserable wreck who is constantly depressed, can't sleep, is struggling with constant cravings, never feels like they are "right" inside, and requires the constant assistance of support groups and other individuals just to get through "one day at a time", all while surrounding yourself with people who are continually focused on their addiction and preaching "recovery"? Sounds like a shitty fucking like to me...and it is...because I lived it...until the light bulb finally turned on and I realized I didn't have too.

I was already clean for 5 years when I realized this--and even after all that time I was still dealing with all the things I mentioned above...and more. Overall, I was not happy--because I couldn't be. The PERMANENT damage I had done to my brain through years of opiate abuse had taken their toll and I could never crawl out from under it...because it was not a choice, it was brain damage that could never be repaired. Sure, I could've fought to "stay off all opiates" and probably did it, but at what cost, especially when this path had already been proven a most difficult and unhappy one?

When I finally said "fuck this shit, it isn't worth it. I want to live life free of the bonds and pains of being "opiate free", it was then that my life improved immeasurably. in short, I went on buprenorphine...and have now been on it every day for the last 10 years. Aside from having to put a few pills under my tongue once per day, and having some digestive problems, I am happy as all hell. I feel GREAT! I sleep like a baby, I am always at peace (something I never had even after 5 years of being because my body could no longer attain peace, from a chemical standpoint, on its own steam), and every struggle or problem I had disappeared instantly. I haven't craved a single opiate, aside from buprenorphine, and this would only happen on the days I would run out, such as when I would go on vacation and accidentally forget to bring enough pills with me, etc). Aside from this my life isn't impaired in any way...and I take an absolutely massive dose of opiates (i.e. buprenorphine) every day.


So, for the people whose lives have turned into an absolute disaster devoid of happiness and internal contentment, even after being off all opiates for an extended period of time and earnestly applying oneself to the recovery process (support groups, 12-step programs, etc)A.A., N.A, etc)...perhaps these people would do WELL to STOP listening to anyone who tells them they can't find a true recovery with opiate maintenance.

In terms of opiate maintenance, buprenorphine is greatly preferable to methadone--for several reasons.

The bottom line is that we all need to do whatever it takes to live as normal of a life as possible. If that means opiate maintenance, then so be it. It is certainly better than allowing one's life to become a living hell just so that person can wave the "opiate free" flag. The bottom line is that being opiate free doesn't mean jack shit when life sucks....and sorry, but waiting around for 10-15 years in the hope that life's hell would eventually go away wasn't an appealing option. Life isn't long enough to throw away that much time.

 

[rgrmedic]

I was shooting heroin a few years back when I got out of the Army.. Steroids never kicked any feelings or cravings up.. Different kind of needle. I just started gh and I'll tell ya the other morning I had a slin pin and my hand and I started thinking about it.. Fleeting thought but enough to get butterflies in my stomach.. Def something to be aware of

 

[richiec]

Good post Mike Arnold, some people legit need something due to the damage excessive opiate use has caused. Prolonged use has effects that many times are not repairable. If it is possible, the best option is to be completely free from them, but there are circumstance (all individual) where they are needed. Feeling crappy initially when coming off isn't a good enough reason to "hop on" (I don't think you're even eluding to that in the slightest) but if after some time you can't get it together, then it's time to consider that road.

I was fortunate that I didn't need any of that, I was able to come off completely without any serious long term complications. I hate when doctors look at each person the same as the others, when we are all different. Our bodies handle things differently and our makeup varies greatly from you to me to him to her. It's an individual thing that needs to be approached as such

 

[asteelz]

I don't fully agree with that statement.

Some people use and/or drink because that's their coping mechanism, they don't properly deal with their problems/emotions. That typically leads to addiction, it helps them "function" in day-to-day life rather than actually having to deal with it. They mask whatever it is with drugs, then they need them. Not everyone simply gets high because they want to get high. I used to drink because I thought it helped me be more social and have better self esteem, it made become a dick that nobody wanted to be around. That was my coping mechanism with low self esteem despite everyone thinking I had it all together, I was a mess inside. Same for me and drugs, I used coke and pills to help me in social settings and became a friggin junkie. Some people do get high because they want to, others do it to cope, we can't use blanket statements when it comes to addiction.

BTW, I'm proud of you for being clean for 3 years, that's awesome!!!

i see your point, but to play devils advocate.. ultimately you drank the drink because you wanted to feel at ease in a social setting. you made the choice to have the drink. take a step back further, you chose to enter the social situation knowing that alcohol would likely come into play based on the anxiety of said setting.

this is especially true when somebody is clean for a long period of time and relapses. they did not relapse because life held them down against their will and stuck a needle in their arm. they chose to purchase and administer the drugs regardless of what the intended outcome was. to get high, to fit in, to feel comfortable in society, whatever it may be it always starts with a choice. such is free will.

variable opinions always exist in regards to addiction and treatment, and its ok to agree to disagree. glad to see you are on the up and up as well my friend.

 

[asteelz]

While it would obviously be better to not use any opiates from an internal health standpoint, the TRUTH of the matter is that opiates really aren't that damaging to the internal organs--in comparison to most other drugs. Yes, they will fuck up your HPTA (but so do AAS, and far worse, so if they are a part of your life it doesn't really matter) and cause some digestive issues, but that's really about it in terms of what you'll notice. Most people could live a long life without any serious health issues while taking opiates every day.

