My dad is in ICU

[buffbabeca]

its ok to be angry..... believe me i went through the roller coaster of emotions over and over again......

i know all too well wishing that the pain would end and not wishing my mom would pass but that there was something ANYTHING i could do to make it stop....


i am sooooooooooooooo sorry

 

[JETHRO TULL]

MAN, YOUR FEELINGS ARE PERFECTLY VALID.

What really sucks about this .lets say they can cut the tumor down.How long will that last.That is just gonna prolong his pain let him live longer so he can hurt more!what the hell.i had a thought today and i feel like i am gonna go to hell for it.IT was that they just leave him alone.I felt like i wished he would die.No fucking machine no moning.I dont want him to try to say sorry for my past eithier and i think he would try.I dont understand this hole thing.If what does not kill you makes you stronger.I would rather stay weak.I really dont need any more life lessons.Or how about game over i did learn alot from my life this far so can what ever power is up stairs can you stop fucking with me and the pepole i care for.I now i asked for your prayes so yelling in that derection is prod not a good idea.I just see it like a pation if enough pepole sign it the higher ups have to listen.Sorry i guess this is all just some anger comeing to the surface.Thank you all again

SOMETIMES A SWIFT PASSING IS THE MOST MERCIFUL THING THAT YOU CAN HOPE FOR. I AM WITH YOU IN THAT REGARD. THOSE ARE HONEST FEELINGS AND PROBABLY ARE WHAT YOU WOULD WISH FOR YOURSELF IF YOU WERE IN YOUR DAD'S POSTITION. IT'S OKAY TO BE PISSED OFF AND SAD, TONKA.

I'VE SHED MY SHARE OF TEARS IN SIMILAR SITUATIONS.

 

[Benny_Da_bull]

Now is the time to let all the past end. This is your final chance to tell your dad how much you love him. This way he will be at peace. I never got that chance and have always regreted this. Go and make peace with him. I mean truely forgive him and you too will find peace. I pray that when his time comes he goes quietly in the night. No pain, no suffering and no regrets.
God Bless!

OF is right, The last thing you want to do is wish you would have said this or that. Let there be nothing unsaid, no doubts no regrets. You will both be in my prayers.
Hey God can pull him threw if it's his will.

 

[oldfella]

Tonka, this is normal to feel the way you do. You are correct with your wishes. Your father's time has come bro, unfortunately the medical people do not see it this way. They think there is some sort of duty to keep a dying old man alive here. I, like you do not understand it. I also like you wish that your father just slips away! Pain and suffering is not living!! Your anger is ok, vent it out and be at peace bro. You can not keep your anger bottled up inside. This is where this community is like no other. Look around here, so many of us have been through so much, this is why we understand. Let it all out. Go and say what you want/need to. He will hear you and be eternally greatful that you did. So will you! Go with God bro and get peace back inyour life!! God Bless your father and the rest of your family.

 

[Ashop]

My dad may not have much time left i just left the hospital and my dad is in ICU can you guys keep him in yours prayes.Any help he can get would help!The tumors are spearding so fast this one came from no where its in his throat and he cant breath with out a machine.Thanks guys see yea

I'm very very sorry to hear about your father. Not an easy time. My thoughts are with you.

 

[phoenix13]

My heart is heavy now for you. I send you and father my prayers.

Speak from your heart, he will hear.

 

[BOOMSHAKER]

Tonka, myself and my family will keep you and your family in prayer my friend.

 

[tonka2]

I am on my way to see him they just did the cat scane.I will let u all know.Thank you for your support i have cut almost everyone out of my life to get my shit together.I even almost found my self giving into my ex last nite.I am glad even thow it may distant.I have been able to turn here i owe you all a great deal.One day i hope i can repay the favor.

