Bullied, picked-on, or an outcast as a kid?

[718si]

I've heard of, read about, and even experienced the effects of childhood trauma leading to bodybuilding as a teen or adult as a way to "compensate".

Going back as far as Charles Atlas (remember his comic strip ads about getting sand kicked in his face & losing his girl?), it's been widely documented that often times we embrace the gym and building muscle as a way to "get back" at those who tortured us as kids, or just to improve self-esteem which may have taken a hit from those instances.

Although not terrible (I'm well aware many had/do have it much worse than I did), my childhood experiences definitely led me to the gym seeking a bigger & "better" body. Being the child of a military family, I moved every couple of years and constantly was "the new weird kid" who spoke and acted differently than most of the kids I was surrounded with. It seemed every time I managed to become accepted, it was time to move on.

I didn't really get beat up, but there was a lot of teasing and ostracism - always the tall, lanky, nerdy kid who spoke funny.

As I get older (and hopefully wiser) I'm much happier and at peace with my life, but I wonder about how those experiences changed me, and if anyone else here has had any similar experiences they'd like to share.

 

[donjoy]

I think it was pure narcissism for me.

 

[dalvare1]

I always was, not ashamed to admit it, it is what it is, or i guess it was what it was

 

[TNH]

I have no problem admitting 100% that I began lifting because of insecurity.

I was the shrimp at school. Always the smallest or next to smallest kid in the class or my entire grade. Just short
and skinny. I got made fun of for it a lot. I hated it so much, people treated me like dirt because I was not as tall
or big as them, as if that means something about a person. I was a decent athlete, so I earned a little respect from
these jackass taller/bigger kids, but I still got teased about it. I can remember specific moments right now as if they
happened yesterday.
I got picked on and bullied a little bit, nothing too serious, but still enough to upset me. I developed a little man's
complex and by the time I reached high school, I was the bully....but not towards innocent people, always towards
the biggest asshole I could find.
It sucks because I was a really nice, peaceful kid that minded my business and was enthusiastic about so many things
in life. By the time I reached high school, I had become a bitter and hostile person, always quick to react violently
if someone even remotely picked on me or someone else near me.

The stupidest thing about it all is that being big doesn't mean shit. Young, dumb kids always say 'he's big, he could kick that
guys ass', as if a guy being big meant he could fight.
Now that I am much bigger, I have learned that I am shittier at fighting, I get gassed so quick compared to when I was
a more athletic 185 after lifting for a year.

Luckily I put it all behind me at some point in college, and now at 29 years old, I am not angered or violent at all.
Lifting went from something that I did because I was insecure, to a hobby that I have become quite passionate about.

 

[Gunsmith]

I was in martial arts at 5 all the way through jr highschool , i was also a bit bigger than everybody else but chubby.
My father told me that fighting never fixed anything and that i wasent in martial arts to learn to fight but to learn disipline and respect and only if i was in true danger was i to fight.
This led to me being picked on some for being passive but early jr highschool i had been taunted enough and made an example of sombody and it resulted in the worst ass beating my dad ever gave me.

I got into power lifting young as a result of trying to get better in football , after school , a knee surgery , two shoulder surgeries and back issue i decided that just abusing the fuck out of my body with ehavy weight wasent gonna end well for me so body building was the next logical step.

I dont train for anybody but myself and when i reach my goal ill find somthig else to do

 

[redz24]

I had to deal with some crap when I was younger because I was nice to one kid that got it every day. Kids can be pretty cruel but I never had any problems other than having to stick up for myself, by grade 10 I was 6'2 and over 200lbs and never again faced any problems. Looking back though alot of the people who were jerks then ended up no where and now I laugh when I see them and drive by in my brand new Benz. Karma defintiely exists.

 

[red5150]

called "fatty" til i got into sports. still called "fatty" while i was on my 2 year perma-bulker.

 

[mchief101]

got bullied everyday such as people calling me big head and shit.....felt secluded. started lifting weights, people rarely tell me anything now on.....no regrets that i started lifting

 

[saps]

No bullying here. I just wanted to be bigger and stronger.

 

[BigNShredded]

I was always very aggressive, even as a child. I actually had a lot of behavioral problems; kicked out of multiple schools, boarding school, private school, inpatient drug rehab/outpatient rehab, mental hospital, 15 months in a "wilderness program", 31 months in "Elan" behavioral modification system(which is not closed for ABUSE)..

