Getting the Partner to join the lifestyle..

[RONJON]

Okay I have ready MANY threads lately about getting my girlfriend to workout..my girlfriend is getting out of shape..etc. soooo

What IS the formula for getting a person i.e. your girlfriend to really get into this fitness lifestyle???

This situation hits home for me personally because my girl just doesn't live anywhere close to this way. She works then goes home and watches movies eats or whatever..she is a fad dieter and will go to the gym for a week or so every once in a blue moon. Its just something that isn't important to her and the more I will push for her to get even just a little bit into it she backs off that much more.

And this isn't about accepting someone for who they are and all because I do. It is about myself being happier because I get to share more with her because fitness is a big part of my life. I would feel like she would understand me more and why I do certain things if she experienced them. Also she is sick alot for some reason and I think that being fit and eating right would keep her immune system better and just give her a better since of well-being.

So...lets settle this..What is the game plan fellas

RONJON

 

[Marshal-1]

Pick one who already lives the lifestyle.

 

[edge250]

depending on weather start taking walks together or bike rides or hiking, you guys spend quality time together, talk, its enjoyable for both. she gets inshape and your relationship gets stronger. and you get some cardio. dont try to just drag her in the gym, it will back fire.

 

[SABAGOY]

I am in a similar situation. My girlfriend has gotten better the past year or so we have been together but i still wish she would adopt a healthier lifestyle. The tough part is she has the body of a gym rat, everyone asks if we met at the gym but she hasnt been once in her life, so she isnt driven by the idea of being in "better shape". I just keep trying to get into her head that just because your skinny doesnt necessarily mean your healthy. I think its just the idea that fitness is so important important to me that i want it to be something we share.

She is very accepting however of my lifestyle and never once gives me crap about the way i eat and what time i wanna go to bed

Few suggestions might be cooking for her once in a while, my girl really likes the idea of us eating the same thing together. And like Edge said find things outside the gym to do like bike riding, walks, kayaking.

Not sure if this helps in anyway shape or form but wanted to let you know your not alone. And i will be watching this thread closely...hah

 

[tkav1980]

depending on weather start taking walks together or bike rides or hiking, you guys spend quality time together, talk, its enjoyable for both. she gets inshape and your relationship gets stronger. and you get some cardio. dont try to just drag her in the gym, it will back fire.

yeah you could do that or just pop her in the butt with 250 mg test e in her sleep for a few weeks! j/k.... what worked for me was not forcing her to do what i wanted her to do. instead when she said i want to lose weight or i want this part of my ass to look firmer i asked her if she ever belonged to a gym. then asked why she stopped going, what she liked about the last gym she used, what she didnt like. if you ask enough questions she will flat out tell you how you can help motivate her to exercise.

 

[7_Deadly_Sins]

Luckly my girlfriend was allready a gym person, and even more so because I am. Some days she wont go because she's tired or sick, but for the most part she's up for it.
Only bad thing is it takes her an hour to get ready.

Why dont you just ask her to take baby steps towords it, like run for 5-10 mins a day and such, maybe recommend some immune system supplements to her and ask her after a while if she feels better, than when she says yes, tell her it will only be enhanced with working out at the gym. (little does she know. lol)

 

[fsm]

Imo Tkav is exactly right. Ask the right questions and she will come up with the answer.

 

[WR66215]

In all honesty, I don't know if you can make someone enjoy the lifestyle we live, b/c it is exactly that....a lifestyle. Some people just don't have the energy, will power, interest, etc....to do what we do. I have tried to find other interests that my wife and I can share, to spend our time together. Luckily, she understands and respects what I do (for the most part!) and I use my time at the gym as time away, for myself. I know this doesn't solve your problem, but hopefully it helps in one way or the other.

 

[smootheavy]

Well I agree that it is easier to find someone who is already into that lifestyle, BUT if you are already with someone you love and want to see if you can motivate her to adopt a more active lifestyle, what I recommend is helping her to discover what she likes in terms of fitness activity

some people dont really know what they like...she may discover that she loves swimming (which is a great sport for fitness) or dancing (some of the best bodies I have ever seen)...the idea is to help her discover this and at the same time allow her to have ownership of it.

some people need a competition ie train weights and cardio to do a mini ironman or something like that.

