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I'm the biggest dweeb in the world, but determined to change

Campeon

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Aug 2, 2003
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Here's my story. I'm 47 y.o. and determined to get out of isolation. I'm heterosexual and proud of it. i have been isolated most of my life convinced women never have sex. I suspect i have schizoid/schizotypal personality disorder but i have never been diagnosed.
And because of this mostly lifelong isolation and involuntary celibacy i've been off and on anti-depressant medication since 1999.

However, with relationships and being a man I'm the worst of the worst.

Let me disclose some really personal stuff here.

I have been unable to attract any quality women my entire life.
I went all the way in to my 30's without a hug or a kiss from a woman.
Currently, i have no friends except for a few people i talk to once a year.

I am currently doing salsa dancing lessons. I have also been studying the art of pickup and seduction on youtube from RSD and others.
I feel uneasy in social situations and can't approach anyone in a bar or nightclub due to being uneasy.

I have a lot of negative self thoughts and chronically low self-esteem. I don't know how to get out of this...

campeon del mundo
Scott
 

pesty4077

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Scott, I suggest professional guidance. You need a qualified individual to guide you and not an internet. Nothing to be ashamed, lots of us have seek help one time or another. I think you might be possibly going in a state of depression and that is not a good thing. You also have deep issues if it has been like this all your life. I wish you the best but please reach out to a qualified individual.
 

tripleOT

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Totally agree with pesty. Life is too damn short to go through it unsatisfied. Nothing wrong with seeking professional help.
 

j4ever

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Scott, I suggest professional guidance. You need a qualified individual to guide you and not an internet. Nothing to be ashamed, lots of us have seek help one time or another. I think you might be possibly going in a state of depression and that is not a good thing. You also have deep issues if it has been like this all your life. I wish you the best but please reach out to a qualified individual.
damn straight, lots if not most of us have needed help for one thing or another at some point in our life, no shame in it brotha, get help!
 

landmarkchem.linda

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Just like you need to find a doc and get some medicine when getting sick, hope you can find professional guide which can help you out of this. Also glad to see you have started to change, wish you can become a better yourself, find people you love and not alone.
 

Campeon

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psychs

I've had various psychologists in the past and i thought they were useless.

Maybe i need to find one who specializes in my problem?

Yes my isolation was quite severe. i didn't realize i was isolated. I have made BIG improvements since then.

I am currently taking a welbutrin/lexapro combination. I feel better but i dont really need anti-depressants.

I am doing Salsa dancing and using this as therapy to have fun.

Another thing is I probably intimidate women and in the past i remember some women actively avoided me. I don't understand why they would do this.


scott
 

G.I.Bro

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I'll just leave this here. Many of our finest members have Aspergers. Lol. Welcome home! tapatalk_1479349873642.jpeg
 
Last edited:

Campeon

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help

I have been in a gym since 1986. So maybe i am retarded LOL ...


Anyways besides spending $100 per hour for a psych what advice do you guys have for me? Any exercises i can do?


scott
 

2thmaker

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I have been in a gym since 1986. So maybe i am retarded LOL ...


Anyways besides spending $100 per hour for a psych what advice do you guys have for me? Any exercises i can do?


scott
My quick answer is no. Based on what you've posted you really should be talking to a professional therapist not asking for help on this forum.
 

tenny

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craigslist....

casual encounters....

:lightbulb:
 

bg091593

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Just talk to them. Ask them out. Just plain be nice to them. Don't be afraid to fail. If I had a nickel every time I got shut down I'd be loaded.
 

Dizzle82

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I am currently taking a welbutrin/lexapro combination. I feel better but i dont really need anti-depressants.

I am doing Salsa dancing and using this as therapy to have fun.
scott
Like many others have stated talk to a professional & find one you like.

Im no DR. But anti-depressants arn't a 1 type fits all. in fact some actually add to the problem. welbutrin especially. seen it with many friends and family.

The salsa thing is a great idea! maybe look into other hobbies and classes that interest you with a group setting. being around people with similar interests gives you something to talk/bond about and help you feel more at ease.. you can google local group activities in your area. meetup.com is a good one. its free and there is a lot of diff stuff on there everything from hiking, photography, music food etc..
 

jerrylee253

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Get a cute little ugly dog and hit up your local dog park after smokin a lil weed ... could go wrong ..
Could go great .. only one way to find out lmao.. if i were to ever offer advice i would tell someone to not care so much and let your life steer itsself.. just dont be the guy with the wolf that tries to eat the other dogs .. apparently a huge turn off lol
 

tenny

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can we just see a pic......???

this could possibly clear all this up......

:cool:
 

bad rad

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Mar 26, 2017
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I didn't read all the responses but a couple of things jumped out at me.

1- A negative attitude will guarantee a negative life. Smiling causes changes in brain chemistry that will increase happiness.

2- Lifelong feelings of inadequecy scream low test or anxiety from something else. Low 300's is in range for test but still a horrible number.

3- Do you have Asperger's or similar? Some of your statements remind me of a person on the spectrum.

One thing I learned a long time ago is you can't be a good partner if you're still working on your own issues. Once you find your balance you'll find somebody when you aren't looking.

I'd also try meditation.
 
Last edited:

Campeon

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I didn't read all the responses but a couple of things jumped out at me.

1- A negative attitude will guarantee a negative life. Smiling causes changes in brain chemistry that will increase happiness.

2- Lifelong feelings of inadequecy scream low test or anxiety from something else. Low 300's is in range for test but still a horrible number.

3- Do you have Asperger's or similar? Some of your statements remind me of a person on the spectrum.

One thing I learned a long time ago is you can't be a good partner if you're still working on your own issues. Once you find your balance you'll find somebody when you aren't looking.

I'd also try meditation.
That is great advice. Very well stated.
My blood work showed testosterone to be in the low 300's. Maybe that is a problem.

scott
 

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