Disabling panic disorder, where to turn?

[RLara85]

Well whatever the cause (possibly PTSD, but that's not relevant) I've had severe panic disorder for nearly four years now. The first year I spent well over 10 grand on examinations, medications and what not. Physically I'm fine.... I have been on numerous SSRI's, Valium, Klonopin, Gapapentin, Ativan, Xanax, been to therapy, done CBT with different therapists, done Panic Away, Linden Method, Lucinda Bassets program, done cannabis and every legal herbal product you can imagine. The list of other medications I was prescribed is enormous, I completely lost faith in doctors after throwing so much money away and soon enough lost my insurance anyway.

Bottom line, the problem isn't getting any better. Out of all of the above Xanax was the only thing that has any effect at all, of course for obvious reasons I could only take that sparingly once or twice a week, even so its not getting the job done anymore.

Here's the issue, I can barely function at times, I can't go out to see family,, I often find it difficult to go to the store, as you can imagine working is nearly impossible. I have no insurance, since i have no job (vicious cycle!) so it's hard to come up with any proof of anything, four years ago over 10 grand were spent to determine that I was "fine".... that's not much help at all.

Where can I turn for help? What resources are available? I'm fortunate to be staying at home for the time being but obviously I can't just be here like a cripple forever, however it's hard to find a job when I can barely make it out to the car without vomiting or blacking out.

 

[Gators]

Did you see any Psychiatrists? I would strongly advise you to go see a MD about this if you haven't, and i'm a just a dumb farmer, but sounds like you have a social anxiety? This sounds like a serious serious issue, so again, my advice would be to find a Psychiatrist that can help you, i wouldn't waste any more $ on anything else. That's my 2 cents, i hope things get better

 

[RLara85]

Yep been to several Psychiatrists, none of their prescriptions have worked. Basically at this point I'm looking for free resources to turn to and some kind of opportunity for work that I can handle, not really sure I qualify as disabled, though technically I'm a lot more disabled than say, someone with a back problem.

 

[notsobig32]

As far as prescriptions, it doesn't sound like mcuh is going to work. I am by no means a qualified therapist/psychiatrist but for me, finding an awesome physocologist and going through a few years of cognitive therapy(lol, i saya few years......next appointment is tomorrow), i feel much better equipped to deal with my problems and i very rarely get any panic attacks or anything these days.

Maybe sigmund will chime in and give you some reccommendations.

 

[Gators]

I understand about the scrips not doing any good, but my thoughts were a Psychiatrist might be better equipped to apply therapy to dig to the root of the problem, and my guess is you have something 'buried' that is causing that. We all have a bag of bricks we're dragging around, and mine has fallen on my head a couple times, but am in the process of digging it out and dealing with it through therapy and AA. Not sure what it is, but i'm digging for it, if that makes sense. Not sure what else to tell you, wish i could offer more, but there are some VERY caring brothers here that maybe can help.

 

[HOTROCKS]

Meditation

 

[RLara85]

Yeah I'm not going to give up, It keeps getting worse but until I'm completely crippled in bed I'll keep fighting this. My main problem right now is money and work....I'd be open to going to more therapy but thousands have been spent, I'm flat out of cash and I can't really handle a typical job right now. A single initial visit at a doctor will cost me upwards of $200, and that's just a 10 minute consult, even at $20 I just can't spare the cash with no job. I've been looking for legit work from home opportunities but every single one turns out to be a "become a millionaire in three months" MLM type scam, I'm a hard worker I just need to do so from home or at my own pace somehow, something legit that is actually challenging and will pay me enough to survive on. I hate the idea that people hear "work from home" and they think I'm some lazy guy that wants some easy data entry gig, I actually want complex work and I want to get paid well for it, I have a disability I am trying to work around but my knowledge and other qualities are still there.

Fortunately I have my own weight room at my parents where I'm staying, that at least lets me keep up with bodybuildiing, it's the one goal that I can still pursue for the most part. I've managed to go from 140lbs to 215lbs without stepping foot in a public gym, all from a little 8x8 room in my home, I'm pretty sure I can apply the same dedication and discipline to work.... now if I can just find something.