 

[Doomed Messiah]

I had the same problem with my girl. Actually yesterday was her first day with a trainer, he worked her so hard she threw up once we left hahaha. Anyway she signed up for 3 days a week with the trainer and thats a start..the other thing I have been doing is going out hiking,biking,kayaking, walking around the beach, swimming..things to get her in shape but she sees it as spending quality time together (im sneaky). Another thing that got her to go to the gym was seeing me socialize with other girls...I guess she felt jealous and self-conscious and now wants to be there and make sure I dont flirt

 

[kandaandm]

I hired Heinz to help my fiance'. I've used Heinz in the past with very good results. My girl isn't in to working out and the such, however, she saw the results I got with Heinz and she wants to change her body in a smaller fashion.

 

[RONJON]

Well guys by listening to the ideas here..this will be my phase 1 strategy lol..Im gunna tell her that I understand that this is something that is important to ME and not her and that I apologize for trying to push her. I am gunna tell her that I can help her if she needs advice with her diet or training. And I also like the idea of her seeing me socialize with other girls in the gym...

Very informative posts guys

 

[kandaandm]

Oh and another thing I did was on days I don't do cardio at the gym I'll take walks with her in the evening for 30 to 45 minutes outside.

 

[HeavyHands]

Whatever you do, don't force it. Let her do what she wants to do. It took awhile for me to get my girlfriend into the gym with me. She wouldn't LIFT with me, but would only do cardio while I lifted. After a couple weeks of it, and after getting comfortable with the environment and what not, she finally decided ON HER OWN to begin doing some work with weights. So give her time and space to make the decision on her own while giving her some exposure to what it is we do. Best of luck to you, but remember: try not to force YOUR passion onto her.

 

[Diesel City]

Well guys by listening to the ideas here..this will be my phase 1 strategy lol..Im gunna tell her that I understand that this is something that is important to ME and not her and that I apologize for trying to push her. I am gunna tell her that I can help her if she needs advice with her diet or training. And I also like the idea of her seeing me socialize with other girls in the gym...

Very informative posts guys

I think it really depends on how serious you are with her. Are you going to marry this girl one day? If not, it may not be worth the time it will take. If you are serious about her, you could start by letting her know that you care about her and would like to have her around for a while, and not just around, but healthy.

I know its pretty gay, but from my experience women like to hear that you care about them, and you genuinely have their best interest and well being in mind.

 

[jdchaffin]

I think it really depends on how serious you are with her. Are you going to marry this girl one day? If not, it may not be worth the time it will take. If you are serious about her, you could start by letting her know that you care about her and would like to have her around for a while, and not just around, but healthy.

I know its pretty gay, but from my experience women like to hear that you care about them, and you genuinely have their best interest and well being in mind.

this is the approach I've been taking as well. We are pretty serious and I will on occation mention how good weight training is for bone density in women (with both child bearing and menapause in mind) and how more lean mass means more calories burned so she can enjoy her chocholate without as much guilt. The bone density always gets a positive response though.

 

[njpooldude]

having her see me flirt with girls in the gym would do nothing but start a fight if it was me.

better becarful with that one... u never know, she could do the same and it will back fire badly when she leaves with someone else..

i really liked the "spending time" together excuse.. walks together, biking those sorta things do seem to work well...

also ive been leaving womens fittness mags around the house ( i tell her they have good dinner and lunch ideas) and i find her flipping through them

 

[nosnmiveins]

also ive been leaving womens fittness mags around the house ( i tell her they have good dinner and lunch ideas) and i find her flipping through them

sneaky bastard!! i love it hahaha

my girl loooooooves the whole fitness lifestyle and begged me to show her how to use free weights and machines. all she ever used to do was cardio.

just yesturday i actually typed up a workout plan for her.