 

[Sassy]

What really sucks about this .lets say they can cut the tumor down.How long will that last.That is just gonna prolong his pain let him live longer so he can hurt more!what the hell.i had a thought today and i feel like i am gonna go to hell for it.IT was that they just leave him alone.I felt like i wished he would die.No fucking machine no moning.I dont want him to try to say sorry for my past eithier and i think he would try.I dont understand this hole thing.If what does not kill you makes you stronger.I would rather stay weak.I really dont need any more life lessons.Or how about game over i did learn alot from my life this far so can what ever power is up stairs can you stop fucking with me and the pepole i care for.I now i asked for your prayes so yelling in that derection is prod not a good idea.I just see it like a pation if enough pepole sign it the higher ups have to listen.Sorry i guess this is all just some anger comeing to the surface.Thank you all again

I was going through this with my Grandfather. He passed away last month. Even though he was 84, I still hated to let him go, because I'm going to miss him. However, in my heart I need that it was for the best. He wouldn't suffer any more. Don't beat yourself up for the way you feel.

You and your family are in my prayers.

 

[DOGMA]

I hope the new's is good my friend. I think the way you feel is perfectly normal. I feel for you.

 

[Pekkerwood]

tonka...

Do not begrudge yourself your thoughts, they will be many and varied, however, the questions of fate, faith, etc. will probably best be explored later when you mind is more at peace. Now is not the time for big decisions or proclamations.

Peace is within your grasp. Being real, caring, loving, for both you father and for the others that are sharing your experience. By all means tell your father everything you want to say. I have done this more than once with my father, when we all thought the end was near and again when it was the end. How lucky I was to have the chance.

Please remember that not all communication is verbal or visual. You are putting off "energy", and people are receptive to it. I know it sounds like new age BS but it is true in the electromagnetic sense. Communicate, do it with feeling, you will not regret it and there is no down side.

I shared the same thoughts you are having about when the suffering will end, but at the end of the day the end came at the right time for him when he was about to lose most of his dignity. I am not made of the same stuff as he, I never would have made it that far. Forgiveness? Those are thoughts for another time, seeing you well and you being well is what matters. We have all carried our burdens.

My thoughts are with you in your time of need.

Pekkerwood

 

[lucian]

I am on my way to see him they just did the cat scane.I will let u all know.Thank you for your support i have cut almost everyone out of my life to get my shit together.I even almost found my self giving into my ex last nite.I am glad even thow it may distant.I have been able to turn here i owe you all a great deal.One day i hope i can repay the favor.

bro if you don think he can hear you just go and stay with him. be there, and comfort him. its gona tke some digging deep down on your part...but....he is your dad. i know you can do it bro....just try as hard as you an to be there for him. thats all anyone can ask. he will know you are there, and thats the important thing.
lucian

 

[Tom]

Sorry bro....

I'm sorry you or anyone has to go through this. I and my family went through this with my dad. He was only 62 and newly dignosed with esophogeal cancer that had metasticized throughout his body. We had to make some tough decisions. We had to discuss what my dad would have wanted. You may have to do the same. If he comes out of the ICU, what will the quality of his life be? Will he even know who you are? Will he have to be bedridden and fed through tubes? We discussed this as a family and came to the conclusion we wanted him off the ventilator and on comfort measures. They morphined him up really good...no pain whatsover and in a day and half he slipped peacefully away. To this day nobody in my family has any regrets and we know we did the right thing. We were with him the whole time he was on comfort measures and spoke softly into his ear reassuring him letting him know how much he was loved. I share this with you so maybe if those circumstances arise for you and your family it may be easier for you to make the decisions that wil be right for you, your dad and your family. I sincerely hope you find this helpful.

Tom

 

[tonka2]

It is done he is gone.Thank you all we will talk later

 

[Amazon Doll]

Oh Tonka...........................I'm so sorry

 

[mike1107]

It is done he is gone.Thank you all we will talk later

I'm truly sorry my friend ....

 

[pimpman]

oh my GOD im so sorry my brother.rough times really sucks.you and your family are in my prayer.