 

[RLara85]

BTW. I did manage to graduate college... I have no idea how I did it, I actually got kicked out halfway through because my condition got so bad but I came back and it was a nightmare, but I got a degree. It was exhausting, I had a full schedule and also worked in a lab doing research (this was an awesome gig, I had my own office and was basically alone most of the time researching all the data, I only had to run a few experiments a day on participants but the experiments were computerized so that pretty much took care of itself)

It's not something I could have kept doing though, I did want to go to grad school but it's too much.... between classes I'd basically go splash water on my face and try to calm myself down or go lie down somewhere and just rest, I skipped so many lectures b/c of full blown panic attacks. Popping Xanax got me through presentations and exams etc. It was just horrible, I loved the experience but dealing with PD it was just too draining, I remember getting homme and I would just be completely spent from constant anxiety that I would just crash on the bed for an hour or two, not like me at all.

 

[Gators]

If you can tap into some type of factory 2nds outlet or someone who can hook you up w/ overstocked products, some $ can be made ebaying. I have a buddy that's disabled w/ a heart condition, and he makes some decent coins by ebaying, i think he makes a few k / mth.

 

[overman]

psychologist

Consider locating a psychologist who has experience with panic attakcs/panic disorder. He or she may use interoceptive exposure to induce symptoms similar to a panic attack (desensitize ya). At the same time, he or she may use cognitive restructuring to formulate (and replace) maladptive or irrational beliefs/thoughts. Relaxation exercises, meditation, etc. work with regular and consitent application.

You may not be panic disorder free, but you are likely to interpret the physical sensations of panic disorder as a mild inconvenience (converting "thoughts of dying" to "another silly panic attack- I can get through this"). You may feel or experience relief by developing control and understanding of the panic attacks. No caffeine, smoking, or any other stimulant (i.e., albuterol, clenbuterol, etc).

Propranolol may reduce the intensity of the symptoms. Talk to a qualified physician and psychologist (both) to coordinate care and determine an effective treatment plan. Any other symptoms? Fears of public? Social phobia? Tendency to avoid most things? Trauma? Drug use?

If this post is inappropriate, please edit or erase accordingly. Just trying to help.

 

[EVERLAST]

???

I get a little of this from time to time.
Not sure why but feel it is related to stress in my case.
Nothing helped me either. SSRI, prozac and others all worthless to me.
Exercise and diet work best for me.
Do something physical when you feel the onset.
What triggers you?

 

[FilthyMick]

Well how about your diet? Have u had any hormone bloodwork or say a complete panel to check for anything that could be wrong with your body maybe its diabetes,are you eating enough carbs during the day? You are on a muscle/bodybuilding/steroids forum. Have u used any juice in the past? maybe u didnt do a pct properly.

i know when i feel hypoglycemic i get anxiety. Also are you drinking alcohol, or smoking cannabis i get terrible anxiety days after i smoke the littlest bit, very weird but it is definitly the after effects of the pot.
im sure u know about GABA and the stronger supplement, Phenibut. if not they help with anxiety but like benzo's u will develop a tolerance.
I wish the best luck to you, those are just some of my ideas when i think of anxiety. I also tend to get it at nighttime, i hate it but i work hard to avoid it.

 

[617ricky]

If it really is that bad as you make it sound, there's gotta be some way you can get on disability.. That's what it was kinda like for my uncle (although not nearly as bad as you describe), and they ended up diagnosing him as bipolar, and throwing him on disability ~50 y/o, so he just collects now, lazy bastard lol.

 

[RLara85]

Yeah I'm sure with enough perseverance I can get on disability... that's not my style though, the system is abused by so many people who don't truly need it, I don't want to add to the problem.... not without putting up a fight at least. If it gets to the point where I'm so sick I can't function, sure I'll turn to it, but not yet.

It's also depressing to be on it IMO, the thought of just taking money from the government without contributing much to society is enough to drive me up the wall, I don't know how so many people in this country with the most minor injuries or disabilities do it without a care in the world and actually seem happy to just get by through life doing the bare minimum. It's just not me, but again if it comes to that then I will accept the help, I'll never give up on fighting it though.