JETHRO'S GYM ADVENTURES.

[JETHRO TULL]

Some of you guys and gals are familiar with my posts and know that I teach and have the summer off each year. Well, I had a good time for the most part and got a good tan! But....I did make it to the gym in town some this summer to train one of my former clients. She's a mom with a couple kids and she likes working out. The gym where she lives is small but new with great hammerstrength/lifefitness equipment. The owner is a good guy and lets me train there for free. So that's pretty cool! However....the only time my client can train is a 5:00 am. This wouldn't be an issue other than the fact that there is a group of about five guys who are there at the same time lifting.

The group of guys make quite a bit of noise. They holler, squeal, and groan as they pursue physical perfection. Again, I wouldn't have a problem if even one was squatting, deadlifting, etc....but the psuedo-orgasmic howls escape [no shit, I am not kidding] while doing crunches, cable tricep pushdowns, curls...I've only seen them do deads a couple times and that's just hilarious to watch. You'd think some sort of new personal records were being attempted. But....NOOOOOO. My client even told me..."I didn't make that much noise when I was in labor, giving birth to my two children." I hope you get the picture!

I recognized the fact that there were probably some sensitive egos in the gym..THEIR GYM... so the whole time I was helping my client I'd wear sweatshirts, even my big-assed Levi jacket. At one point one of the 'crew' asked me why I was wearing the jacket...was I cold? I responded that I was a little out of shape, sorta fat, and that I was embarrassed to show much skin. The response? "Well, dude, cardio, cardio, cardio, at least 4x per week"....Keep in mind Ive never been as fat as the fella who gave me that advice. The largest of the 'crew' is 220lbs. I was 285lbs and not fat when he gave me this free advice. I guess I must have looked like I needed his help...I don't know! lol...

My next bit of help came after a couple weeks after the crew had gotten used to my presence in the morning and had grudgingly accepted me. I decided to do some back and triceps after my client got finished...To get my own workout done so I could hit the river the rest of the day. MISTAKE!

I started doing some cable rows and alternating those with lying tricep extensions..back and forth to save time. I had a large ez-bar..the thirtyfive pound one and the 45lbs plates on each side. I was just pumping that day because my elbows had been a little sore...I come back from the row station and one of the guys says...."hey, Joe [The owner/guru] lets get JETHRO set up on that exercise with a decline bench. The guy then went on to explain ..."it's the best way to get the triceps". I then smiled and asked with complete innocence...."oh, does that make the exercise easier?" Keep in mind, my biceps aren't that great...but my triceps arent bad and much bigger than any of these jokers have. I always do everything I can to be completely humble and kind to others.....so I didn't say anything. I did keep thinking though....shit, now that I have the secret to huge arms, I'd better kill these fellas or otherwise everyone will be packing 21 inch guns! To think, people are lifting everywhere around the world...yet the secret is here in a small town gym in Montana...amazing!

 

[rAJJIN]

JT! Good to see you back around Big fella.
Hope youve had a good summer, Dang sure went by fast hasnt it.

Thats A great story..I can picture it all now in my head, lol
Ive seen the same "crew I think at every Gym here in missouri
(or should I say fitness center) Dont you love it when you get that free
Unwanted advice
I have to wonder though did you ever peel a few layers and show them what
real muscle looks like :ort-smi

 

[Larry Bowie]

 

[Got Juice]

thats funny JETHRO and i think we can all relate...

i hate it though, yesterday this guy, completely out of shape asks to work in with me.. im about as laid back and as friendly as they get so of course i said now prob.. i helped him load his weights etc... then he starts to tell me not to worry about how much i lift, its all about how you look.. and he's on the body for life, he works out 2 hours per day... i just acted interested and left the gym because he was the type that would continue to talk to me even after we were done sharing the machine and i was just tired of listening to him.. it made me feel like i looked like shit!! lol

 

[manboy270]

"free advice"

 

[Ashop]

Some of you guys and gals are familiar with my posts and know that I teach and have the summer off each year. Well, I had a good time for the most part and got a good tan! But....I did make it to the gym in town some this summer to train one of my former clients. She's a mom with a couple kids and she likes working out. The gym where she lives is small but new with great hammerstrength/lifefitness equipment. The owner is a good guy and lets me train there for free. So that's pretty cool! However....the only time my client can train is a 5:00 am. This wouldn't be an issue other than the fact that there is a group of about five guys who are there at the same time lifting.

