Not happy with how my life turned out

[kalika]

Keep your chin up bro and don't get down in a hole. Everyone goes through depression. 31, your young man and can do whatever you want. I know living at home is tough and prolly half your issues, but think it's only temporary.

 

[scrapper13]

Mistake number 1 is comparing yourself to other people. You are you and you should be thanking God everyday for that. Mistake number 2 is your outlook. If you look at it like it's a hole that you can't climb out of then it will be that. You're 31 and have the best parts of your life still in front of you. Decide what it is that will make you happy. Convince yourself that you WILL achieve whatever it is(may take time so be patient) and then get right to work. Good luck my man you sound like an intelligent guy don't be so hard on yourself.

 

[RalphMalph]

I agree with never comparing yourself to others, you don't know what people are going through themselves and that car may mean nothing relative to their struggles...besides which, you should only think about things YOU can control right now.

Good on you for helping family too...and for taking pride in doing your job well.

The past is gone now, just control the present and make your future all that it can be.

 

[QuietStorm]

It sounds like you are depressed. As coach said, there is help out there. If you cant afford it, there are programs to help. Dont be too proud to turn down a helping hand.
Caring for one parent can be taxing enough, but two? I cant imagine. You have strength, caring for them, overcoming your own illness.
You are focusing on the negatives in your life, you need to start looking at the good and positive. When we change our perspective, we change ourselves.
You may have made an incorrect choice for a career, but you can always go back and choose another.
If you are spending a lot of time with your parents, try to make time for yourself. Go for a walk, see a movie, bowling, go to the gym if you can..whatever it is. Just make a little time for you. And dont be afraid to ask for help.
I wish you the best.

 

[SugarFree]

30's not old buddy. If you want better in life than start working towards it! At 30 I finished night school and made a career switch to sofware development. I actually like my old jobs better but physically cant do that stuff anymore (injured on a deployment) and at least this pays a lot better. My wife at 40 has just finished getting her bacholers degree a few months ago.

I think it was said that the average person makes like 3 carrer changes in his life. Dont be afraid to continue to progess and improve youself whether it work, body building or just life in general.

 

[IronLift]

Sorry to hear that man. It sounds rough but if you are fed up with your situation enough you have the power to change it. All it takes is a little push in the right direction, and a little inspiration. And these are my beliefs of course, but no god or any other perceived deity is going to do this for you, put that faith in yourself. Find something that you really want to work towards, whether that be a new car, house, etc. and do what you have to do to make it happen. There are people out there in their 30s and 40s making career changes all the time. You have to put everything you have into it in order to make it happen. IT is a booming industry in the US, and it will be for quite a while to come. There is a greater need for certified technicians than ever before right now as company infrastructures change and upgrade on a continual basis, just something to keep in mind. Some of the certs are hard, but they really don't cost that much to take. Just an example of a path you could take. To me that's a better alternative than racking up a shit ton of debt going to college. Been there, done that, dropped out.

I'm about 5 years younger than you, but over the past couple of years my life took a dive. I lost a girl I really cared about, I wrecked my car after having an engine rebuild done to it, I lost my job, and I had to move to a different state and move in with my parents. I became an alcoholic and was unemployed and depressed off my ass. I used video games to escape. Then I decided enough was enough and quit the alcohol and started busting my ass in the gym again. I lost 30 pounds of fat and gained around 25 pounds of muscle in a 7 month period. I recently interviewed and got a job in the IT field that pays pretty damn well, and I don't even have a degree or certification. I just presented myself good in the interview and seemed knowledgeable.

Find something that you want to learn that you can support yourself with and go for it. I know things seem rough now but remember, your present does not determine your future. Find the drive you need and start kicking ass.

 

[alpha405]

Things get better with time and things could always be worse. Just try and keep a positive attitude.

 

[360]

I've been around these boards since around 08, just never been my thing to post much but I made an account just to get some stuff off my chest and maybe get a few words of wisdom from anyone who's been through similar.

I'm 31. I live with my family and have a low-end job making minimum wage. I'm also in debt.... it's under 15k, but for me it's a mountain.

I ended up in this situation due to, I guess just a string of bad luck.....an undisclosed illness put me in debt after having many problems with insurance, was disabled for some time, took care of two ill parents as best as I could. Got a bachelors degree but in a useless art field (note: i have zero interest in art, I was pushed to go to college but realistically I wasn't ready to pick a career path, so I chose at random).

I feel blessed because at least I have a place to stay... I don't really own much but I have a cheap little computer (gets the job done), a cheap car (ditto) and a gym membership.

I'm still sick, although manageable, but can't really take on a high executive career (not do I meet the requirements) so I feel like I'll just be stuck doing cheap minimum wage labor for a while.

I'm just rambling but honestly I'm just fed up. I see people come in the shop where I work, many younger than me, smiling and seemingly carefree, in their nice cars, talking about their new house etc. and this just tears me up.... when I was 15 that's where I thought I would be but years and years go by and nothing. There's not much I'm all that passionate about.... I'd pursue bodybuilding if a good portion of me hadn't been burned and had severe scarring all over the place. I can barely afford to get by, while paying off my debt and caring for my ill parents, much less live on my own.

Feel free to put me in my place, am I just whining too much? I feel like I am, but another part of me feels like I got royally screwed in life.

Never compare yourself to other people. Most people with fancy material crap either lease it or have huge debt. Keep things simple and take one day at a time. Make the best of each day by enjoying your workout, diet, and family.

I am a doctor. I make close to $400,000/year and have over $2M in the bank. I drive a regular car ($18,000) and live in my wife's townhouse ($80,000). I give my wife $2,000/month for food and bills. I have no credit card and no monthly bills. I own two pairs of shorts, one pair of jeans, and three t-shirts. I do the same things everyday at the same time and I am completely happy with my simple life. I didn't start medical school until I was 28 years old. You are never too old to go back to school. Live simple and be carefree, this will make you happy.

 

[OuchThatHurts]

Trust me, at 31, your life hasn't "turned out" at all. You could easily start fresh with an entirely new life and 15k is far from insurmountable. You just sound a little down. Hormones can affect your mood (I just felt the need to point that out).

We all have our slumps. You just have to reevaluate your life and rebuild one small piece at a time.

Or whatever you have to do.