- Joined
- Mar 29, 2005
- Messages
- 147
I wanted to share my experience with my surgery with you all. It was by far the most scared I have ever been in my life the morning I arrived at the hospital.The surgery was scheduled for 9:30am so I figured I would at least be with my wife and family until 9am but I was wrong.At 7am that took me back into a room and took blood in case I would need a transfusion and put me in my gown. I set in a little room by myself scared with a million things running through my mind thinking I done this to myself and now I may die during surgery and look what I have put my beautiful wife through.At about 8am they let my wife see me for about 15 minutes and I tried to act strong and not cry in front of her.A man from church came to pray with me before surgery and held tears back as he prayed so my wife wouldnt see me cry.After that they took me back in a room full of patients getting ready for surgery im talking about 20 people and it kinda freaked me out.They gave me something to help me relax and the next thing I know im out.The surgery lasted 4 1/2 hours and my family and friends waited on me and they said my wife cried the whole time. When I woke and they got me stable they took me to a room and I was out of it and they had me on a pain pump of diualid (I think thats the spelling I just know its stronger then morphine.) I had a cather and a tube that was stuck in the side of my neck that went to my heart. At one point when they moved me from the stretcher to my bed my heartrate dropped and they were freaking out and had to get my heartrate back up it really scared me I was out of it on drugs but I knew something was not right and I could hear everyone in the room freaking out.But they got it back up and I just layed there in so much pain with about a 12 inch cut down my belly. They kept adding bandages to my belly because I was bleeding and fluid was pouring out of me.For the next 2 days I lay there pretty much out of my head and in pain going in and out trying to talk to family.By the third day I was doing better and they took the cather and tube out of my neck which was painful.They also took me off the pain pump and gave me oral meds.I also walked some on the third day which was hard and I was dizzy and in pain.After 5 days they let me go home and I was still in pain.Just imagine a 12inch cut down your belly and how sore you would be after they cut through all your abs and all that muscle.You dont realize how much you use your abs until this point belive me you use them for everything.Im know recovering doing well the Dr. said im recovering faster then anyone he has ever had.I know this was the worst pain I have ever had in my life and also the most scared I have ever been.Im staying strong and not getting down because Once im healed I know I will be back to my old self again.Im eating great and holding my weight steady and should be able to train again in 3-4 weeks.Im a different person now after this I cherish things more now and I know whats important to me.It really made me grow up and I realize what happened to me was a wake up call and I needed it more then ever.Im not glad it happened but I realize it happened for a reason.SO when I get down and depressed I think about that and how its just a bump in the road and time will pass and things will go back to normal again but after this bump Im a better man now and a stronger one.At one point I didnt know if I would live when my tumor ruptured and I was scared it really wakes you up when something like this happens to you.But I never blamed anyone but myself and I have forgive myself and im moving on now.I cant say the choices I made did this but im sure they didnt help any but it was my choice and I done it so I live with that and I have learned from that.I know when I go back to training I will be bigger and better then ever because im so much smarter now and realize so many more things not just in bbing but in life and I mean bigger and better as in a bigger and better person in life!So I will post some pics up in a few months and you willl see a new and improved and smarter and stronger 2BIGFRED.Its just a bump in the road and im moving on everyday.
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