Anyone here become a father AFTER turning 40?

[taz]

I turn 40 this year and I really really want another child. Im married so the first part of the equation is no problem. And she wants another one, so the 2nd part of the equation is worked out. But I have heard that there is a high risk after 40 with men (my wife is only 38 though she is high risk also).

Any of you guys actually become a father (or become one again) after turning 40? If so, how old were you? I am figuring we probably would have to wait at least a year, if not maybe 2, while I get my business better established. I am swamped at work as I just opened a gym 2 years ago and we are in one of the most densely competitive markets on the East Coast. So i work literally 7 days a week and generally 14hr days.

I know the stress would make it hard to even get pregnant at this point as well.

Im just wondering what your experiences were and what information you guys (and girls) may have?

THX

 

[ClaytonBigsby]

HELLLLLLL NOOOOOOOOO! Do you understand the hit in retirement savings that is going to cost you!!! Youre going to be 65 pumpin some kid thru college!

and great time for a kid...working your ass off 7 days/14 hours....

 

[Pharm_Fed]

My cousin and his wife had kids in their 40's. Turned out to be twins. Every time I see him he seems on the threshold of exhaustion and on the brink of a meltdown. They are 6 now and he's in his mid-late 40's so they have all the energy in the world....and he has none. And there's two of them. It seems really hard. I would personally never have kids that late.

 

[Ghost..]

My dad remarried 7 years ago and had another son 2 years later. He was 50 at the time. 55 now. His wife is only 38 though and can def keep up better than he can

 

[NTL]

I had my second one at 39 and don't reget it a bit.I have a 18 year old also.It is much easier with the second one and I easily keep up with her.

 

[IronManRep]

Seems like this is the type of question that can only be truly answered by you and your wife. Personally I don't believe 40 is that old, but again that can only be determined by you and your current situation. My parents had me when they were both 42 yrs old and the only difference I noticed was they were a lot stricter than the rest of my friends parents. Not fun when trying to stay out late on the weekends, or wanting to see a PG-13 movie

 

[D2]

I don't see any problem, in fact having children this age makes u wana keep fit to cater to their needs

 

[tattoo449]

I had a little boy at 40. He's 7 now. Damn I'm old. Lol. But it's cool bro. I wouldn't change it. I also have a 23yr old daughter from a previous marriage. When the 3 of us are together people think I'm the grandfather or a dirty old man. It's kind of funny. My current wife , the mother of the boy is 10 yrs younger than me. When we were planning this child I didn't want to wait too much past 40. Forty is still young enough where you can still enjoy a retirement in late 50 or early 60 's. Too much longer than that is pushing it. IMHO. I have a buddy who's 52 with twin girls that are 2. Now I'm glad thats not me. Good luck with whatever you choose bro.

 

[Ashop]

Myself no,,,I did have parents who had me at older age,,middle forties.

 

[fasttimes]

I love it, I've got a 3 year old and a 6 year old, I'm 49 in 3 weeks, i definitely wasn't mature enough as a 20 something to have kids. I didn't have the job i have now to support them or pay for future University back then, I've worked my way to 100k$ a year so i can support any activities they want, when I was a kid all i was into was the bars and my 79 Camaro, lol

 

[bulking1]

I had my last at thrity six and my wife was thirity eight and no regrets. Do it if you and wife want it to happen . My wife and I wish we went for three but she had her tubes tide and we regret it to this day. Do IT.

 

[Ghost..]

My dad remarried 7 years ago and had another son 2 years later. He was 50 at the time. 55 now. His wife is only 38 though and can def keep up better than he can

This is me holding my two daughters, with my little brother to my immediate left and my son beside him. Everywhere we go people think I'm the father of em all, then I say "nope, this is their uncle." Always get a funny look!!**broken link removed**

 

[AshopRep]

The older you are, the better parent you'll be, I think.

 

[Gravel]

I have a 20 year old, 18 year old and a 9 year old; I am 50 and my wife is 48. My 9 year old is a blessing and I can't imagine life without him; if it wasn't for him I am sure I wouldn't be riding a bike, swimming, jumping on a trampoline or playing basketball.....I would probably just be a boring old bodybuilder...haha.

 

[anarchocapitalist]

I'm 35 and the wife is having our third child.
I currently have two boys.
I find it exhausting as fuck but now its just a lifestyle.
My second child cries constantly.
But in the end, as every parent knows, there isn't anything worth more than kids.

 

[biffnbash]

43 and my first kid on the way...glad we waited- lived and played as much as we did. We are content, healthy and have successful....now it's time for us to settle down and enjoy parenthood.

 

[E.J.]

Something you and ur wife should consider is the risk of having a child with a disability. Having children later in life does put them at higher risk for certain types of disorders. Not really fair to the child. There are things worse than being 60 and having a kid graduate high school, like being 60 and having a disabled child who is dependent on ur care for the rest of your life.

 

[dnab87]

If you both want a kid man, just do it. Youll make the sacrafices you need in order to be happier and enjoy life. If that means hiring another employee so you get time off, taking a day off from the gym, ect.

Do what makes you happy.

 

[taz]

Something you and ur wife should consider is the risk of having a child with a disability. Having children later in life does put them at higher risk for certain types of disorders. Not really fair to the child. There are things worse than being 60 and having a kid graduate high school, like being 60 and having a disabled child who is dependent on ur care for the rest of your life.

Im sorry guys, I should have explained my post better. This is exactly what I was most concerned about. Disability, problems with the child, anything of that nature. Thanks, this was my fear and that is why I wanted to see others experiences and what their Dr's may have warned them about, etc.

All other issues are solid. My wife and I both desperately want another child. But I am more cautious about the potential downsides of it.When it comes to playing with the kids or money those are non-issues. I own a very successful gym as well as 2 websites that have very strong customer bases. We are preparing for their relaunch under our new parent company which is the other reason I am working nonstop. I am building the sites myself. Plus I have always made very good money in the stock market and am avidly investing (how many of you can say they you have owned Apple since it was $80 bucks??? lol)

My worries are that due to my age/lifestyle that I am unfairly risking my potential child. I have 3 kids now. Nothing in this world means as much to me as my kids. I have more than enough energy and often I tire them out (they are 7, 10, and 11). I am a personal trainer and have adjusted my training style to adapt to my lifestyle as well as a competitive grappler and Muay Thai fighter/coach.

 

[eaglecall]

Im 38, divorced, no kids, and lost all hope. I would love to have a family but theres no good woman out there. Simple as that. The few good ones left are taken by assholes.