Now, while I am NOT advising this course of action, the TRUTH of the matter is that it is better BY FAR to be on controlled opiates and NOT be in fucking misery every day of your life, than to be "clean" and be fucking miserable. Let me clarify that statement, as I am sure some guys here are thinking "what the fuck?"

My point is this. I have seen 100's of people (I used to work in the addiction field and was a hardcore addict myself) who are taught that they must be off "all" opiates--even opiate maintenance (i.e. methadone, buprenorphine)--in order to achieve recovery and live a good, healthy life. They are told they are not "really clean" if they use those prescriptions and consequently, are guilted into either forgoing opiate maintenance altogether, or employing it for only a short time...only to live an absolutely miserable life full of struggle and hardship for years, if not decades.

What fucking good is "being of all opiates" if you are a fucking miserable wreck who is constantly depressed, can't sleep, is struggling with constant cravings, never feels like they are "right" inside, and requires the constant assistance of support groups and other individuals just to get through "one day at a time", all while surrounding yourself with people who are continually focused on their addiction and preaching "recovery"? Sounds like a shitty fucking like to me...and it is...because I lived it...until the light bulb finally turned on and I realized I didn't have too.

I was already clean for 5 years when I realized this--and even after all that time I was still dealing with all the things I mentioned above...and more. Overall, I was not happy--because I couldn't be. The PERMANENT damage I had done to my brain through years of opiate abuse had taken their toll and I could never crawl out from under it...because it was not a choice, it was brain damage that could never be repaired. Sure, I could've fought to "stay off all opiates" and probably did it, but at what cost, especially when this path had already been proven a most difficult and unhappy one?

When I finally said "fuck this shit, it isn't worth it. I want to live life free of the bonds and pains of being "opiate free", it was then that my life improved immeasurably. in short, I went on buprenorphine...and have now been on it every day for the last 10 years. Aside from having to put a few pills under my tongue once per day, and having some digestive problems, I am happy as all hell. I feel GREAT! I sleep like a baby, I am always at peace (something I never had even after 5 years of being because my body could no longer attain peace, from a chemical standpoint, on its own steam), and every struggle or problem I had disappeared instantly. I haven't craved a single opiate, aside from buprenorphine, and this would only happen on the days I would run out, such as when I would go on vacation and accidentally forget to bring enough pills with me, etc). Aside from this my life isn't impaired in any way...and I take an absolutely massive dose of opiates (i.e. buprenorphine) every day.


So, for the people whose lives have turned into an absolute disaster devoid of happiness and internal contentment, even after being off all opiates for an extended period of time and earnestly applying oneself to the recovery process (support groups, 12-step programs, etc)A.A., N.A, etc)...perhaps these people would do WELL to STOP listening to anyone who tells them they can't find a true recovery with opiate maintenance.

In terms of opiate maintenance, buprenorphine is greatly preferable to methadone--for several reasons.

The bottom line is that we all need to do whatever it takes to live as normal of a life as possible. If that means opiate maintenance, then so be it. It is certainly better than allowing one's life to become a living hell just so that person can wave the "opiate free" flag. The bottom line is that being opiate free doesn't mean jack shit when life sucks....and sorry, but waiting around for 10-15 years in the hope that life's hell would eventually go away wasn't an appealing option. Life isn't long enough to throw away that much time.

Irony to your statement is that the data say long term treatment with bupreorphine shows no impairment of cognitivie or motor function. One may argue long term impairment of neurotransmitter function, but so could a billion other medications.

 

[richiec]

i see your point, but to play devils advocate.. ultimately you drank the drink because you wanted to feel at ease in a social setting. you made the choice to have the drink. take a step back further, you chose to enter the social situation knowing that alcohol would likely come into play based on the anxiety of said setting.

this is especially true when somebody is clean for a long period of time and relapses. they did not relapse because life held them down against their will and stuck a needle in their arm. they chose to purchase and administer the drugs regardless of what the intended outcome was. to get high, to fit in, to feel comfortable in society, whatever it may be it always starts with a choice. such is free will.

variable opinions always exist in regards to addiction and treatment, and its ok to agree to disagree. glad to see you are on the up and up as well my friend.

Most def, however I started drinking at the tender age of 14. I wanted to "fit in" with the crowd so to speak. I didn't initially know there would be alcohol, but that's splitting hairs. My father is a recovering alcoholic/drug addict and has been clean for 26 years, he begged and pleaded with me to never start, but I obviously knew better

I do see your side of the coin and I definitely agree with relapsing. When one is "in" their addiction, there is the need to continue using. Once clean for some time, it is always a matter of will power. My father just retired from addiction counseling and he certainly agrees as do most others with common sense. I've had down right crappy days, weeks and months but have never picked up again...not worth it to me. I make the conscious decision every day NOT to pick up, been clean for over 8 years from everything. Some days are bad, I can smell coke and it triggers the memories, but I shrug em off and laugh because I'm not driving to the dope house, rather to work or the gym!