Competition blues

VNV · Mar 9, 2009

I recently competed in a light-heavyweight NPC competition at 182 lbs at 5'11". I had 4.2% body fat according to a hydrostatic test, and placed 2nd in my weight class (out of 11).

After cutting down from 220 lbs, I thought I looked pretty freaking jacked. I've spent the last six years working up from 145 lbs at 11%. That's like 35 lbs of muscle in six years, and about six cycles of gear. If you do the math, I've increased my muscle mass by about 30% in six years. To me, that's amazing.

The problem is, friends and family thought it was kind of silly. When they thinking "bodybuilding," they think of the huge super-heavyweight guys you see on magazines. They thought my effort was "cute."

I've always done cycles with test. at about 500 mg or 750 mg/week. I find it mindblowing that my friends and family were not able to appreciate what I did. What should I do now? Stop competing because I'll never do well? Keep going how I am? Use more gear?

b-boy · Mar 9, 2009

if your happy with your looks and results then thats all that matters! your the artist its your canvas so mold it how YOU want it to look and don't worry about what others think of your artwork. yes we all want our work to be appreciated but not everyone will like your work! beauty is in the eye of the beholder!

BigCracker · Mar 9, 2009

As far as your family is concerned, you are pretty screwed because it's likely that they will never fully grasp the concept of your efforts. "Those who dance appear insane to those who can't hear the music"

As far as your friends go, maybe you should find friends that do understand and give you mad props for your BB efforts??? As a trainer I tell all of my clients that the people that they surround themselves with can have a huge effect on their fitness goals. I have little or nothing in common with the avg Joe Couchpotato, therefore the majority of my social circle is comprised of BB's and other fitness minded individuals.

Ultimately all that matters is that you set a goal and successfully followed through with it. You can't beat that with a stick.

Don't give up so easy. The journey has just begun.

marilyn · Mar 9, 2009

I agree

this coming from one of those in the past that didnt get it....I was one of those people in the past that didnt get it, and they may never get it or appreciate what you do or go through....It has to be what you want, and how YOU feel about yourself and what you do.

I'm lucky that Tony competes and my family is excited for me, but others think I'm nuts, or want the majic pill.....I tell them the majic trick is, get your ass off the couch, abra freaking cadabra

Alex A · Mar 9, 2009

First of all, many people, including most of the members here appreciate your efforts.. You should be proud to have gotten into contest shape and brought it to the stage.

That is more than 99% of people that work out daily in the gym have ever done.

Secondly, Once you do a few more shows, you will realize that your doing it for yourself and who cares about what people think, including your friends. ( you put in too much work to not get recognized)

When i first started competing, i would invite my parents, friends, etc. make a big deal about it.

And actually the pressure is worse when you do that. I would always be too concerned if my family was having a good time, had good seats etc.. When i started off competing in the smaller shows, i was winning and nothing feels better.

As you move up to the national shows, its tougher, not so easy to win and when your friends who are used to seeing you win seem disapointed because they really dont understand the difference between a regional show and pro qualifier.

Now, I say forget it! I dont even want them to come. Its too much work and they have no clue whats going on anyways.. They add stress to the whole thing so its not worth it. I compete for myself.

I compete to get in the best shape i possibly can. I enjoy documenting my progress along the way to learn from the experience. I enjoy the structure, and discipline. I do try to bring the best i can that day, but the process of getting in contest shape is what i love the most. Obviously you have done what you set out to do.

You will get support from the fans but do it for yourself. Do it for the journey. Preparing for a show is one heck of an acomplishment.
By the way, second place is no joke. Congrats.

juiceddunk · Mar 9, 2009

wait..your family said you weren't big enough??! thats awesome, my family tells me im way too big and im sure most bodybuilders get the same thing from their relatives. I've never heard of someones momma telling her boy he aint big enough! hah, but ur doing good bro, keep at it.

SAUCE · Mar 9, 2009

wow man! people dont realize how hard this shit is. people will aways be judgemental. hes to skinny and then your to bloated. ya but he takes that stuff. ill never be just right i guess but will continue to strive to be. god job brother and all you other freaks.

shawnkarbabacz · Mar 9, 2009

Yeah people that say stuff like that dont get it all. Competing even at low levels takes, imo, alot of dedication that is RARELY found in people. I cant imagine what it takes to compete at the high levels, and im shocked that people that dont compete at all arent amazed at competition at any level. I think its just easier for them to write it off as 'not a big deal' so they can go on thinking 'oh i could do that if i wanted to'.....

