RIP POP

[tonka2]

WELL PMers at 4:00 my father passsed.I did get to tell him i loved him.He told me he loved me and he was sorry.The sorry was not needed i know that.I found something last nite.I found my father.I never thought i would say this but i wish i could be half the man he is or has become.He is not the man he was when i left home.I never thought we could show each other so much love.I will carie his strength with me the rest of my life.He was not afraid at all at least not that we could tell they took him off the drugs for about 12 hours besides the tube he was fine.He sat up the hole time joked on a peace of papper and told everyone he love them.I will say i think i am in shock though i feel no emotion.The reason for this is i think the hospital messed up real bad he was no supposed to feel a thing.they gave him the stuff to nock him out.I was sitting there and my mom looked at me and i gave the nod that it was time to take him off the machine the nurse said he was a sleep.HE WAS NOT!BUT IT was to late to stop.HIS eyes opened then he tried to get out of bed.I had to hold my father down so he would die.I am not sure how that makes me feel.I know its not my falt but i did give the go head.WHY didnt they give him a test to make sure he was out.this was not the body just reacting.He could here us he was taking his close off becauce he was hot.I am glad my family left and no one had to see that.I hope he knows i am sorry thats not what we wanted.I hope he knows i held him out of LOVE!Well i dont have much to say.Thank you all.I ope i can take the good from this and not turn it inward and have more anger.I guess only time will tell.To any who is or will be going threw this i am here for you.LATER

 

[pirate67_2000]

My prayers are with you bro. I cant even imagine how hard that was. Be strong. Seek God he will be there

 

[MAINEVENT]

Sorry for your loss tonka. You and your father have been in my prayers this past week....and i will still keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

If you need ANYTHING just pm me!

 

[Sigmund Roid]

Tonka, it sounds like you handled things in the very best way you could have.

The situation you describe is very, very, difficult and there is no easy way to go through it. You've done well. I enjoyed the first few sentences of this post. I am glad you were able to talk to your father and express your feelings.

 

[PHIL HERNON]

TONKA

I KNOW YOU ARE FEELING SAD........KEEP HIM ALIVE IN YOUR THOUGHTS AND HE WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU.

 

[tonka2]

Hey guys I am not just going to ask this question just out of anger.But is there anything i can do for what my father went threw at the end.I mean legaly.The nurse said they gave him all the medicine they could in that period and they did bump it up.His doc that was in this with him for the whole thing.said that they would make sure he would pass in his sleep.The doc was not there when this happened.Why didnt they make sure he was out.Then they justed watched for awhile because they didnt want to give more meds, because they didnt want to get in trouble.They finally fixed it when me and my brother started freaking out.I hate to think of the nite mears my mom is going to have.Do you think i am over reacting.I know what i saw.I also dont want to disrespect how calm and strong my father was.HE did deserve better.It sholud not have went that way.

 

[mrsoul]

God bless you and your family. very sorry for your loss.

 

[buffbabeca]

May your father RIP and i am glad u got to speak with him.

 

[mrsoul]

Hey guys I am not just going to ask this question just out of anger.But is there anything i can do for what my father went threw at the end.I mean legaly.The nurse said they gave him all the medicine they could in that period and they did bump it up.His doc that was in this with him for the whole thing.said that they would make sure he would pass in his sleep.The doc was not there when this happened.Why didnt they make sure he was out.Then they justed watched for awhile because they didnt want to give more meds, because they didnt want to get in trouble.They finally fixed it when me and my brother started freaking out.I hate to think of the nite mears my mom is going to have.Do you think i am over reacting.I know what i saw.I also dont want to disrespect how calm and strong my father was.HE did deserve better.It sholud not have went that way.

my experience in a similar situation is that at first i wanted to take vengenace out on someone for my loss. right or wrong, taking action against the hospital will not help you heal from your loss. seek God instead of vengenace. try to forgive and you will heal. i was in therapy one time and we were going over some things between my father and me and i got angry and told my therapist" i will never do that to my son". she repied " the only way to insure you don't is to forgive your Dad and heal yourself". losing someone is traumatic and brings on a ton of emotions. don't make it worse by feeding the negative. good luck bro.

 

[gearheadz]

Very sad bro and I am glad u got to know him. Be thankful you at least got to see and know your father. May he RIP

 

[wakejump4me]

i am sorry to hear that . i feel you . my cousin , she was 34 , passed away on wednesday and my father is battling as of now

wake

 

[Big Ed]

be the best you can be that is all he could ask!

 

[thebrick]

I am sorry for your loss. Focus on the positive words that were said at the end and find some comfort in that. I think everyone did their best in a very, very difficult situation.

 

[Amazon Doll]

Death is rarely pretty.

If they had him on a morphine drip at a high dose, it was just his body reacting, not his mind. I went thru the same thing with my mother and it was not fun. We all have to go at sometime and it is not always peaceful. The hospital did what they coud, so don't blame them for what happened. It is tramatic to have those as the last memories of our parents and I carried the vision of my mom fighting at the last moment as well. It was just the body's reaction to the amount of drugs in his system.

 

[A50#]

tonka2, I'm sorry about your pops brother. I lost both of my parents a few years ago and I know it's not an easy time.

 

[Tom]

Sorry....

I'm sorry for your loss. After a time the sadness fades but the happy memories are there forever. Your dad is at peace now and will be with you always. Continue to talk to him.....he hears you.

 

[muscledoc1]

i AM VERY SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR LOSS.

 

[speedbacker]

Very sorry for your loss Tonka. You and your family will be in our prayers.

 

[b-boy]

sorry for your loss

so sorry bro to hear about your dad... you and your family are in my prayers.

 

[shoestring]

May god bless you & your family.