- Joined
- Oct 4, 2013
- Messages
- 132
please don't attack each other for personal beliefs in this thread. sate your side, your beliefs and what works for you.
I am looking for help. not arguments.
a few of you all may have read months ago that I am rededicating my self to my wife and trying to be trustworthy after a long battle with my past.
I had a religious customer in my shop this week who helped me with my anguish that I cannot let my shame and guilt go from my own bad decisions and those of a crappy childhood where my ,mother would preach to me and send me to church regularly but bring several men home and married a few. I was on my own at 12 even though I lived in the house. I have never been faitful to my dear wife who still loves me and now I am trying to love her. I don't trust anyone never have due to the past.
He told me to cast the past in the sea of forgetfulness because satan uses it against me to lead me into bad habits. the I went to church this morning and the sermon was on Cast off your burdens and follow Jesus , his yoke is light and burdens few. talk about kismet!!! Then, after church, I had a long drive to make for work and asked God , why I have had so many revelations and de ja vu this week? No sooner did I ask that I was passing a car with a license plate with my wife's name on it. "Trina's" how freaky is that?
so I can hear a good message, plan to implement it, want to implement it bt when I wake or hours go by, I feel horrible again and want to pursue bad behavior. I may be mentally deficient or ill but would like to reach out here to see what works for you.
I have had a road to Damascus in my life but it was such a "high" it lasted a week and got me out of the navy on a psyche discharge a year early and in time to meet my wife of thirty years in a town I hadn't lived in since I was 6. im scared to "buy" into religion again.
Thanks brothers
I am looking for help. not arguments.
a few of you all may have read months ago that I am rededicating my self to my wife and trying to be trustworthy after a long battle with my past.
I had a religious customer in my shop this week who helped me with my anguish that I cannot let my shame and guilt go from my own bad decisions and those of a crappy childhood where my ,mother would preach to me and send me to church regularly but bring several men home and married a few. I was on my own at 12 even though I lived in the house. I have never been faitful to my dear wife who still loves me and now I am trying to love her. I don't trust anyone never have due to the past.
He told me to cast the past in the sea of forgetfulness because satan uses it against me to lead me into bad habits. the I went to church this morning and the sermon was on Cast off your burdens and follow Jesus , his yoke is light and burdens few. talk about kismet!!! Then, after church, I had a long drive to make for work and asked God , why I have had so many revelations and de ja vu this week? No sooner did I ask that I was passing a car with a license plate with my wife's name on it. "Trina's" how freaky is that?
so I can hear a good message, plan to implement it, want to implement it bt when I wake or hours go by, I feel horrible again and want to pursue bad behavior. I may be mentally deficient or ill but would like to reach out here to see what works for you.
I have had a road to Damascus in my life but it was such a "high" it lasted a week and got me out of the navy on a psyche discharge a year early and in time to meet my wife of thirty years in a town I hadn't lived in since I was 6. im scared to "buy" into religion again.
Thanks brothers