I was "sent away"from home at 13 years old and did not return home until I was 17 years old. I came home once for several months after the wilderness, but ended up using drugs so I was sent away again(school system/parents).

In the end, I did not have a normal childhood in any sense. I never went to high school, I never had a prom, I never had a girlfriend until I came home. However. I received a very different type of "education" from these various hell-holes, and I firmly believe that it is the CHALLENGES AND STRUGGLES in our live that develop our CHARACTER and make us WHO WE ARE. These experiences endowed me with SUPER-HUMAN psychological abilities and an extremely superior level of self-awareness that allows me to get what I want from life and from others. Until I began living a virtuous life, I would use these powers for the wrong reasons; to manipulate, to get power, to feed my ego. Now I use my powers to help others grow and to be happy, as much as I can.

That which does not kill you will only make you stronger! I am very happy and satisfied with the man who I am today and I know I am on the road of success. For those interested, just google "The Elan School Abuses", that is where I was lacked up for 31 long, hopeless, agonizing months..

 

[Cito33189]

Best bully come back ever

Sydney School Bully Victim Fights Back - YouTube

 

[Jblack]

i was bullied and called cripple and such when i finally went back to school in my high school years. i kept growing each year and by my junior year no one said much to me anymore. its funny to run into the bullies now when i go back home to visit family if i go out w friends or families to the bars. i am happy to report most of my bullies are ugly, fat, and bald! hahaha jk...but its interesting to see them sing a diff tune when they see you all grown up! :headbang::headbang::headbang::headbang:

 

[jt7]

i started out lifting due to sports, then i ended up working at a gym which led me to getting a job from a guy at the gym so now im surrounded by a bunch of people who still workout and thats what keeps me going, its just a good hobby of mine i guess.

 

[TheGoldenChild]

I grew up a fatty. Was 5'3" and 220lbs hitting fifth grade. Went to a small private catholic school (for elementary/middle/high school) where bullying was not tolerated so wasn't bad other than a few minor comments. But I was sensitive and those comments stuck with me. Eventually started running and cutting cals and had a growth spurt at the same time so 6 months later, starting 6th grade I was 5'11" and 165lbs. Started lifting after that.

So was never bullied per se but being the lonely fat kid that nobody thought about always stuck with me. Was an all-area linebacker and was the most muscular guy in my class (played at 200lbs) in hs so was pretty popular, but was still the fat kid at heart.

Feeling inadequate as a child is something that doesn't go away easily. Sure most of you who bodybuild have very similar experiences.

 

[Big A]

I think it was pure narcissism for me.

Same.

I always thought I was shit hot, so I started bodybuilding to be even shit hotter

 

[thebrick]

I'm STILL pissed at Janet S., the cute little blonde in the 4th grade that dissed me. So I started deadlifting to ease my pain. Look at me now, bitch.

 

[Elvia1023]

No bullying for me. I had a good mixture of friends. Never wanted to be friends with the 'popular' kids... the same with the opposite. I was sort of in the middle. I got into abit of trouble but nothing too bad. In school I was known for my art and the fact I grew facial hair about 3 years before anyone else did. I changed alot during 16-20.

 

[Elvia1023]

I'm STILL pissed at Janet S., the cute little blonde in the 4th grade that dissed me. So I started deadlifting to ease my pain. Look at me now, bitch.

The first girl I ever kissed was the prettiest in my class when I was about 10. We went to seperate schools but strangely ended up in the same class in college at 17 and she was still very pretty and had a bf. 10 years on she is a fat lesbian with short hair. Moral of the story... well I don't have one just stood out to me as I saw her pic not long ago

 

[NZRABBIT]

Appreciate you 718si

Great idea for a poll/thread. I think the discussion here will be better than any psychology study could ever be.

I kind of think bodybuilding is THE solution for bullying and self-efficacy issues... and the consequent eating problems/obesity/anorexia etc.... we need more bodybuilding role models... another arnie and a female equivalent especially. qaq

 

[NZRABBIT]

Appreciate you 718si

Great idea for a poll/thread. I think the discussion here will be better than any psychology study could ever be.

I think bodybuilding is THE solution for bullying and self-efficacy issues... and the consequent eating problems/obesity/anorexia etc.... we need more bodybuilding role models... another arnie and a female equivalent especially.