Getting over an X boyfriend/girlfriend

[massnup]

How many people in here are having problems getting over and X girlfriend or boyfriend? What has helped you get over this person or what are you doing to get over this person? What has helped you the most about getting over this person and how did you move on and get over it?

 

[Nssca]

I think the biggest hurdle in letting go of an ex is, if you see them often or talk to them after you two split up.
Obviously if you have kids together then there is no way out of seeing them from time to time. But if you can at all help it Dont see them.

Do what ever it takes to go out of your way not to see them and dont talk or call them.
Its hard at times but over time those feelings will go away more and more. Having some one else new you care about is also one of the best ways to keep your mind off your ex. Avoid places you two used to go together ..at lest till your able to handle it better. avoid doing things only you and your ex did together...except sex...LOL some people change their phone numbers, buy a diff car even move out of the area and start over new...but its all about what you can afford or able to do. If you work together then ask to boss to transfer you to a diff dept or area so you wont "run into" your ex so often...what ever it takes...do it.
So to sum it up avoid them at all costs and find someone new.

My motto is... once you break up no matter who is at fault...NEVER EVER get back together with that person. What ever caused the problem,it couldn't be worked out the first time so why would it work out this time?

 

[triathloncoach]

Hmm

I you were dumped it's actually a lot easier. You have no choice but to deal with the pain and know over time you will EVENTUALLY feel better.

I you dumped them just keep reminding yourself why you ended it. As Rooster said, those reasons don't usually go away or just resolve themselves.

Bottom line, it hurts, you are not in a unique situation, as much as we all want to think our relationship was so out of the ordinary. Just take it day by day and not to be glib, just try to tough it out. There is no magic bullet.

Best wishes.

PS - Unless it's the woman in your Avatar - then you really are in a bad place to lose that.

 

[optgrowth]

Ok, some of you may jump on me about this, but I'm going to say it:

Find someone and sleep with them. If you are able to have sex with someone and not have emotions involved, it helps. At least it helped me in the past. Rebound sex or whatever you choose to call it. I think it will help you forget the ex, give you the confindence you need to stay strong and move on.

I know some of you guys aren't as sick and twisted in the head as me, but maybe some of the younger guys can chime in on my response and agree

 

[hawkmoon]

My motto is... once you break up no matter who is at fault...NEVER EVER get back together with that person. What ever caused the problem,it couldn't be worked out the first time so why would it work out this time?

This is so true. The temptation is always there to fall back to old patterns and forget what caused the problems in the first place. Our brains are wired to seek pleasure and ignore the dangers.

I agree with avoiding the person themselves and places/things that remind of them.

 

[EVERLAST]

yeah right, but

Ok good advice, but sometimes the triggers are EVERYWHERE.
Someone spends part of their life with you
and during that time memories get stored.

Memories you dont forget but sublimate.
Later on maybe you can remember them and the good times.

But for a while...you have to be the thought police and not allow the thoughts/memories to dominate your thinking.

This is tough!
many just can't do it...
seek out a good counselor,
or Behavioral Therapist, if this sounds like you...

E

 

[klowndog]

Going through it right now, bro, however, my ex is now with a wannabe pig who works in a prison. I called her up last Thursday to try and talk and he answers and is like "COme over here now and I'll put a bullet in your head", among other bullshit, and man, that guy really needs to be carrying a gun around and be in public authority huh?

Anyway, I felt crushed, "squish like grape" as Miyagi would say. But as Opt said, I got me some fresh ass this weekend and I feel liek a new man already. I look at it as an opportunity to better ME, instead of wasting all the time and money I wasted on HER for the last 2 years.

I am using it as an opportunity to get my place fixed up, start a new heavy bulking cycle, and get my finances straightened out. It hurts like no other pan though, I know, it just takes time, but I think we all have good points here. I was actually searching for this exact thread last Thursday and Friday because I felt like hammered dogshit. I was happy to see someone made this thread (sadly misery loves company). Just please don't go blow all your money in the bars/titty bars for the first few months as I did.