Blown off on my birthday.. Am I too selfish..

bigguns078 · Apr 11, 2009

Today is my birthday.. Last weekend i had the usual b-day celebration at a bar.. A bunch of people were invited.. Only 3 people came out.. My girlfriend and my buddy and his girlfriend.. It wasn't a big deal because i had alot of people come out last year.. So i really didn't want a big night out this time around. Just my close friends and that would be fine.. Tonight i was supposed to go out with the rest of my supposed "close friends", but they all can't come.. Im not a big "going out" person as i used to be.. I used to go out all the time in my twenties.. When the weekend rolls around.. It seems everyone wants to go out on the town and hit up a bar..

Over the last several years, I have been more dedicated to the bodybuilding lifestyle and im not concerned with boozing my weekends away. Im more concerned about my health and maintaining my physique. As a bodybuilder, I tend to be a bit selfish (have to eat this, have to prepare my meals, don't want to drink all the time).

I also have been staying out of the bars/clubs more.. So I'll pass up on a night of boozing and do something else more low key.. I've tried the going to a bar and not drinking... It just doesn't work.. For me.. You actually get more tired, standing around drinking water, than if i put down some booze.. Especially if its during a dieting phase.. So i tend to not go out with my group of friends as much.. But i always go out for special occasions for my close friends (birthdays, weddings, etc.)

Im just wondering if other people around here feel their bodybuilding lifestyle tends to isolate them from social gatherings and friendships.. I wonder if my lack of bar attendance over the past year was the result of no-one being around for my b-day?

SpudToStud · Apr 12, 2009

hey bro, i was in the same boat as you for the most part. I used to go out drinking alot and finally put it to a stop and been back to focusing on me and what i need as far as bb goes. I have found that its them, they are going out everynight getting waisted, forgetting about who they were even with that night let alone, weeks, months and years later. So for them to be a no show should not be a suprise. I get this too when im trying to go hang out on an off day or recovery week and i cant find anyone. sometimes it gets me down but then i look at the big picture, stuff my face, and get a good sober night of sleep so i try not to sweat it.

hope this helps

wostok · Apr 12, 2009

Same thing happened to me when i stopped drinking.
I think its kinda funny but at the same time a little depressing that so much of my relationships with people were based on alcohol.

Its interesting, some people who drink/party much get sooo annoyed if you say you dont drink. They want to drag you into their false sense of happiness or something. Its like if you are sober you could burst their bubble of false happy feelings and remind them of the real world. People drink to forget, if you dont drink with them you remind them of their obligations and problems in the real world, and they dont want to think of those things, they just want to feel good.

Iceman1800 · Apr 12, 2009

Maybe your not as much fun since ya quit drinking

But seriously, people change and friends change as hobbies and interests/lifestyles change. I wouldn't sweat it

Designbuilt · Apr 13, 2009

I just finished watching the Movie Yes Man, this scenerio kind of reminds me of that.

boney · Apr 13, 2009

same

I feel like lots has change cause my friends get wasted every night an im staying sober to wake up early an go to the gym.I used to love going out to the bar an get wasted but i feel like im getting so much more outta life now.I drank really hard for 2 year an it feels like i lost 2 years of my life cause of getting wasted day in an day out.I have a few true friend that i can count on that dosnt require me to get wasted just to hang out.

keep ur head up,its worth it in the long run
boney

Pekkerwood · Apr 13, 2009

Hard:

It definately can be because of your change in lifestyle. Some of it may be economic nowadays as well. I do think the older you get with the exceptions of the "big" ones, birthdays just aren't that "special" any longer.

I have a few folks I used to see much more often when I would "party" with them more regularly. When I quit the behavior we had less social outlets in common than we once did, and drifted more apart. It happens.