The group of guys make quite a bit of noise. They holler, squeal, and groan as they pursue physical perfection. Again, I wouldn't have a problem if even one was squatting, deadlifting, etc....but the psuedo-orgasmic howls escape [no shit, I am not kidding] while doing crunches, cable tricep pushdowns, curls...I've only seen them do deads a couple times and that's just hilarious to watch. You'd think some sort of new personal records were being attempted. But....NOOOOOO. My client even told me..."I didn't make that much noise when I was in labor, giving birth to my two children." I hope you get the picture!

I recognized the fact that there were probably some sensitive egos in the gym..THEIR GYM... so the whole time I was helping my client I'd wear sweatshirts, even my big-assed Levi jacket. At one point one of the 'crew' asked me why I was wearing the jacket...was I cold? I responded that I was a little out of shape, sorta fat, and that I was embarrassed to show much skin. The response? "Well, dude, cardio, cardio, cardio, at least 4x per week"....Keep in mind Ive never been as fat as the fella who gave me that advice. The largest of the 'crew' is 220lbs. I was 285lbs and not fat when he gave me this free advice. I guess I must have looked like I needed his help...I don't know! lol...

My next bit of help came after a couple weeks after the crew had gotten used to my presence in the morning and had grudgingly accepted me. I decided to do some back and triceps after my client got finished...To get my own workout done so I could hit the river the rest of the day. MISTAKE!

I started doing some cable rows and alternating those with lying tricep extensions..back and forth to save time. I had a large ez-bar..the thirtyfive pound one and the 45lbs plates on each side. I was just pumping that day because my elbows had been a little sore...I come back from the row station and one of the guys says...."hey, Joe [The owner/guru] lets get JETHRO set up on that exercise with a decline bench. The guy then went on to explain ..."it's the best way to get the triceps". I then smiled and asked with complete innocence...."oh, does that make the exercise easier?" Keep in mind, my biceps aren't that great...but my triceps arent bad and much bigger than any of these jokers have. I always do everything I can to be completely humble and kind to others.....so I didn't say anything. I did keep thinking though....shit, now that I have the secret to huge arms, I'd better kill these fellas or otherwise everyone will be packing 21 inch guns! To think, people are lifting everywhere around the world...yet the secret is here in a small town gym in Montana...amazing!

Good story. I think EVERY gym has those same people.

 

[JustWannaBeHuge]

jeeze JT, i was just trying to help you get guns as big as mine, you don't have to say you're gonna kill me and all my boys lol.

JW

 

[littlemack]

I hope to never have the pleasure of this experience.... Great story!
I just wear headphones and run around the gym in a manic state that confuses everyone. ha.

 

[wedge]

You must Be one cool dude JETHRO

How do keep calm around smuckies like that? After a month of that I would have had words. Man, I joined a new gym and had simular situation but they would laugh and carry on and act like tough shit for everyone. I finally just went over and laid into em. I have always bitten my lip with this kina BS but that day I snapped, I felt bad after it was over with cause I felt like I lowered myself to their level but the next day I came in several people approached me and said they were over due for a ass chewing. 2 months have passed and they decided to workout in the a.m.

 

[edge250]

my gym adventure today.......some good looking blonde was using the hammer chest press which is directly across from the leg press where i proceeded to fart from the pressure everytime i pushed the weight back up. i am sooooo cool

 

[HELLA SWOLE]

my gym adventure today.......some good looking blonde was using the hammer chest press which is directly across from the leg press where i proceeded to fart from the pressure everytime i pushed the weight back up. i am sooooo cool

LMAO!! There is no holding back a fart that needs to come out when on the leg press sled...you cant control it ever!!

 

[b4n30n3]

my gym adventure today.......some good looking blonde was using the hammer chest press which is directly across from the leg press where i proceeded to fart from the pressure everytime i pushed the weight back up. i am sooooo cool

Haha yea I fart every time I deadlift.

