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Cracked Up Glossary Of Common Gym Terms

BigChef

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If you’ve ever had occasion to visit a gym, you’ve no doubt heard people talking about "feeling the burn" and "pumping up." But did you ever wonder what people were really saying? Here are some common terms and phrases that will help you to learn what is really going on in the gym.

In The Zone - Tired and incoherent during a workout. Commonly described out of the gym as "spaced out."


Extended Warm-Up - 20 minutes at low tension on the stationary bike then 20 minutes of casual stretching then a shower.


"Just One More Rep" - Said to a spotter during a set. Really means: "Lift the weight for me."


Forced Reps - For the reluctant exerciser, every single rep of a workout is a forced rep. This is especially true when they have a mean trainer.


Hack Squat - The position a cat gets into when he’s coughing up a hairball, commonly mistaken as a leg exercise.


"Can I work in with you?" - Translation: "Can I remove all your weights and sweat all over your bench?"


Drop Sets - What sometimes happens after doing a hard set of dumbell bench presses. A triple drop set occurs when you drop two dumbells and yourself to the floor.


Bulking Up - Name for the phase during which an otherwise healthy trainer will try to get bigger and fatter on purpose.


"I’m maxing out" - Translation: "I was going for 6 reps but I put too much weight on the bar and only got 1."


Cool-down - Sit on a bench and drink from a water bottle while talking about how much more you’ll lift next time.


Olympic Bar - Athlete’s nightclub.


E-Z Bar - "How dare you! I’m not that type of bar."


Squat rack - The lonliest piece of equipment in the gym.


"It’s all you!" - Said by spotter during the last few reps of a set. Translatation: "It’s mostly me."


Pro-hormones - Hormones that have lost their amateur status.


Meal Replacement Supplement - Cold pizza and warm beer.


Clean and Press - Surprisingly enough, it’s a shoulder exercise, not laundry instructions. A variation of it is even known as the Hang Clean and Press.


High Intensity Interval Training - Occurs when there are two or more flights of stairs leading up to the gym.


Skullcrushers - An exercise where you make like you’re going to bash your own head in with a barbell, a.k.a. lying tricep extensions.


"Hold the contraction at the top and squeeze for 10 seconds" - Said by a personal trainer when he or she wants to punish the client for missing a session.
Now that you’ve got an idea of what is being said at the gym, you’ll be able to converse comfortably with the natives. You will be completely understood in any gym in the world when you walk in and say "I just did two sets of high intensity intervals and now I’m ready for some forced reps" or "I’m taking a lot of meal replacement supplements because I’m bulking up."

:)
 
i like these....gonna post them up on the board at the gym this morning.....thanks for posting.....
 
funny!

And I will add...

"Are you done with that bench?" – Translation: hey Einstein! Will you kindly get your water bottle and towel off that bench so I can use it while you do your dumbell curls 6" away from the mirror? Its a weight bench, not your personal valet.
 
i like these....gonna post them up on the board at the gym this morning.....thanks for posting.....

Your welcome Mate :)

funny!

And I will add...

"Are you done with that bench?" – Translation: hey Einstein! Will you kindly get your water bottle and towel off that bench so I can use it while you do your dumbell curls 6" away from the mirror? Its a weight bench, not your personal valet.

LoL!! Good one thebrick
 
Lol! I'm "bulking" right now and am fatter than ever!! Hilarious!
 
yet another good post

frk
 
you forgot one.

"yo! can i get a spot?" - really means " can you come watch me bench press? I didnt do my hair, find my clean wifebeater, and my good jeans just so noone could watch my attempt at a jersey shore audition."
 
i recently joined a fairly hardcore gym where bunch of pretty big dudes work out. was scared to death there was only one squat rack cuz i only do squats for legs and was afraid it would always be taken... anyway, it had dust on it:eek::confused: WTF!?!?!
i swear outta prolly 50 big guys i am the only one that uses it.
pussies :rolleyes: lol
-JS
 

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