Keep up the good work man

Pekkerwood · Mar 9, 2009

The key is acknowledging something I'm sure you already know or feel. Your happiness is not dependent upon the thoughts of others. Our mind tricks us royally when we take an offhand comment from others or even an earnest comment of just a few words and try to extrapolate meaning from it. You just do not have sufficient data to do this. Are they having a bad day? Did they just get yelled at from their spouse? Did they put one ounce of thought into the words sprayed out of their mouth?

You cannot allow people to rent space in your head. A wise person once said something close to: "You wouldn't care as much what people thought about you if you knew how little they actually thought about you".

I am proud of your accomplishments and I do not know you. I do know what it takes to achieve putting on 35 lbs of muscle. I do know what it takes to turn your car into the gym parking lot as your coworkers are turning their cars into the Hooters.

Unless you are competing I certainly think the downsides outweigh the benefits to becoming a 250 lb snorting bull. My opinion only, but it seems like you are approaching it from a relatively healthy level. That is to be admired. Systems fail at the extremes.

tenny · Mar 9, 2009

sounds like you started bbing to be socially accepted

and let me guess....you are to everyone ,but the fam.....right???

they will never understand......wouldnt matter if your a superheavy or not bro

do what makes you happy

this is the prob i have with my wife....she doesnt understand that i have to have something that makes ME happy, and it happends to be this sport

pesty4077 · Mar 9, 2009

First of all, 2nd out of 11 is good, alot don't even place in the top 5. You don't do the BB shows for anyone, but yourself. I have a wife who can care less about BB, it doesn't interest her and I respect that. She might go to my show, but other than that she won't go to shows. Not everyone has the same interests as you, get use to it, and move on. Think as BB as a lifestyle, you might not be a pro, but you look and feel better than most and that is what counts. Improve for yourself and you will be alot less disappinted.

NPCS FINEST · Mar 9, 2009

You have to ask yourself this.

Who are you bodybuilding for? Your parents? Your friends? Or yourself.

sizeon · Mar 9, 2009

my family will prob never accept my bodybuilding, unless i was making a dam good living off it, then then would be like well good for me, but it doesnt stop me, gota member its a hobby

hellraiser27 · Mar 9, 2009

pesty4077 said:
First of all, 2nd out of 11 is good, alot don't even place in the top 5. You don't do the BB shows for anyone, but yourself. I have a wife who can care less about BB, it doesn't interest her and I respect that. She might go to my show, but other than that she won't go to shows. Not everyone has the same interests as you, get use to it, and move on. Think as BB as a lifestyle, you might not be a pro, but you look and feel better than most and that is what counts. Improve for yourself and you will be alot less disappinted.

Well said! And 2nd place?! Cmon bro thats awesome!

No one can make you feel worse than family. My first show I took 2nd. My picture and a whole article was written about me in the local newspaper. I sent the article to my mom. She complained because I didn't write a longer letter.
I have a personal fitness business. And every time I get on the phone with my mom and dad they say "are you still doing that fitness thing?"

I love BB. Its what I do best. I suck at sports. I don't drink or do drugs. Sometimes my biggest accomplishments are just going up 10 pounds on some lift. I go to the gym on Saturday nights for fun! Thats why I hang out on this board. These are people who understand the dedication you go through.

Welcome to the world of bodybuilding! The most misunderstood sport in the world!

Alex A · Mar 9, 2009

My friendships tend to gravitate toward people involved in the sport. Mostly other competitors or those who value being in shape and working out.

Thus i feel i probably have grown further apart from my parents and brother because of bodybuilding.

I know it kinda sucks, but I just dont look forward to dinner at moms house when i have to bring my own food

eroc613 · Mar 9, 2009

As a Bodybuilder your going to go through it. I go through it everyday. My training partner out muscles me by 25 lbs. , no matter what I do, people are amazed by him and I'm always in the background. But I'm gaining on him so I'm happy. I know i'm bustung my ass, and that's all that matters.