 

[edge250]

you know you are hardcore when you continue with the set repping out 12 reps intermitted with 12 loud fast air biscuits despite the dismay of attractive females around you

 

[Larry Bowie]

Air biscuits??? hahahahaha.

 

[JETHRO TULL]

You guys rule!

Those responses cracked me up....I forgot the rest of the story in my earlier post. Makes me glad I have good computer access once again. I missed you guys!

Here is the rest of the story...
After a while the 'crew' decided I was cool enough to lift with them. One day the biggest screamer of the group...good abs..pretty lean..probably 6feet tall 190lbs.. told me I should join the morning 'boot camp'. Yes....boot camp...sounds pretty rugged doesn't it? lol...

I told him that I really appreciated it but that I just mainly lifted for fun and was used to training in the living room all winter with my girlfriend. His response was a real killer...."Well,we lift pretty heavy and we are hardcore, it's not for everybody". He followed that up with the fact he could use the 85lbs dumbells on the flat bench for reps. Now normally I would have congratulated the guy....had he not just informed me how heavily he trained, not to mention how 'hardcore' he was. The gal I was working with trained as hard as any of those guys did!

 

[Eatbig2getbig]

you know you are hardcore when you continue with the set repping out 12 reps intermitted with 12 loud fast air biscuits despite the dismay of attractive females around you

LMFAO, Thata boy you sick bastard..I would never do that, shame on you!!

 

[xcelbeyond]

Glad you're back JT

Isn't it always the guy with the smaller arms telling you how to work your arms, or the guy with the smaller chest telling how to bench, etc

I really enjoy the guys that are "much" smaller than you, tell you "I used to be as big as you" or "My arms used to be that big."

A guy I used to workout with (big guy like JT) told me if you're not belching or farting, you're not working out hard enough

 

[homonunculus]

Jethro, man, you've got them set up for a really fun day, you know that?... LOL

Maybe, next time you're there, ask if you can join in when they're doing dumbbell presses.

"Hey, guys, I don't have those over at the house. Can I join in?..."

"Sure, Buddy, but we're goin' HEAVY - you're gonna have to hang with the BIG BOYS!!!"

<Sheepish> "OK, man, I'll give it a whirl!"

Then, just hop in there and follow along. Be really wobbly with the first couple sets... (Like you've never done DB presses before... LOL)

Then, hang with 'em as they go up in weight. If they do ten reps with the 60's, do 9 reps, stop and look up and ask if you were supposed to do ten, then do the last rep.

After the big dog gets to the 85's, duplicate his set and thank them for letting you work in... As they're nodding their heads and grumbling, look over at the rack at the biggest DB's they have (prob. 120's maybe?...). Say,

"Hey - those look fun! I'm gonna try them out!"

Then proceed to bang out a nice easy set of 10, rack 'em, check your watch and say, "Shit, guys - gotta date with my girl for breakfast. Thanks again!!!"



-Randy

 

[Ring Steel]

Good to see ya posting again JT!

Have you ever had a fat-ass try to tell you how to do cardio... while you're on the treadmill? That's when I started taking my headphones with me.

 

[HELLA SWOLE]

Those responses cracked me up....I forgot the rest of the story in my earlier post. Makes me glad I have good computer access once again. I missed you guys!

Here is the rest of the story...
After a while the 'crew' decided I was cool enough to lift with them. One day the biggest screamer of the group...good abs..pretty lean..probably 6feet tall 190lbs.. told me I should join the morning 'boot camp'. Yes....boot camp...sounds pretty rugged doesn't it? lol...

I told him that I really appreciated it but that I just mainly lifted for fun and was used to training in the living room all winter with my girlfriend. His response was a real killer...."Well,we lift pretty heavy and we are hardcore, it's not for everybody". He followed that up with the fact he could use the 85lbs dumbells on the flat bench for reps. Now normally I would have congratulated the guy....had he not just informed me how heavily he trained, not to mention how 'hardcore' he was. The gal I was working with trained as hard as any of those guys did!

LMAO!! PLLLLEEEAASSSEEEE Tell me that you plan on training in a tank top with them one day and going heavy on your lifts for them to see...PLEASE!! I would love to hear their response!!